PERSONAL : I AM NOT LIKE ANYONE ELSE

I'm not like anyone you've ever met before. Unless you've already met me... stalker. :-)

Sure, I could bore you with delusions of how wonderful I am, but lets face it, I'm sure you've already read this about two hundred times in all the other profiles... I believe that actions speak louder than words, so why bother?

A lot of people have told me that I'm "special" or "gifted". I think they're jealous that I can count to 10, or 20 with my shoes off, and even to 22 in the shower. (don't ask)

Anywhoo... I surround myself with optimistic people who are going somewhere in life, and no, I don't mean KFC. I'm very open-minded with an international outlook, a risk- taker who is always up for a new adventure. I love dogs, beaches, meaningful conversations, and self improvement.

I keep very busy and love my life. I don't have the time or inclination to date everyone under the sun anymore, and I have no problem meeting people. I'm extremely selective, and am just fine if I don't meet anyone on here... BUT, if you're someone really really really special, I'd love to have you along for the ride and make our already great lives that much better.

There's something very special about you. You are curious about the world around you. You can take a joke and are not easily offended. You believe that sarcasm is a spice of life. You can spell (without using spell check), and are generally happy. You want to see the world and travel, love to kiss, you cuddle like a cat on the sofa, and shag like a tiger in bed. You are thin, athletic, (curvy in the right places is a plus), your eyes are bright and convey the depth of your spirit. You are beautiful inside and out, and you think you can actually keep up with me.

The rest is negotiable. (well, you can’t be a blood relative)

PERSONAL/ LOVE LETTER

Dear Love,

As i sat there and watched her sleep i saw her beauty every part of her body gives me this feeling that i can't contain it's been  a long time since the last time i said i love myself let alone another, but something about her just gives me my life, i feel very free with her, everything disappears when i hold her, to have her arm around me heals my beaten soul and everything that has ever made me wonder about if there's someone that could help me or love me, now i know that there is someone and now i'm holding her, with her harmless eyes resting deep in sleep as her beautiful body sleeps i just  wonder for how long this wonderful feeling will last for both of us... For with every breath....  I belong to you. Every movement I make...   acknowledges how I belong to you. My eyes see nothing I belong to...  except you. I lie still...and belong to you, I stand tall...   and belong to you, I move through this world...  and belong to you. Every ounce of my soul,   my spirit, my body, is yours...  full of desire... to belong to you.I awake and you are on my mind. I slumber and still you I find. My mind, my heart, my soul speaks nothing but your name. My lips long for a passionate kiss. filled with neve rending bliss. My body longs for your touch. I love you so much.You are MY LOVE.

PERSONAL/LOVE LETTER: MY LOVE

My Love, adoring angel, who was sent from above.I would give you anything and everything that I hold dear for something to assure me that you'll always be near. You see, it was not your looks that captured my heart. My shallowness you mistook for I loved you from the start. Just as these words form a feeling of mine. I yearn to be with you, anywhere, anyplace ...everywhere, every time. It is that very thing which holds our relationship true...TIME...The best gift that I could give you. Besides the love and beyond the romance, the most satisfying moment was when our eyes met at first glance. Those eyes that sparkle like the morning dew.You are the one. The thought I let replicate in pleasure. The droplet of softness reaching for me through all time involved with much pain distraught and slowly closing inside.. You've been the only one who I've ever believed could bring me the vast oil-painting of the sky to forever give me the feeling I've been searching for without ever having the joy of swirling in it. A feeling  even i don't know exists until you show itself to me. You are the one the gentle emotion that had long ago settled in me. An image that could never be shaken loose from the ends of this heart.I know it's you who will mend the wrongs the agonies plaintively mourning in my scars. You are the one..The taste of heaven lies upon your lips. I feel it with my trembling fingertips. You touch my lips and grant my wish. I'm engulfed in a pool, your pool, our pool of love. It surrounds me with a cool, calm and comforting feeling. That makes me want to surrender to it all.

