Dearest Future Soulmate,
Fear is destruction...Fear is only as real as I may think it is and lasts only for as long as I hold unto it. Fear can be the theif of a life and the killer of a soul, but is dispelled the minute one takes action to face it head on and / or decide to let it go. Once we place fears aside, we realize that what held us captive were simply what we fed our mind and it really had no power over us...only what we gave it. To let fear go can best be described as "freedom".
To love is to live and to love is the essence of human existence; we cannot function without love and even further can die without it. Love creates; it touches the very core of our being and gives us the unseen force to believe, to grow, to try, to change, to give, to be. Love is faith and love is empowering. To some degree we've all had a taste of what it means to love and be loved unconditionally; yet it often doesn't remain alive and strong and certainly as we move away from creation (love) and toward destruction (fear). We've all made decisions based out of fear and damaged things that were dear to us. Nonetheless, in the midst of destruction, love is a mere decision or choice away...the decision...simply to release the fear or release the destructive force that is keeping us from loving and start to create again.
Freedom from the fear of failure, rejection and the unknown makes room for love and faith to grow. But without the release or dismissal of fear, love is smothered, cannot bloom and reach its full potential. Love, faith and fear cannot dwell together, one will always over-power the other, with that power coming from the force that one decides to feed. Fear is always seeking to paralyze our thinking as is the force of love and faith always seeking to strengthen and free us.
My Dearest, as I pull these words together, I work tirelessly to stay in a place of love and likewise work with the same effort to hold your hand and pull you close to me...so as to keep you in the same place. I miss you when fear takes you away from me and aknowledge my responsibility for bringing you those fears although it is only you that can ultimately let those fears go and allow our love in its place. Please don't close the door to love.
Sunday, August 5, 2012
PERSONAL/ LOVE LETTER: CAPTIVATED FROM FIRST GLANCE
So I'm "unlovable" or at least that's what I have been telling myself. I've been unlovable since I was a child and left completely on my own to decide my worth, my value, my place in this world. I don't blame my parents, they did the best that they could do
There are places and events that one may visit for the very first time that are both breath taking and awe-inspiring and yet bring with them an overwhelming sense of familiarity and deja vu. A sense of home or comfort like no other that warms you to the core yet is quite baffling and frankly chilling at the same time. Could these feelings be bridges to past lives, past places or are they simply glue to the events in this life as we fumble our way to do, see, and accomplish all that lies within our path of destiny and / or co-creation? Were we shown our path before we started out on it and thus are recalling fragments of that viewing which result in these momentary connections in our minds that seem to defy logic and understanding? For me, these universal glimpses represent assurances that there is something much greater than ourselves at work.
How I Found Home...
I first met My Dearest late one evening at a very familiar place, one that I had been to many times but no matter my familiarity with the surrounds, I could have never been prepared for the energy that overtook me when she walked by. Never in my entire life have I felt so drawn to someone. Moving to a place in the room where I could have the advantage of observe her dance without being caught, I literally remembered saying to myself "I could marry her". I watched her for about a half an hour (okay maybe a little longer)...beauty, familiarity, comfort, home kept ringing through my mind...so much so that I couldn't chance her leaving without my saying something to her. So I took a deep breath, walked up to her on the dance floor and told her that she was amazing before muttering my name and then walking out to head home, but yet somehow knowing that we would again see one another. We didn't have conversation beyond "You are amazing" and "Thanks", no exchange of numbers, no promise to meet again...
Have we tried this before but failed the test and are now re-learning to get it right? Why was she home from the moment I saw her? I just know that she is the glue in the mozaic of tiles that represent my life today and she is home. She is the only home that I know...not because we have become comfortable over time but because we were comfortable before time and before we even met. We aren't addicted to one another, we simply fit like puzzle pieces and enjoy the snugness. Through my anger and resentment I had forgotten what My Dearest means to me, what her family means to me, what our history means to me I don't want to lose the only one on this planet that absolutely captivated me from first glance.
