Dear world,
I like the idea that somewhere, you're hiding my love! sometimes, i imagine that we're doing the same mundane things at the same time...waiting as the time counts down until the day that we finally meet.
that makes the whole world beautiful to me.
thank you
Thursday, July 19, 2012
LOVE LETTER/PERSONAL: THIS IS HOW YOU MAKE ME FEEL
You know when you have a really really great dream, and you're super happy, and then you kinda wake up halfway, and drift back off to sleep, hoping to keep the dream? You know the feeling when you get that awesome dream back immediately and continue with it? Yeah. That feeling.
When you have to take a walk, run or bike ride somewhere and the sun is shining, and it's warm, but not too hot, and the grass is really green and the bees are buzzing? That happiness.
When it's a cool night, and there is a huge storm brewing outside, and thunder clangs, and you snuggle deep down in the warm covers? That safeness.
When you're in a crowded place, and you smile at a little kid, and their face lights up and they get a huge grin? THAT.
That is how you make me feel.
When you have to take a walk, run or bike ride somewhere and the sun is shining, and it's warm, but not too hot, and the grass is really green and the bees are buzzing? That happiness.
When it's a cool night, and there is a huge storm brewing outside, and thunder clangs, and you snuggle deep down in the warm covers? That safeness.
When you're in a crowded place, and you smile at a little kid, and their face lights up and they get a huge grin? THAT.
That is how you make me feel.
LOVE LETTER/ PERSONAL: IT'S DIFFICULT TO DESCRIBE MY LOVE FOR YOU
It's difficult to describe my love for you. If love were something easy, it wouldn't matter. It wouldn't be powerful. It wouldn't be something worth fighting for.
Every now and then, life may take a short intermission. You have to stop yourself, grab some water, stretch your limbs. But, sometimes when you least expect it, someone comes along who makes your story resume. Someone who lets you catch your breath, and realize that the show must go on. Just when you've forgotten, you're reminded that the curtain will rise for Act Two. The conflict will be resolved. This wasn't the end, after all.
Someone who ushers you into your happy ending. For me, that person was you.And to me, that's love.
Every now and then, life may take a short intermission. You have to stop yourself, grab some water, stretch your limbs. But, sometimes when you least expect it, someone comes along who makes your story resume. Someone who lets you catch your breath, and realize that the show must go on. Just when you've forgotten, you're reminded that the curtain will rise for Act Two. The conflict will be resolved. This wasn't the end, after all.
Someone who ushers you into your happy ending. For me, that person was you.And to me, that's love.
THOUGHTS: SOMETIMES IT'S EASIER TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CITY THAN A PERSON
Sometimes it's easier to fall in love with cities than it is with people. Take, for example, New York - a monolithic tangle of skyscrapers and spires, or Paris - full of poetic details and varying shades of grey, or Chicago - windy and sunny summers with shiny windows reflecting the inherent bustle at stop lights. Places that hold special moments in time, suspended within the corner cafes and parking garages, lingering in old bookstores and taxi cabs, mingling with the smoggy air of the streets. My favourite memories are cradled
within these sprawling human centres.
But what do you have to offer me? You're a person. You're a tangle of long limbs and a mop of messy brown hair. You're hardly a city. Yet, you gaze at me with those piercing eyes and I feel as vulnerable and
exhilarated as I do in the streets of Manhattan - where the people passing by on the street and the windows of monolithic buildings are all silent, are all watching me. Perhaps you're my own private, portable, New York, Paris, Tokyo, Chicago, whatever.
within these sprawling human centres.
But what do you have to offer me? You're a person. You're a tangle of long limbs and a mop of messy brown hair. You're hardly a city. Yet, you gaze at me with those piercing eyes and I feel as vulnerable and
exhilarated as I do in the streets of Manhattan - where the people passing by on the street and the windows of monolithic buildings are all silent, are all watching me. Perhaps you're my own private, portable, New York, Paris, Tokyo, Chicago, whatever.