PERSONAL/LOVE LETTER: DEAR SOULMATE..THIS EVENING

Dear Soulmate

This evening is filled with rapture, the stars that glimmer are shining so bright. I ate my dinner. I took my shower, got ready for the next day. I chose to end the remaining hours of my day typing on the keyboard as I lay. I think of you tonight and those thoughts gas up my imagination,cutting an incision into my soul, These verses I write are your creation.Tonight I have no worries about staying up and concentrating on you.I have to get up in the morning to go to work and here it is 12:22. But no worries, with thoughts of you. I feel so much peace. It feels like a break away from life underneath a moonlit sky in the east. I burn a candle tonight and incense smoke lingers through the air. A glass of wine stands by my side.Into the computer screen I begin to stare, and again I think on you. If only you were here with me. If only you knew and could see the things my mind paints so vividly. I am quite sure that from that point in time until the time you leave. You would have agreed that night was a night you were pleased. Tonight I am so lonely but yet occupied with your beauty and grace. My mind spins back the times when I first witnessed you within the same space. I saw a strong woman whom I wished had the time for this strong man,When I met you my thoughts went to London, Paris, Italy, and back to this part of the land.How could I explain it other than to say sometimes you melt like ice. Sometimes all it takes is a vision which makes a decision that can change your life. I was curious but, yet, cautious like an animal exploring new terrain.Each time I entered your territory there I stood and wanted to remain. I was glad to meet you, under any other circumstance .I would have kissed your hand just out of kindness to show you what kind of man I am. I like the vibration you set in the place along with the scent you place in the air. Your appearance defined my style of beauty each time my eyes began to stare.You are the breath I breathe,You are the reason I'm here.My breathing becomes faster when you're so close. All that i am, all that i feel, i'm burning for you, with every breathe i breath wanting you more...my heart is no longer my own. You have come to water my heart, to keep it alive just a little while more...you see that it's thirsty, this you know. Like the ocean is my love for you. Thousands of fathoms deep.Filled in my mind are you While I'm awake or in sleep.

PERSONAL/ LOVE LETTER: DREAMS

Dear Soulmate,

Dreams were meant for dreamers,so a dreamer I will be;For now that is the only way I have you here with me.Every night when I lay down and close my eyes to sleep; I drift away to my own lil' world where you are mine to keep... ...Then morning brings the pain again and then soon I must realize;That with each passing day the early light must rise.So night time is my special friend, my secret hide away;Where I can go to be with you...and forget the coming day.How I?d like to hold your hand...walk -run away- run home again, hand in hand, in wonderland -in a dream,and not letting go of your hand. I'm drawn to your tender lips To feel them, to touch them.To trace them with my finger tips .They hold so much beauty. Soft like a rose and so petite.So seductive, intriguing and enticing.Their allure captivating and sweet.The feel so sensuous, so lush.The sensation of your lips upon mine Their taste bursting with passion like strawberries fresh of the vine. I long for the touch of your lips.The desire for a kiss grows strong like the bee on the petal of a rose.Your lips on mine are where they belong. To love someone is a frightful thing. To open oneself and allow them in. To tear down those walls.Those barriers you've built. To expose your heart at all. To give up control.To allow them to know.To trust without reason To accept imperfections. To go on through the seasons.To never run out of affection

/LOVE/DATING: VIRTUAL WOMAN....

Virtual woman, I embrace you. Once harbored in my dreams as a fantasy, hope and aspiration which fueled my fire, my quest for my queen, my soul-mate.Virtual woman, like an angel you spread your holy wings of joy over my battered heart. With gentle breaths you revive my soul;  with inspiration, and unconditional love.Virtual woman, your DNA matches! Like a carbon copy, reflecting my better half; reminding me of a potential, I had long forgoten. Virtual woman, you are sent by God,because your love is like no other.Like radiation's rays, your love penetrates my soul,  causing its molecules to vibrate with joy in your presence.

PERSONAL/ JOURNAL/DATING: RECALLING ONE OF MY FIRST ONLINE DATE

I never really meant to start internet dating, but after getting divorce from a  5 year marriage and realizing my circle of single friends had dwindled as I'd got older, and I didn't want to date someone at work, as that's always struck me as complicated and potentially disastrous. Unfortunately, while I was handsome, intelligent, funny, healthy, have a great job, great family and normal, that gave me no guarantee that the person I'd meet would be the same. On my first online date, the girl thought she'd sexily nibble me over dessert: unfortunately, her "sexy nibble" was actually an incredibly hard bite and I ended up screaming in pain, bleeding all over the table and walking away thinking she was completely mental. It was only a week later, that bite wound was infected. So yeah, an infected human-bite wound. Beat that for a dating story.While this was clearly one of the worst dates ever