There are places and events that one may visit for the very first time that are both breath taking and awe-inspiring and yet bring with them an overwhelming sense of familiarity and deja vu. A sense of home or comfort like no other that warms you to the core yet is quite baffling and frankly chilling at the same time. Could these feelings be bridges to past lives, past places or are they simply glue to the events in this life as we fumble our way to do, see, and accomplish all that lies within our path of destiny and / or co-creation? Were we shown our path before we started out on it and thus are recalling fragments of that viewing which result in these momentary connections in our minds that seem to defy logic and understanding? For me, these universal glimpses represent assurances that there is something much greater than ourselves at work.
How I Found Home...
I first met My Dearest late one evening at a very familiar place, one that I had been to many times but no matter my familiarity with the surrounds, I could have never been prepared for the energy that overtook me when she walked by. Never in my entire life have I felt so drawn to someone. Moving to a place in the room where I could have the advantage of observe her dance without being caught, I literally remembered saying to myself "I could marry her". I watched her for about a half an hour (okay maybe a little longer)...beauty, familiarity, comfort, home kept ringing through my mind...so much so that I couldn't chance her leaving without my saying something to her. So I took a deep breath, walked up to her on the dance floor and told her that she was amazing before muttering my name and then walking out to head home, but yet somehow knowing that we would again see one another. We didn't have conversation beyond "You are amazing" and "Thanks", no exchange of numbers, no promise to meet again...
Have we tried this before but failed the test and are now re-learning to get it right? Why was she home from the moment I saw her? I just know that she is the glue in the mozaic of tiles that represent my life today and she is home. She is the only home that I know...not because we have become comfortable over time but because we were comfortable before time and before we even met. We aren't addicted to one another, we simply fit like puzzle pieces and enjoy the snugness. Through my anger and resentment I had forgotten what My Dearest means to me, what her family means to me, what our history means to me I don't want to lose the only one on this planet that absolutely captivated me from first glance.
PERSONAL/ LOVE LETTER; SHE IS MY DEAREST
She is My Dearest because much of what I am today is a result of her being in my life and although "what I am" is not representative of my greatest potential it is she that I can work through to reach said potential; for I have chosen her to teach me these lessons and she has chosen me for the same.
She is My Dearest because she is of stunning beauty; a beauty that I am constantly reminded of in the morning when I wake up next to her and in the evenings when I arrive home. With the rawness of late, I feel naked and ill-equipped to hide from her my adoration and am reminded in this that even the worst of events are opportunities to open our eyes and see what is before us...in this case a flower of radiant colors that my eyes are sometimes blinded by.
She is My Dearest because she is the one who gave of her body, mind and soul to carry,
She is My Dearest because we can talk for hours about the current issues in our lives and when the pain becomes too overwhelming to keep a smile, we can pillowfight to the death and then fall into eachother's arms passionately before surrendering to the night.
She is My Dearest because she does support me as best that she can at any given moment and any given circumstances...and I judge her not for the times where I looked and couldn't find her because she became overwhelmed and had to hide.
She is My Dearest because her name is written all over my heart and so my heart wears those letters like a warm coat, shielding itself form the darkness and coldness in the world that would exist if she weren't around.
She is My Dearest because I love her and for all that she is and care nothing about what she is not.
She is My Dearest because she is of stunning beauty; a beauty that I am constantly reminded of in the morning when I wake up next to her and in the evenings when I arrive home. With the rawness of late, I feel naked and ill-equipped to hide from her my adoration and am reminded in this that even the worst of events are opportunities to open our eyes and see what is before us...in this case a flower of radiant colors that my eyes are sometimes blinded by.
She is My Dearest because she is the one who gave of her body, mind and soul to carry,
She is My Dearest because we can talk for hours about the current issues in our lives and when the pain becomes too overwhelming to keep a smile, we can pillowfight to the death and then fall into eachother's arms passionately before surrendering to the night.
She is My Dearest because she does support me as best that she can at any given moment and any given circumstances...and I judge her not for the times where I looked and couldn't find her because she became overwhelmed and had to hide.
She is My Dearest because her name is written all over my heart and so my heart wears those letters like a warm coat, shielding itself form the darkness and coldness in the world that would exist if she weren't around.
She is My Dearest because I love her and for all that she is and care nothing about what she is not.