LOVE/ JOURNAL: LOVE IS AS POWERFUL AS IT IS RANDOM
People change many times while growing from a teenager to an actual bill paying, drives the speed limit, respectful, adult. I hate to break anyone's bubble here, but whatever social status you may hold in your teens to early twenties won't mean a DAMN thing in ten years. Pretty girls don't live happily ever after, nerds do get the gorgeous girls, and the stupid kids sometimes make millions on the simplest business idea. The point being, is change. I changed, she changed. The world around us changed. We had beepers when we started dating! Online communication was in its infancy. We called eachother from our parents home phone line, put letters on each others windshields, threw a rock or two at each others windows, but usually we waited in agony to speak to eachother. The only "stalking" was actually following someone (CREEPY), no one learned about each other from Facebook (LAZY) or sent the random "hey, what's up?" text message (KILLER OF ROMANCE). We had to SPEAK to eachother. Dating, when I was younger, was being in a constant state of confusion until emotions were verbally exchanged face to face. That solid, body to body, verification of mutual attachment will always be an integral component to establishing a relationship. I doubt there's a way to get out of having the "talk".
If you read my blog you know i was in love with Joanne..my first love, we were crazy about each other, we spent three years being together, we matured sexually together- good memories ;). Our relationship had
trust, loyalty, humility, humor, excitement, passion, security and we LOVED. There would never be anyone who could hold a candle to me, or to her. We could duck and swerve past anything life was pitching. We
were happy. We were complete fools.
Happy fools, that's an accurate description. It took only a few simple twists of fate to break into our "home",
which to us was each other. There really are no fingers to point, reasons to place blame, or angry words to throw about that would make this story more interesting. The nasty deeds do make for better entertainment, but the weight on ones' heart is a private burden. Sadness and even some humiliation is universal to everyone, there is no immunity to being hurt.
We broke up. Once, that was all it took. We stayed in close contact for long and painful while. We always hinted to each other that one day we would be together again. I was the only one. . . . . . .hmmmmm. It wasn't much later when I found out she was with someone else, and even though I wanted to dramatically scream my objections, affections, loyalty, bleeding from my core, LOVE, to her-------I didn't. I was heart broken, but I never said a word.
Did I put myself through the "why not me?" self-doubt spiral of depression? Absolutely. I could find a shred of "what could have been" in every song, show, movie, poem, book, and place. I compared every single girl I dated to how she made me feel- That's rational, to think being in love comes so easily and frequently. I made terrible decisions while still hurt from losing her Love is not only blind, it's stupid, deaf, clumsy, indiscriminate, tricky, spiteful, careless, and worth every single second of the most dreadful unpleasant emotions it leaves in it's aftermath.
I can speak to her once in a blue moon..like every few years... now and barely remember the young man who was such a basket case back then. Asides from some really great memories, funny stories, personal
jokes, and general care for each other, we don't have anything in common anymore. She went straight to being in love with someone else, sharing life and all it contains in that union. It's her way of knowing where she stands.
I spent a lot of my time getting to know me. Am I a good person? Do I like who I am? What do I want? Where do I stand, what do I believe? The answers weren't always pretty. I guess it was my version of AA for I don't want to end up a hateful generic old man
I honestly had no desire to date, flirt, and certainly DID NOT want to form a crush on anyone. This is the wrong time in my life to bedistracted. I'm focused, or I was till she walked in my path. I barely know her, but WOW does it feel like something wonderful is going on in between everything that's NOT being said! So here I am, late at night, writing
Life is weird. No, you probably never will understand. Love is as powerful as it is random. Yes, you will get badly hurt. Yes, you will get over it. Yes, you will find yourself seeing someone in a way you "never have before" again. And maybe, this one will be "the one". Who knows? All those cliche's you hear about life & love came from somewhere. Put out into the world what you want, maybe it will find it's way back to you.
If you read my blog you know i was in love with Joanne..my first love, we were crazy about each other, we spent three years being together, we matured sexually together- good memories ;). Our relationship had
trust, loyalty, humility, humor, excitement, passion, security and we LOVED. There would never be anyone who could hold a candle to me, or to her. We could duck and swerve past anything life was pitching. We
were happy. We were complete fools.
Happy fools, that's an accurate description. It took only a few simple twists of fate to break into our "home",
which to us was each other. There really are no fingers to point, reasons to place blame, or angry words to throw about that would make this story more interesting. The nasty deeds do make for better entertainment, but the weight on ones' heart is a private burden. Sadness and even some humiliation is universal to everyone, there is no immunity to being hurt.
We broke up. Once, that was all it took. We stayed in close contact for long and painful while. We always hinted to each other that one day we would be together again. I was the only one. . . . . . .hmmmmm. It wasn't much later when I found out she was with someone else, and even though I wanted to dramatically scream my objections, affections, loyalty, bleeding from my core, LOVE, to her-------I didn't. I was heart broken, but I never said a word.