PERSONAL/JOURNAL/ LOVE/ DATING: THIS SEARCH FOR LOVE

I have been on this journey in search of love for as long as I can remember.  The great love.  The Notebook, Nicholas Sparks happy ending love.The love that gets you out of the bed in the middle of the night to drive ten hours.  The love that has us on the living room floor thankful in laughter. Foolish boy as I was, I thought across the decades I had found it. So many long term relationships, was married once before. Each time, more hopeful and when it turned out not to be it, not to be the love of a lifetime, I felt like less of myself. It’s that going back and forth.  It’s the watching of others coupling and doing all of the things you want to do. I think you reach a point when you wonder when is it my turn?.  And it’s not just that, it’s that your friends wonder when it will be your turn too.  They gently prod and ask. They worry about the dating decisions you’re making. When I tell you I have done some crazy shit in the name of love? There isn’t anything you can tell me you’ve done that I haven’t done or came close to doing.  There isn’t much I haven’t considered doing. You see, the way I’m wired – I will do anything for love.  I will do whatever I need to do to make sure the one I love knows they’re loved.  Call me a fool, but I would rather be a fool with the love of my life in my bed than the smartest person in the room who has no one to go home to.I  have always search for someone to appreciate me in a way I hadn’t seen before. I’ve given multiple chances when there shouldn’t have been any. I’ve dealt with ridiculous rules, dates, orders and mandates – all in the hopes the woman I loved would love me. I’ve laughed a lot. I’ve cried – a lot. I can honestly admit I’ve been flipped inside out.

The reality is my love story is still unfolding. It’s just those of us who manage to have our hopes high and our love quotient even higher are always willing to think, to believe that it’s a miracle I mean, for me – love is all consuming.  Like a Phoenix who catches fire.  I forego everything for someone else when I’m in love.  I’m servant by nature. But I want someone who wants to serve me the same way. For so many of us, love has either become all we think about and all we focus on or we’ve abandoned the idea of it completely.  What if we’re supposed to live fully without it?  Could you deal and handle that idea?  I can't

We are always searching for the intimate and close love. A love transcending time, circumstance and even death.  The wife who validates you, who sees you intimately.  Who loves you in a way no other person can.  Although she hasn’t found me yet – or maybe she has – and hasn’t told me, I will honestly tell you I look for it every day – still.  Around every corner.  In the eyes of those I love.  I look for it.  I can’t help it.  I think it’s part of my path. But the things I’ve learned along the way in search of the perfect love, have ultimately taught me I was loved.  I am loved in ways I hadn’t thought possible.  It’s taught me about love, about myself and about the things we most yearn for in the quiet hours of our lives.

FROM A FAN

The funny thing about sex and money is this. Take any man off the street, well from the majority.  A "normal" healthy nice male,  middle aged, with no extremely bad past, like being a mercenary, spy, abused child, rape victim, terroist recruit, etc. they all want the same thing. Put 2 thousand dollars in their hand and tell them they can have whatever girl they want for 24 hours and do whatever they want. Yes, they will all like different types, big small, pale dark, artsy or nerdy, old or younger. And they might have different favorite positions, like oral sex more or less, or anal. Different levels of roughness and kinkiness. But I swear give a man money and tell him he can have whatever he wants for a night and all the normal nice ones, will want the same.

Given that it the girl with the most perfect appearance according to them, they all want something quite normal. A good kisser, a girl that actually cums, a girl that will swallow, but most importantly the thing that all men really secretively seek and if could if it were possible would even pay for is love. If they could have whatever they wanted, if they could own a woman for a night, most men would want her  and the irony is that is the one thing you cant buy