PUSSY: THE SACRED CAVE---THE PUSSY
The pussy, or in Tantric terms, the yoni. The word yoni literally translated from its sanskrit origins means 'sacred cave' ~ I like that...sacred cave; a sense of which we have lost within our fast moving, goal oriented, sexual culture.
POETRY: BY YOUR UNDYING LOVE
We sit facing each other at a romantic dinner for two.
We gaze into each others eyes,
and look deep into each others souls.
For, we knew we where destined to be together
from the first time we met, it was memorable in deed.
We share a single glass of wine, from which we both sip,
as it is a symbol of our love for each other to share together.
We hold each others hands,
and proclaim our devotion to each other.
We finalize this special time together,
by a kiss that seems to last forever,
as it seems time has suddenly ceased.
For as long as the candle light is lit on the table,
we share this special time together.
PART 2
Trust me and let me lead the way
White rose pedals falling from the sky on a beautiful day
When you're vulnerable, I'll be your comfort and your strength
And when everything is perfect, know our love will never change
'Cuz I love you, I love you, I love you
My Young Forever, I will love you till my end of days
Composing poems so you know our love inspires me
to translate love to art
Emotions flow through my fingertips and echo sentiments of my heart
Cherish how your presence puts me at peace
And how beautiful you are when you sleep
The way you smile on me
And how, when I hold you, it feels like nothin' can harm you
Like I can protect you from anything 'cuz you mean the world to me
Take notice when you try a new hair style, paint your nails,
When you got a new dress,
and how every date with you is a brand new fairy-tale
Each kiss leaves me unable to speak 'cuz in your eyes all I see
Is an angel sent from heaven to save me
I go wherever you want to take me 'cuz, baby,
Your beauty transcends appearances, songs, and paintings
And so long as you want me to be your one and only
I promise, no matter where you are, I'll never leave you lonely.
No distance could ever keep us apart, no obstacle or circumstance.
You will be My Young Forever, my heart, and I love you.
Thank God we took a chance...
Trust me and let me lead the way
White rose pedals falling from the sky on a beautiful day
When you're vulnerable, I'll be your comfort and your strength
And when everything is perfect, know our love will never change
'Cuz I love you, I love you, I love you
My Young Forever, I love you till my end of days
PART 3
I am your one Protector,
And I am your safe Haven.
I am your knight in shining armor...
...your longing inspiration.
I'm ever present by your side,
As well as in your heart.
You know and feel it to be true,
Though we're so far apart.
Distance is but a word...
...a thing to overcome.
Don't worry, Love,
You'll find out soon,
That I will be your Home.
PART 4
Time passes many of us by
we dream about money, fame, wisdom,
and many think upon those requests
...we also dream about love.
To feel the touch of someone
to sense the comfort of that certain person
It's not a gift nor a wish
but it is rather- fate.
A weaving into the tapestry of time
but it is only in our mind where we search
We look and scour the world,
for that one person to love.
It's not hard,
because maybe love is within your grasp
All you have to do is reach out,
and grab the opportunity...
Love is within you,
and not to be searched for.
PART 5
My heart emerges, longing surges
through an absence of light from my window.
I will wish you unto me from the boundaries of sleep,
the edge of some reality.
Disobedient imagination, defying nations, will bring you to my side.
If only while I slumber and believe you're forever a caress away.
But soon the sun will rebel, does my heart have the guile
To ignore the trespassing light bleeding upon my eyes
I sigh, aware of my fitful trance
You were never there
PART 6
My mind is in a trance
Enveloped by unconsciousness
Your love evaporated my fears
By drinking my tears
My heart is in a trance
Enveloped by air
Oh! If only I could breathe
You into my soul
My soul is hiding from the storm
Enveloped by thunder
The sun shines from your eyes
And gives me comfort
My body is hiding from the rain
Enveloped by fear
Kiss me before I tear
Into my soul of pain
My secret is hiding from you
Enveloped by an infection
From a wound
I cannot heal
PART 7
Finally you're were you should be,
in my arms holding tight to me.
I'll never let you go,
I've waited to long, cried too much.
I have never felt like this before,
when I hold you, I want it to be forever,
I don't want to let go.