Did I put myself through the "why not me?" self-doubt spiral of depression? Absolutely. I could find a shred of "what could have been" in every song, show, movie, poem, book, and place. I compared every single girl I dated to how she made me feel- That's rational, to think being in love comes so easily and frequently. I made terrible decisions while still hurt from losing her Love is not only blind, it's stupid, deaf, clumsy, indiscriminate, tricky, spiteful, careless, and worth every single second of the most dreadful unpleasant emotions it leaves in it's aftermath.
I can speak to her once in a blue moon..like every few years... now and barely remember the young man who was such a basket case back then. Asides from some really great memories, funny stories, personal
jokes, and general care for each other, we don't have anything in common anymore. She went straight to being in love with someone else, sharing life and all it contains in that union. It's her way of knowing where she stands.
I spent a lot of my time getting to know me. Am I a good person? Do I like who I am? What do I want? Where do I stand, what do I believe? The answers weren't always pretty. I guess it was my version of AA for I don't want to end up a hateful generic old man
I honestly had no desire to date, flirt, and certainly DID NOT want to form a crush on anyone. This is the wrong time in my life to bedistracted. I'm focused, or I was till she walked in my path. I barely know her, but WOW does it feel like something wonderful is going on in between everything that's NOT being said! So here I am, late at night, writing
Life is weird. No, you probably never will understand. Love is as powerful as it is random. Yes, you will get badly hurt. Yes, you will get over it. Yes, you will find yourself seeing someone in a way you "never have before" again. And maybe, this one will be "the one". Who knows? All those cliche's you hear about life & love came from somewhere. Put out into the world what you want, maybe it will find it's way back to you.
PERSONAL/LOVE LETTER: AND THERE YOU WERE
It was a pattern. I looked for my 'soulmate' everywhere. Every now and then, I would find someone who was intrigued by me, but once they saw the wreck I was inside, and how difficult I was to get through to,
they disappeared. Leaving me alone and not knowing why I wasn't good enough for them to stick around. I was hungry for love, but genuinely thought that I would never find it.
Eventually, I gave up altogether, believing that this love thing just wasn't for me. Believing that no one would actually put in the effort to get through to me. No one would actually stay. Still wondering why, but finally accepting that the tornado that was my life would just not let me be happy.
But then the dust settled.
And there you were.
they disappeared. Leaving me alone and not knowing why I wasn't good enough for them to stick around. I was hungry for love, but genuinely thought that I would never find it.
Eventually, I gave up altogether, believing that this love thing just wasn't for me. Believing that no one would actually put in the effort to get through to me. No one would actually stay. Still wondering why, but finally accepting that the tornado that was my life would just not let me be happy.
But then the dust settled.
And there you were.
LOVE/THOUGHTS: LOVE IS PURE
We always feel the most for the ones who don't love us back. this is because we never got to be with them, never got the chance to see all of the things we didn't like about them, the things that would drive us crazy. we hurt because there was a possibility that was never confirmed or denied, unknown, they could have been 'the one'.
If they were the one, they would see all the beauty and magic within you. your voice would send a shiver down their spine, your smile would make them want to explode. if they were the one, they wouldn't let
someone like you leave their life without a fight.
It doesn't make you any less of a person for loving someone who doesn't feel the same. love is pure. never feel embarassed or pathetic for loving someone. but don't work too hard in an attempt to make someone love you back. don't wait until they start using that love to use and manipulate you. no one is attracted to a lack of self respect.
above all else, love yourself. forgive yourself of the mistakes you've made. learn from your bad decisions and never look back. the person most deserving of your love is you.
If they were the one, they would see all the beauty and magic within you. your voice would send a shiver down their spine, your smile would make them want to explode. if they were the one, they wouldn't let
someone like you leave their life without a fight.
It doesn't make you any less of a person for loving someone who doesn't feel the same. love is pure. never feel embarassed or pathetic for loving someone. but don't work too hard in an attempt to make someone love you back. don't wait until they start using that love to use and manipulate you. no one is attracted to a lack of self respect.
above all else, love yourself. forgive yourself of the mistakes you've made. learn from your bad decisions and never look back. the person most deserving of your love is you.