PERSONAL/ LOVE LETTER: WE ARE LIKE TWO TWIN SUN

Dear Soulmate

We are like two brilliant twin Suns,  circling the universe, sustained in travel, by the fuel that is our Sun's giving hearts. In search of that special person or match, who will rekindle our own love's fire. Waiting to find and fulfill our destiny, allowing us shine eternally brighter. Searching for that feeling that we are needed as well as, waiting to utilize and share our internal and eternal warmth, for it is our nature. My love, you and I resided in the same orbit so long ago as two twin Sun's. For a hot and tender moment we joined together, creating a warmth and heat that could be felt throughout our complicated universe. We drifted apart, though destiny brought us together again. You and I circled the entire universe, seeing and experiencing so many things. Never finding or replicating the feeling of eternal brightness and completion that we experienced years ago. Now our orbit's gravity is strong. We have learned how to navigate our Sun's heart. We now fulfill our destiny and merge together to create one magnificent, bright and brilliant Sun. Our Sun's heart mergees. Together we emit a warmth and heat that will never again drift or burn out. We have found our place in the universe, joined together as one brilliant Sun, fixed in our destiny's universal home. Together we have the power to keep each others Suns hearts eternally blazing, as well as the power to warm our loves universe and all that is around us. You were my Twin sun and my eternal heat. Now we are eternally one. You are the flame that sustains my hearts warmth, keeping my Suns heart burning forever. We shine together as one... now and forever.Only you can make me happy. I see the sun in your smile, the moon in your eyes and the eagle flying in your soul.You are the love of my life,the other half of my soul.You hold my heart in your hand. You are life to me.And when you love me (like only you can do) my heart and soul flys to meet you.Our spirits join. I love you like no other. Only you have touched the hidden places in my soul. I will love you forever.

PERSONAL/LOVE LETTER: IMAGINE MY SOFT PRECIOUS KISS

Smile, and imagine my soft precious kiss upon your lips.Our bodies burning and aching with desire and love. Feeling, breathing, craving, and so sure of it all. Heaven found in a momentary glance into shining eyes. Opened windows to the soul and our dreams An unplanned touch from my roaming fingers Caressing gently the nape of your neck.Slowly running though your hair
Our hearts racing through time.While our memories try to slow it down Every touch, scent, smile, sound, taste, and feeling.Never wanting it to end Like the undying love for you within in my heart. My soul, my life, and my dream come true

PERSONAL/LOVE LETTER: YOU FASCINATE ME

Lady, 

You fascinate me with all your illustrious beauty.I recognize all your splendor when I first noticed your smile that entered into my heart.  Such good times when I'm near you; you captured my adoring eyes anxious to  experience your love.I blow you kisses anticipating the taste of your lips. Ahh, how I admire you and your feminine grace and the warmth I noticed in your cheeks, blushing with romance and love's fire. You release my heart from pain and let me love you... my lady. I dream of you night and day, vivid pictures of you in my mind that filters into my spirit.  I'm enchanted by the loveliness of your face and you fascinate my soul. I long to be held in your arms.Keep silent, my love, and let me just look at you and swoon in your moon-glow eyes.   You are the deliverance of my life; all the expressions of your lips  lift me to glorious skies. Give me for the rest of my life your sweetness so ravish- ing as melodies of cooing doves, and I love to be loved by you as My Valentine forever and more...I can't believe I've found you, my one true love, my heart. You've helped me see the world as I never have before.You helped me see the beauty in everything as I never have. The beauty in me...You've helped me smile a smile of happiness, heart, and love. Happiness of being with you; a heart to see the beauty, and the love of having you. I can't believe I've found you...my wonderful heart, soul, inspiration.You inspire me... to be me.My inspiration grows fonder by the passing of each moon, each sun, and by the passing of each feeling.You are my sun, my moon, my heart.I hold you in my loving arms and hen I awake to find you still.I find you in my arms,smiling and dreaming happily...then you whisper.... "I've found you !"

REVIEW/LOVE/ DATING: MY CHARLIE NICHOLSON

 Who's Charlie Nicholson? The name comes from the movie... High Fidelity.

I find myself writing about this movie .Part of the reason I enjoy the film so much is that I relate to it like it’s my story.