I want to protect you
from all the hurt and pain of the world
so I never have to see you sad.
I can't explain this,
I never knew I could be this happy
just by holding someone else.
I try not to cry when your in my arms,
but I can't help it,
it's a dream come true.
I can't explain my love for you,
but it's forever,
and it's what makes my tears
roll down my face whenever your in my arms.
PART 8
Once up on a time
there were two lovers
who loved each other
they would die if they
didn't have one another
they went through good
and rough times
but she was really sick
and her love she took to eternity
for him there was no reason to live
she was already dead
and the last breath she took was beside him
he asked God; why did you
take her instead of me?
why did you bring her into my life
if you were gonna take it away from me?
years passed by, he got over her
she promised to wait for him after death
and that her spirit would always be beside him
everywhere he was, she was there
every tear he cried, she would cried with him
there was nothing compared to love after death
he missed her so much
and couldn't take it anymore
it was time to move on and meet someone new
while he hugged his new lover
the spirit of his last lover died in pain
she went down her knees crying with so many memories
the last thing she ever wanted
was to separate her spirit from him
she knew it was true love
but couldn't understand
suddenly the lover notice
she was still alive on her bed
with her face full of tears and knew
it was just a DREAM!
PART 9
Never felt love 'til I fell through your eyes.
Never felt alone 'til you disappeared from my side.
Your touch alone brightend my life.
Being alone with you I'd drift to a majestic place.
Pressing your lips against mine would light my darkest nights.
With you by my side I felt unparallelled power.
Giving you soft kisses,
I felt I would devour the moisture on your body.
Gazing at your presence for a life time felt like an hour.
Able to spend part of my life with you felt like
an energy blast through my soul-
Very uplifted to know I'm with you
only to wake up & notice it wasn't true.
So much sorrow,
A tear fell down down like a waterfall crashes against rocks.
At one peace again,
I knew I would sleep for an eternity & once again meet up with you.
PART 10
The way you express yourself with such gratitude
My love for you seems to blossom at the heart
The heart so vibrant and pure
Your guidance is my eyes for you to follow
My love seems to blossom at the heart
The love you have given me I accept with an open mind
My love, you have given me strength and joy
The reason why I give you my all
Because the last thing you would do for me is make me fall
Happiness, tenderness, to our joyous times
Is all you have given me from this moment on
The tears we have cried, the moments of laughter
To the bumpy roads we have crossed
My dear, my love, life life, you are me,
And I give you me to complete you and I as one
Our minds, bodies, heart, and souls
are combined to cherish and guide from here to eternity
Each day I awaken to a new day, a new face looking before me,
a duplicate of my inner beauty that knows how I feel,
as my heart seems to blossom...
......By Your undying Love
We gaze into each others eyes,
and look deep into each others souls.
For, we knew we where destined to be together
from the first time we met, it was memorable in deed.
We share a single glass of wine, from which we both sip,
as it is a symbol of our love for each other to share together.
We hold each others hands,
and proclaim our devotion to each other.
We finalize this special time together,
by a kiss that seems to last forever,
as it seems time has suddenly ceased.
For as long as the candle light is lit on the table,
we share this special time together.
PART 2
Trust me and let me lead the way
White rose pedals falling from the sky on a beautiful day
When you're vulnerable, I'll be your comfort and your strength
And when everything is perfect, know our love will never change
'Cuz I love you, I love you, I love you
My Young Forever, I will love you till my end of days
Composing poems so you know our love inspires me
to translate love to art
Emotions flow through my fingertips and echo sentiments of my heart
Cherish how your presence puts me at peace
And how beautiful you are when you sleep
The way you smile on me
And how, when I hold you, it feels like nothin' can harm you
Like I can protect you from anything 'cuz you mean the world to me
Take notice when you try a new hair style, paint your nails,
When you got a new dress,
and how every date with you is a brand new fairy-tale
Each kiss leaves me unable to speak 'cuz in your eyes all I see
Is an angel sent from heaven to save me
I go wherever you want to take me 'cuz, baby,
Your beauty transcends appearances, songs, and paintings
And so long as you want me to be your one and only
I promise, no matter where you are, I'll never leave you lonely.