LOVE/THOUGHT/PERSONAL: ALL YOU NEED IS YOU
So, here's the thing. you think you'll never stop crying. you think you'll never feel good enough. you think that everything's a part of this horrible pattern that makes up your life. you think nothing will ever change. And then, one day, you change. you wake up one morning and that pervasive sadness is just kind of gone. you think about her and you can't for the life of you remember what it was like to be in love with her. you walk through life and one day, you think, you know? I am good enough. and you're kind of surprised it took you this long, and you realize that no matter how easy it is to hate yourself, it's so much better to love yourself.
and you know the best part, you wake up one day alone in bed and you realize this is what you needed all along, just you. so here's to you. here's to realizing you're good enough, and that no one else needs to realize and tell you for you to know.
and you know the best part, you wake up one day alone in bed and you realize this is what you needed all along, just you. so here's to you. here's to realizing you're good enough, and that no one else needs to realize and tell you for you to know.
POETRY: GIVE ME YOUR HEART
Tell me you love me
that you need me by your side,
Take your soft and gentle hand
wipe these tears from my eyes.
Give me your heart
and I will give you mine,
Share with me this lasting love
for all the rest of time.
Let love be our sun, moon, and stars
and follow the way love leads,
I will follow you my love
If you will follow me......
2
Leaving you one single red rose of love,
placed passionatly on a pillow of dreams,
with the soft touch of desire and passion;
The desire to hold you tight,
and the passion to make love to you all;
Through the night, for the rest of my life
touchin' you softly in the middle of the night,
as to confirm to my heart
that you are still the love of my life;
I lay beside love and felt the contentment
of happiness fill my heart.
For this I leave you one red rose,
on a pillow of dreams,
where you lay your head.
and where also my love lays with one red
rose of love.
3
I found you by the murky waters
that were blending with the evening sky,
I found you standing by the Hudson River,
and the sight of you just made me cry.
Many times I heard the river calling,
I heard it calling, but I did not know why.
You said,
Hallo, nice to see you, I do come here often,
since the time that you said, Goodbye.
You said you were leaving, but are coming back,
when the endless sky is blending with the river.
You will watch.
You said: "I still love you, and feel
completely lost without your touch.
And then...
I felt the waters, and the moonlight touch me,
and when you left, I could not say that much.
Except:
I did not know you come here so often.
I did not know you cared so much.
I found you standing by the river,
and the sight of you just made me cry.
Many times I heard the river calling,
I heard it calling, but I did not know why.
4
Oh! Perfect love, I've not yet seen
my life so long awaits your mortal self.
Come hasten soon the perfect realm of you
into my life.
The smell of love's perfection
haunts my mind.
Into oblivion carry me,
sweetly, deeply
into this world of another kind
No sadness there will be
to linger;
Ere not pain, nor hurt, but give so sweet
this love of infinite bliss
into my heart a kiss.
Twill be sometime soon for
this I know-
my waiting time is in my soul,
so deep, telling sure but true
will stay within, therein to keep
5
perhaps you are only a dream in my crazy life
but that's ok because i would like to sleep forever
just so i could dream about you
or perhaps you are just a mirage,
the imagination of my desert loneliness,
perhaps you are my only fantasy
that drives me wild and makes me feel excited;
perhaps you are all these things
but what i do know
is that
you are
the flavor and the taste of love,
the inspiration of my life,
the heat in my cold nights
and the magic that makes my heart feel alive.
6
A soft, sexy voice, a flirt and a tease,
An intelligent mind, with passions to please.
As I listen to your voice, a chill runs down my spine,
I guess you can't see you're everything to me,
I wish you were mine...
You speak so sweet, you speak so low,
And in my heart I truly know.
That you and I were meant to be,
Together forever, through eternity.
Wanting to touch you, talking into the night,
So relaxed with each other, the mood is so right.
Cuddling and warm, sharing the scene,
Listening to you, living my dream.
Talking of fantasies, what's on your mind,
You are so gorgeous and ever so kind.
My shy personality and aching heart,
Know we should not be apart.
Someday, I hope, the time will be right,
When we'll be together, both day and night.
that you need me by your side,
Take your soft and gentle hand
wipe these tears from my eyes.
Give me your heart
and I will give you mine,
Share with me this lasting love
for all the rest of time.
Let love be our sun, moon, and stars
and follow the way love leads,
I will follow you my love
If you will follow me......
2
Leaving you one single red rose of love,
placed passionatly on a pillow of dreams,
with the soft touch of desire and passion;
The desire to hold you tight,
and the passion to make love to you all;
Through the night, for the rest of my life
touchin' you softly in the middle of the night,
as to confirm to my heart
that you are still the love of my life;
I lay beside love and felt the contentment
of happiness fill my heart.
For this I leave you one red rose,
on a pillow of dreams,
where you lay your head.
and where also my love lays with one red
rose of love.