From the movie:

 Number three in the top five all-time breakup list? Charlie Nicholson (Catherine Zeta-Jones). Sophomore year of college. As soon as I saw her, I realized she was the kind of girl I'd wanted to meet ever since I was old enough to want to meet girls. I mean, she was different. She was dramatic and she was exotic. And she talked a lot and when she talked she said remarkably interesting things about music, books, film and politics. And she talked a lot. And she liked me. She liked me. She liked me. At least I think she did...We went out for two years and I never got comfortable. Why would a girl, no, a woman, like Charlie go out with me? I felt like a fraud. I felt like one of those people who suddenly shave their heads and said they'd always been punks. I was sure I'd be discovered at any second. And I worried about my abilities as a lover. And I was intimidated by other men in her design department and became convinced she was gonna leave me for one of them. Then she left me for one of them. The dreaded Marco... (One rainy night, he caught Marco with Charlie) ... (A while later, after reconciling with her, he realized that she wasn't for him) And I lost it. Kinda lost it all. Faith, dignity, about fifteen pounds. When I came to a few months later, I found to my surprise I had flunked out of school. Started working at a record shop. Some people never got over 'Nam or the night their band opened for Nirvana. I guess I never really got over Charlie. But the thing I learned from the whole Charlie debacle - you gotta punch your weight. You see, Charlie, she's out of my class. She's too pretty. Too smart. Too witty. Too much. I mean, what am I? I'm a middleweight. Hey, I'm not the smartest guy in the world, but I'm certainly not the dumbest. I mean, I've read books like 'Unbearable Lightness of Being' and 'Love in the Time of Cholera.' And I think I've understood them. They're about girls, right? Just kidding... Anyway, me and Charlie, we didn't match. Marco and Charlie matched.



another quote from the movie:

I can see now that I am doomed to die a long, slow, suffocating death. And I try to figure out why. Of course there’s envy, why isn’t my life like this? And sure I want their money and clothes and jobs and opinions, and I’d like to have advice for jet-lag, but that’s not it. … It’s something else. And then it dawns on me: Charlie’s awful. … Maybe she’s been like this all along. How did I manage to edit all this out? How had I made this girl the answer to all the world’s problems?

PERSONAL/LOVE LETTER: DEAR SOULMATE

Dear Soulmate,

With my paint. I'll gather a blend of colours and I'll shoot a rainbow that is long enough to reach your place. And then I'll take your hand, hold it tight, like a pen,and we'll walk on top of that rainbow.From there, I'll take you to the most beautiful paradise you've ever fantasize in your eyes. It is splendidly colourful, like the Roman candle in your favourite tale. With my silver plane we'll fly far and pass by heaven's gate. With my thriller boat we'll sail deep beyond the sea and pass through the ocean world. Just you and I, like two swans in love in a small pond of bond. And again, it'll always be you and I like two doves in love in a small house of grove.In life we'll both entree the place of romance and enjoy the beauty of romance with complete bliss, only with you, I'll have a romance of romantic love..I wondered the other day,what life would be like without you...The way it was before you. It would be day after day of loneliness,The wind would bite because you Wouldn't be there to walk before me,to block the hurt of others.For me to find you without the heartache that others have had to endure is simply, ...a Miracle. Your love is my inspiration, my greatest possession.Being with you is a life savoring full satisfaction. Oceans i will cross, portals i will always suppress because i love you, the more but no less

PERSONAL/ LOVE LETTER: DEAR SOULMATE

Dear Soulmate,

Every second we are apart,you're on my mind and in my heart.Every second we are together, I need you like the bird needs feathers.With this statement above, it is clear in my mind, You weren't put on this earth for the whole of mankind.God put you on this earth just for me, you are an angel, that I can see. I will give you anything you adore,for when I'm in your presence I'm in utter awe. I would share with you every rainbow, Take away bad things, so the pain will go. I have something else to tell you now, It has everything to do with why and how. Why I need you as much as I do and how it is possible to truely love you. I got hit in a place by cupids arrow,
In the only place where it works, it's narrow.  It goes through the skin and past the chest, Moves to the left and lies to rest.This perfectly precisioned flying dart, hit me right in the midst of my heart.This wound is never healing, Never sealing. and this bleeding for you, Is a love that is true. This is why my face has a smile, You are my soul mate, you make me worthwhile.At the same time you make me strong and weak, Making one thing certain, my heart does seek, the same in return all mentioned above,For this will prove my enduring love. Looking into the starry night, filled with a glow so bright,The days seem to go so fast,thinking of the time that's past. A smile comes which seems so rare, I picture your face and can only stare,Your beautiful eyes shine and gleam, You're like an angel, straight from a dream This feeling seems unknown to me,And it's being with you that sets me free, Your image spreads its wings and starts to fly,It begins to dim and look so shy,Leaving me with memories to keep,Along with that smile... I fall asleep.