No distance could ever keep us apart, no obstacle or circumstance.
You will be My Young Forever, my heart, and I love you.
Thank God we took a chance...
Trust me and let me lead the way
White rose pedals falling from the sky on a beautiful day
When you're vulnerable, I'll be your comfort and your strength
And when everything is perfect, know our love will never change
'Cuz I love you, I love you, I love you
My Young Forever, I love you till my end of days
PART 3
I am your one Protector,
And I am your safe Haven.
I am your knight in shining armor...
...your longing inspiration.
I'm ever present by your side,
As well as in your heart.
You know and feel it to be true,
Though we're so far apart.
Distance is but a word...
...a thing to overcome.
Don't worry, Love,
You'll find out soon,
That I will be your Home.
PART 4
Time passes many of us by
we dream about money, fame, wisdom,
and many think upon those requests
...we also dream about love.
To feel the touch of someone
to sense the comfort of that certain person
It's not a gift nor a wish
but it is rather- fate.
A weaving into the tapestry of time
but it is only in our mind where we search
We look and scour the world,
for that one person to love.
It's not hard,
because maybe love is within your grasp
All you have to do is reach out,
and grab the opportunity...
Love is within you,
and not to be searched for.
PART 5
My heart emerges, longing surges
through an absence of light from my window.
I will wish you unto me from the boundaries of sleep,
the edge of some reality.
Disobedient imagination, defying nations, will bring you to my side.
If only while I slumber and believe you're forever a caress away.
But soon the sun will rebel, does my heart have the guile
To ignore the trespassing light bleeding upon my eyes
I sigh, aware of my fitful trance
You were never there
PART 6
My mind is in a trance
Enveloped by unconsciousness
Your love evaporated my fears
By drinking my tears
My heart is in a trance
Enveloped by air
Oh! If only I could breathe
You into my soul
My soul is hiding from the storm
Enveloped by thunder
The sun shines from your eyes
And gives me comfort
My body is hiding from the rain
Enveloped by fear
Kiss me before I tear
Into my soul of pain
My secret is hiding from you
Enveloped by an infection
From a wound
I cannot heal
PART 7
Finally you're were you should be,
in my arms holding tight to me.
I'll never let you go,
I've waited to long, cried too much.
I have never felt like this before,
when I hold you, I want it to be forever,
I don't want to let go.
I want to protect you
from all the hurt and pain of the world
so I never have to see you sad.
I can't explain this,
I never knew I could be this happy
just by holding someone else.
I try not to cry when your in my arms,
but I can't help it,
it's a dream come true.
I can't explain my love for you,
but it's forever,
and it's what makes my tears
roll down my face whenever your in my arms.
PART 8
Once up on a time
there were two lovers
who loved each other
they would die if they
didn't have one another
they went through good
and rough times
but she was really sick
and her love she took to eternity
for him there was no reason to live
she was already dead
and the last breath she took was beside him
he asked God; why did you
take her instead of me?
why did you bring her into my life
if you were gonna take it away from me?
years passed by, he got over her
she promised to wait for him after death
and that her spirit would always be beside him
everywhere he was, she was there
every tear he cried, she would cried with him
there was nothing compared to love after death
he missed her so much
and couldn't take it anymore
it was time to move on and meet someone new
while he hugged his new lover
the spirit of his last lover died in pain
she went down her knees crying with so many memories
the last thing she ever wanted
was to separate her spirit from him
she knew it was true love
but couldn't understand
suddenly the lover notice
she was still alive on her bed
with her face full of tears and knew
it was just a DREAM!
PART 9
Never felt love 'til I fell through your eyes.
Never felt alone 'til you disappeared from my side.
Your touch alone brightend my life.
Being alone with you I'd drift to a majestic place.
Pressing your lips against mine would light my darkest nights.
With you by my side I felt unparallelled power.
Giving you soft kisses,
I felt I would devour the moisture on your body.
Gazing at your presence for a life time felt like an hour.
Able to spend part of my life with you felt like
an energy blast through my soul-
Very uplifted to know I'm with you
only to wake up & notice it wasn't true.