3
I found you by the murky waters
that were blending with the evening sky,
I found you standing by the Hudson River,
and the sight of you just made me cry.
Many times I heard the river calling,
I heard it calling, but I did not know why.
You said,
Hallo, nice to see you, I do come here often,
since the time that you said, Goodbye.
You said you were leaving, but are coming back,
when the endless sky is blending with the river.
You will watch.
You said: "I still love you, and feel
completely lost without your touch.
And then...
I felt the waters, and the moonlight touch me,
and when you left, I could not say that much.
Except:
I did not know you come here so often.
I did not know you cared so much.
I found you standing by the river,
and the sight of you just made me cry.
Many times I heard the river calling,
I heard it calling, but I did not know why.
4
Oh! Perfect love, I've not yet seen
my life so long awaits your mortal self.
Come hasten soon the perfect realm of you
into my life.
The smell of love's perfection
haunts my mind.
Into oblivion carry me,
sweetly, deeply
into this world of another kind
No sadness there will be
to linger;
Ere not pain, nor hurt, but give so sweet
this love of infinite bliss
into my heart a kiss.
Twill be sometime soon for
this I know-
my waiting time is in my soul,
so deep, telling sure but true
will stay within, therein to keep
5
perhaps you are only a dream in my crazy life
but that's ok because i would like to sleep forever
just so i could dream about you
or perhaps you are just a mirage,
the imagination of my desert loneliness,
perhaps you are my only fantasy
that drives me wild and makes me feel excited;
perhaps you are all these things
but what i do know
is that
you are
the flavor and the taste of love,
the inspiration of my life,
the heat in my cold nights
and the magic that makes my heart feel alive.
6
A soft, sexy voice, a flirt and a tease,
An intelligent mind, with passions to please.
As I listen to your voice, a chill runs down my spine,
I guess you can't see you're everything to me,
I wish you were mine...
You speak so sweet, you speak so low,
And in my heart I truly know.
That you and I were meant to be,
Together forever, through eternity.
Wanting to touch you, talking into the night,
So relaxed with each other, the mood is so right.
Cuddling and warm, sharing the scene,
Listening to you, living my dream.
Talking of fantasies, what's on your mind,
You are so gorgeous and ever so kind.
My shy personality and aching heart,
Know we should not be apart.
Someday, I hope, the time will be right,
When we'll be together, both day and night.
Wednesday, July 18, 2012
PERSONAL/LOVE: MASSES OF ATOMS
It comforts me to know that all these feelings that I'm feeling are just chemical reactions in my brain, just tiny collisions in an organized collection of cells and electrical impulses.
To know that when I look at you... my heart only races because of a biological reaction to your specific facial arrangment, the symmetry of your features, and undetectable pheromones to do with the diversity of our individual immune systems.
And thank goodness that you also know that people are just masses of atoms, joined in a specific, yet slightly variable pattern, no more important in the overall equation of the universe than the smallest insect, the most insignificant fleck of dust.
But knowing that in the blink of an eye all we know will be gone and long forgotten,
I want to hold on to you and never let go.
To know that when I look at you... my heart only races because of a biological reaction to your specific facial arrangment, the symmetry of your features, and undetectable pheromones to do with the diversity of our individual immune systems.
And thank goodness that you also know that people are just masses of atoms, joined in a specific, yet slightly variable pattern, no more important in the overall equation of the universe than the smallest insect, the most insignificant fleck of dust.
But knowing that in the blink of an eye all we know will be gone and long forgotten,
I want to hold on to you and never let go.
LOVE: LOVE IS ABOUT
One of the hardest parts about growing up is realizing that relationships are not as magical or as effortless that we, as children, so naively believed they were. Love is not all about red roses on valentine's day, or waltzing in an empty room to no music. it is not always comprised of sexy, passionate kisses in the rain, or romantic candlelit dinners. Love does not equal that perfect, pristine wedding on the beach, no matter how much we wish it did.
No, sometimes love is broken dishes on the floor, and tempers so high they threaten to burst through the ceiling. it is a drunk prince charming or an slutty snow white. it is loneliness echoing and aching deep inside your bones and it is the feeling of tears drying on your face like wax.
Love is not disney. love is complicated. love is messy. When i was younger, i believed that you could title a loved one. oh, she's his fiance. oh, they're boyfriend and girlfriend. oh, he's her husband. it is only now, that i realize this is not how love works. there is not a name to fit every relationship, although we've certainly tried with terms like friends with benefits and fuck buddies. We keep convincing ourselves that our happiness lies on one set of lips, that our lives would be beachy if we just managed to receive one kiss, or one wedding, or one boyfriend.
But love isn't about kisses or weddings or titles. It's about how much you care, how long you will listen, how far you will go and to what lengths you will forgive. The bottom line is, if you truly, deeply and honestly love someone, you will want them in your life, even if you never receive that kiss
No, sometimes love is broken dishes on the floor, and tempers so high they threaten to burst through the ceiling. it is a drunk prince charming or an slutty snow white. it is loneliness echoing and aching deep inside your bones and it is the feeling of tears drying on your face like wax.
Love is not disney. love is complicated. love is messy. When i was younger, i believed that you could title a loved one. oh, she's his fiance. oh, they're boyfriend and girlfriend. oh, he's her husband. it is only now, that i realize this is not how love works. there is not a name to fit every relationship, although we've certainly tried with terms like friends with benefits and fuck buddies. We keep convincing ourselves that our happiness lies on one set of lips, that our lives would be beachy if we just managed to receive one kiss, or one wedding, or one boyfriend.
But love isn't about kisses or weddings or titles. It's about how much you care, how long you will listen, how far you will go and to what lengths you will forgive. The bottom line is, if you truly, deeply and honestly love someone, you will want them in your life, even if you never receive that kiss
LOVE/ PERSONAL; I WANT YOU
Do you know how you can tell if you really loved someone?
You miss them.
At the end of the day, it's the pain of their absence that stands as a testament to how you truly feel. You might think of them and reflect fondly back on the memories you shared together, or lapse into a sweet (albeit short) nostalgic moment, or experience the most fleeting sense of wistfulness. Which is all well and good...
But when your heart feels like it's being torn in two and your chest constricts and your thoughts all muddle together and you have to shut your eyes so tightly that little stars explode behind your eyelids - that's when you know you had something real.
PART II
It's funny, we all know what we want but we never actually get it. We all want to look a certain way, to wear certain clothes, to have a certain amount of money or success. We all want to be happy and feel good about ourselves. We all want that one person who will complete us, make us feel whole — like those missing pieces were never even there.
We want and we want, but we never quite get it. And if we do, it isn't until much, much later when it doesn't matter much anymore. Or we have to sacrifice something else, and in the end we always end up wishing
to go back and redo the mistakes we've made. But it doesn't work like that, nothing ever does, nothing is ever simple.
I want you, and I guess I sort of have you, but not in the way I want. I want you to be right here, right now, but you aren't. I want you to ask me out but you haven't. I want to kiss you but I haven't. I want to hold your hand again and cuddle with you again because that was nice, it was really nice.
I want all of this, and I want to finally get it. For once, let me have something.
You miss them.
At the end of the day, it's the pain of their absence that stands as a testament to how you truly feel. You might think of them and reflect fondly back on the memories you shared together, or lapse into a sweet (albeit short) nostalgic moment, or experience the most fleeting sense of wistfulness. Which is all well and good...
But when your heart feels like it's being torn in two and your chest constricts and your thoughts all muddle together and you have to shut your eyes so tightly that little stars explode behind your eyelids - that's when you know you had something real.
PART II
It's funny, we all know what we want but we never actually get it. We all want to look a certain way, to wear certain clothes, to have a certain amount of money or success. We all want to be happy and feel good about ourselves. We all want that one person who will complete us, make us feel whole — like those missing pieces were never even there.
We want and we want, but we never quite get it. And if we do, it isn't until much, much later when it doesn't matter much anymore. Or we have to sacrifice something else, and in the end we always end up wishing
to go back and redo the mistakes we've made. But it doesn't work like that, nothing ever does, nothing is ever simple.
I want you, and I guess I sort of have you, but not in the way I want. I want you to be right here, right now, but you aren't. I want you to ask me out but you haven't. I want to kiss you but I haven't. I want to hold your hand again and cuddle with you again because that was nice, it was really nice.
I want all of this, and I want to finally get it. For once, let me have something.
LOVE/THOUGHTSWHY WE STAY
Everyone know about love....so I feel that we have something in common, you and I. Whoever you are. Everyone on here, knows what it's like to have an insatiable urge to just talk to that one boy or girl, man or woman.
And then there's the few of us that know what it's like to love someone with a burning passion that we know will leave us burnt out in the end. We feel it get more intense and swear we'll stop, after one more kiss, one more text, one more time. We swear it'll get better, and if it doesn't we'll leave for sure.