So much sorrow,
A tear fell down down like a waterfall crashes against rocks.
At one peace again,
I knew I would sleep for an eternity & once again meet up with you.
PART 10
The way you express yourself with such gratitude
My love for you seems to blossom at the heart
The heart so vibrant and pure
Your guidance is my eyes for you to follow
My love seems to blossom at the heart
The love you have given me I accept with an open mind
My love, you have given me strength and joy
The reason why I give you my all
Because the last thing you would do for me is make me fall
Happiness, tenderness, to our joyous times
Is all you have given me from this moment on
The tears we have cried, the moments of laughter
To the bumpy roads we have crossed
My dear, my love, life life, you are me,
And I give you me to complete you and I as one
Our minds, bodies, heart, and souls
are combined to cherish and guide from here to eternity
Each day I awaken to a new day, a new face looking before me,
a duplicate of my inner beauty that knows how I feel,
as my heart seems to blossom...
......By Your undying Love
ARTICLES: THE SCAM OF MOVIES
Here’s a basic example of Hollywood Accounting: A studio makes a movie. The studio distributes the movie itself, and although the distributor is technically a separate company, they both belong to the same parent company. Also, the distribution arm sets whatever fees it wants. If they want to charge themselves eleventy quintillion dollars for distribution, they totally can. Then, even if the film earns billions of dollars in box office receipts, they’re still technically in debt (to themselves) and thus haven’t turned a profit.
Sound ridiculous? It happens all the freaking time. David Prowse, the guy who was in the Darth Vader costume in the original trilogy of Star Wars (before being ousted by that douche Hayden Christensen in the special edition) has never been paid for Return of the Jedi because it hasn’t turned a profit after nearly 30 years. That’s after dozens of home video and theatrical re-releases. (All the merchandising money goes to Lucas directly, of course.)
Similarly, someone leaked Warner Bros.’ accounting sheet for Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix onto the internet, showing that the film that had grossed about $1 billion worldwide had lost $167 million on paper.
Winston Groom, the writer of Forrest Gump was told that the film based on his work wasn’t profitable. Of course, he got the last laugh when they came to him asking if they could turn the sequel, Gump and Co. into a film as well, and he reportedly told them, ”I cannot, in good conscience, allow money to be wasted on a failure.” In other words, “Go fuck yourself.”
And then there’s Art Buchwald, whose spec script got stolen by Paramount (remember that, it’s going to come up later), and got turned into Coming to America. When he took them to court and sued for a percentage of the profit, Paramount was totally cool with it, because according to their books, it hadn’t made any kind of profit, so they didn’t owe him one red fucking cent. The judge later ruled that it was “unconscionable” for Paramount not to pay Buchwald something in a settlement. Otherwise, he’d have to ask Paramount to open their books for the courts to review. Paramount quickly backed down and settled with Buchwald instead.
Sound ridiculous? It happens all the freaking time. David Prowse, the guy who was in the Darth Vader costume in the original trilogy of Star Wars (before being ousted by that douche Hayden Christensen in the special edition) has never been paid for Return of the Jedi because it hasn’t turned a profit after nearly 30 years. That’s after dozens of home video and theatrical re-releases. (All the merchandising money goes to Lucas directly, of course.)
Similarly, someone leaked Warner Bros.’ accounting sheet for Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix onto the internet, showing that the film that had grossed about $1 billion worldwide had lost $167 million on paper.
Winston Groom, the writer of Forrest Gump was told that the film based on his work wasn’t profitable. Of course, he got the last laugh when they came to him asking if they could turn the sequel, Gump and Co. into a film as well, and he reportedly told them, ”I cannot, in good conscience, allow money to be wasted on a failure.” In other words, “Go fuck yourself.”
And then there’s Art Buchwald, whose spec script got stolen by Paramount (remember that, it’s going to come up later), and got turned into Coming to America. When he took them to court and sued for a percentage of the profit, Paramount was totally cool with it, because according to their books, it hadn’t made any kind of profit, so they didn’t owe him one red fucking cent. The judge later ruled that it was “unconscionable” for Paramount not to pay Buchwald something in a settlement. Otherwise, he’d have to ask Paramount to open their books for the courts to review. Paramount quickly backed down and settled with Buchwald instead.