But we know we won't. Somewhere inside of us, that little voice of reason and honesty whispers, "Even if you had a thousand reasons to leave, you would look for just one to stay." That voice is right. Because, the way I see it, when you truly, really, without a doubt are one hundred percent commited and in love with another person, nothing and I repeat, nothing can stop you from waiting day after day after restless day for that person. But when that person makes it crystal clear that they don't feel the same way, either through actions despite their words, or words despite their contradicting actions, something in us shatters. It hurts more than anything because those incredibly strong feelings are so hard to come by. But don't let it break your heart, don't let it tear you down. Don't start speeding through new people, new relationships, and new experiences to try to forget the pain. It won't take away the pain. It'll make it even worse. Because every time you close your eyes and feel someone else's lips, you'll open them only to realize they don't belong to the person whom your heart belongs to.
That is all.
And then there's the few of us that know what it's like to love someone with a burning passion that we know will leave us burnt out in the end. We feel it get more intense and swear we'll stop, after one more kiss, one more text, one more time. We swear it'll get better, and if it doesn't we'll leave for sure.
But we know we won't. Somewhere inside of us, that little voice of reason and honesty whispers, "Even if you had a thousand reasons to leave, you would look for just one to stay." That voice is right. Because, the way I see it, when you truly, really, without a doubt are one hundred percent commited and in love with another person, nothing and I repeat, nothing can stop you from waiting day after day after restless day for that person. But when that person makes it crystal clear that they don't feel the same way, either through actions despite their words, or words despite their contradicting actions, something in us shatters. It hurts more than anything because those incredibly strong feelings are so hard to come by. But don't let it break your heart, don't let it tear you down. Don't start speeding through new people, new relationships, and new experiences to try to forget the pain. It won't take away the pain. It'll make it even worse. Because every time you close your eyes and feel someone else's lips, you'll open them only to realize they don't belong to the person whom your heart belongs to.
That is all.
PERSONAL/LOVE: SHE IS MY CUP OF TEA
The first kiss is like a cup of hot tea.
Its just you and the cup of tea. You're sitting alone. The setting is beautiful. You're dying for the tea but you know it's too hot now. But you know it has to happen. It has been in your mind long enough. You're just waiting for the perfect moment. Maybe now it's not too hot -- You lean forward, lift the cup. And while you bring it closer towards you, you don't look at anything else but it so that nothing goes wrong. Your hold is neither too delicate nor too strong. And then you bring it towards your face. You close your eyes to enjoy the moment so that you have no visual distractions.The first sip is just a touch with your lips.
Not perfect yet? You wait another half a minute, keeping it right next to your face, doing things to make the moment come faster. This cycle goes on for a while, till the moment is reached when you feel that your chances can't get any better.
You bring it closer this time. Now you've decided that you're going to do what you had to do, no matter what. You close your eyes. You hold it tight in your hands. And then each centimetre you bring it towards
you, there is apprehension whether it will be as good as you had expected it. But now there is no stopping you.
Once again, first a slight touch. But this time, there is no resistance. The lips open up. The contact is made. You let it consume you. Your mind is blank for a moment. It's perfect. Its so sweet that you're overwhelmed. You continue. You feel something rushing inside you. It's just so good.
But obviously you don't finish the cup of tea in one go. After a few moments of the nirvana, you stop and place the cup back safely. And smile. Because now you know that the whole cup is yours. And no matter
what, you won't let anyone take it away from you.
How do I know? I guess it's because when it comes to love, she is my cup of tea
Its just you and the cup of tea. You're sitting alone. The setting is beautiful. You're dying for the tea but you know it's too hot now. But you know it has to happen. It has been in your mind long enough. You're just waiting for the perfect moment. Maybe now it's not too hot -- You lean forward, lift the cup. And while you bring it closer towards you, you don't look at anything else but it so that nothing goes wrong. Your hold is neither too delicate nor too strong. And then you bring it towards your face. You close your eyes to enjoy the moment so that you have no visual distractions.The first sip is just a touch with your lips.
Not perfect yet? You wait another half a minute, keeping it right next to your face, doing things to make the moment come faster. This cycle goes on for a while, till the moment is reached when you feel that your chances can't get any better.
You bring it closer this time. Now you've decided that you're going to do what you had to do, no matter what. You close your eyes. You hold it tight in your hands. And then each centimetre you bring it towards
you, there is apprehension whether it will be as good as you had expected it. But now there is no stopping you.
Once again, first a slight touch. But this time, there is no resistance. The lips open up. The contact is made. You let it consume you. Your mind is blank for a moment. It's perfect. Its so sweet that you're overwhelmed. You continue. You feel something rushing inside you. It's just so good.
But obviously you don't finish the cup of tea in one go. After a few moments of the nirvana, you stop and place the cup back safely. And smile. Because now you know that the whole cup is yours. And no matter
what, you won't let anyone take it away from you.
How do I know? I guess it's because when it comes to love, she is my cup of tea
PERSONAL/LOVE/THOUGHTS: LOVE IS NOT A FEELING. LOVE IS ACTION
Love is not a feeling. Love is being caring. Caring about everything that is important to them. The little things, the big things, the things that they say don't matter, but you get that inner feeling that they do. Caring about how your actions affect them. Caring about what they want. Caring for the fragile heart that is concealed within their frame of flesh.
Love is being faithful. Faithful to your word and to your promises. People make promises without knowing the extent of what they mean. Love keeps true to those promises no matter how hard it gets. Love is being faithful to them in an emotional sense. You have no eyes for anyone else. It means being faithful in a physical sense. You do not imagine committing promiscuous acts with anyone. Not even them.
Because Love means respect. Respect for their wishes. Respect for what they need. Respect for their body and for their mind; you strive to keep them in the best condition. You respect their boundaries, again, both physical and emotional.
Love is honest. It strives to keep dishonesty out of the relationship, knowing that it will tear it apart from the roots. Keeping lies away from the tongue, that could kill any blossoming concoction of emotions. It realises that the object of the affection deserves the truth in all cases. Knowing that it's best, no matter how it hurts.
Love is serving. It does anything possible to cater to the needs of the other. It recognises that it wants to do anything it can to better the life of the other.
Love is selfless. It puts off its own desires and wants for the other. It shares its thoughts, life, resources, and anything it can with the other. It gives them what they want at the mere expense of what it itself wants. It does so with complete happiness.
Because Love is humble. It realises that it has no authority or reason to be looked up at. It realises that credit does not need to belong to it. It realises that pride will split the branches of the partnership; it will create strife and dispute. Two of the things it strives so hard to demolish.
Love is being patient. Understanding that human nature is hard to deal with. Understanding that patience is key to creating a solid foundation. It realises that rushing with leave holes and unstable foundations that will leave everything to come crashing down upon itself, causing tears and heartbreak that could easily have been
prevented.
Love is understanding. It understands all of this. Whether it chooses to follow this depends on the degree in which it occurs. It understands that a human is nothing without love. Love makes the world go round. It understands that without this, it is nothing.
Love is not a feeling...
Love is an action.
Love is being faithful. Faithful to your word and to your promises. People make promises without knowing the extent of what they mean. Love keeps true to those promises no matter how hard it gets. Love is being faithful to them in an emotional sense. You have no eyes for anyone else. It means being faithful in a physical sense. You do not imagine committing promiscuous acts with anyone. Not even them.
Because Love means respect. Respect for their wishes. Respect for what they need. Respect for their body and for their mind; you strive to keep them in the best condition. You respect their boundaries, again, both physical and emotional.
Love is honest. It strives to keep dishonesty out of the relationship, knowing that it will tear it apart from the roots. Keeping lies away from the tongue, that could kill any blossoming concoction of emotions. It realises that the object of the affection deserves the truth in all cases. Knowing that it's best, no matter how it hurts.
Love is serving. It does anything possible to cater to the needs of the other. It recognises that it wants to do anything it can to better the life of the other.
Love is selfless. It puts off its own desires and wants for the other. It shares its thoughts, life, resources, and anything it can with the other. It gives them what they want at the mere expense of what it itself wants. It does so with complete happiness.
Because Love is humble. It realises that it has no authority or reason to be looked up at. It realises that credit does not need to belong to it. It realises that pride will split the branches of the partnership; it will create strife and dispute. Two of the things it strives so hard to demolish.
Love is being patient. Understanding that human nature is hard to deal with. Understanding that patience is key to creating a solid foundation. It realises that rushing with leave holes and unstable foundations that will leave everything to come crashing down upon itself, causing tears and heartbreak that could easily have been
prevented.
Love is understanding. It understands all of this. Whether it chooses to follow this depends on the degree in which it occurs. It understands that a human is nothing without love. Love makes the world go round. It understands that without this, it is nothing.
Love is not a feeling...
Love is an action.
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