Thursday, August 2, 2012
LOVE/ THOUGHTS: STANDING UP FOR ALL MEN
Someone along the line, men's wants and needs have seemingly become irrelevant.It is as if we are supposed to fill those roles of protector and provider without complaint. Men's interests and needs are always at a backseat, if salient at all. We're supposed to be happy being fem-serfs (although so many women incessantly seem to be happy at being unhappy) and not place our happiness first. A man that does strive to carve is own path is somehow seen from anything to useless or a pariah. He's a narcissistic jerk even if he's not intentionally harming someone else. Shame and even vile contempt are often heaped upon men who break ranks and even question
Most men---myself included---grew up with an idealized conception of what their mate was going to be like. And had their hopes dashed and crushed again and again. By leading men down the primrose path and not providing them with a grounded sense of realism and what women can be like is anything from naive to irresponsible. There are quite a good percentage of them that are reproductive opportunists; even irrational self-interest in a woman is still self-interest. Men who are practicing rational self-interested are often viewed as selfish misogynists; a woman doing the same is pragmatic and smart.
For the longest time, I pined for my own Kate Beckinsale, a woman who possessed a set of qualities so many women profess they generally have without feeling a need to demonstrate them very much. Even those who are not starry-eyed dreamers will wax that if I don't believe in it somehow, it will never happen no matter what the odds.
Trouble is, I actually did believe I had a soulmate that would fulfill my desire for a deep companionship. It took some doing, but after a time I awoke from that dream. I cannot tell you enough how painful and even traumatic it was in the process---I made it on the other side, although I'm not entirely unscathed.
Even seeking the equivalent in a mate is exceedingly difficult as a realist; and as a man you are typically blamed if you don't attract the right women---even if you avoid the bad and walking damaged for a legitimate female cohort.
Men desire to be with women, and despite the fact women have a level of desire for men, the malignant maze that is erected in order to obtain affection could make one question why men have to "earn" something women just should receive bountifully because of their gender. Men have been subjected to such misandry to view themselves as lesser than women, and that will be never be good enough for what Warren Farrell dubbed as the "genetic celebrity." And Ameriskanks believe that they are that genetic celebrity by simple virtue of their vagina, even though very few will look remotely like Monica Bellucci when they are her age.
Not that I don't think about it time and again. When I was a teen and a hopeless romantic, I found even then that one could cry to the heavens for love and receive nothing. Now that I'm a doer more than a dreamer, the shine that our culture regards the feminine mystique has turned lackluster.
It's also been said that men don't just look for relationships just for sex. Some do, but many are looking for that very love, respect, comfort, and admiration that just doesn't seem to be happening so much. If you are a sensitive man and long to show yourself openly, flaws and all, expecting kindness and warmth in the arms of a woman is a mistake; you are going to eventually have a rude awakening. Not to mention that a really sensitive man would be upset at continued mistreatment and the experience that he is not on par with the woman he is interacting with. Most woman cannot possibly have this because she must have the upper hand no matter how she would be resentful of a man that isn't the leader. Hence their cognitive dissonance concerning men; despite being attracted to alpha traits, they disapprove of men taking the lead because of feminism and perceived "inequality." But a man that will acquiesce is a doormat, a pushover. A dull beta male.
As a youth, there was a period where I found little solace in many things and would have given a welcome relief if a young woman had been even mildly supportive. I let that go by the wayside even with a couple of serious relationships. Despite what anyone has told you, woman despise "weakness" (i.e. kindness and empathy) in men because it would mean that they would have to see us as truly human beings rather than woman second class citizens. Or worse. One could argue it is an extension of an s own self-loathing; treating a man has fully human and a deep well would mean that perhaps her vain illusion of her own superiority (in a culture that constantly polishes her bloated ego) would shatter . . . and she would have to re-evaluate her own self-worth and deal with her inner anger.
Most men---myself included---grew up with an idealized conception of what their mate was going to be like. And had their hopes dashed and crushed again and again. By leading men down the primrose path and not providing them with a grounded sense of realism and what women can be like is anything from naive to irresponsible. There are quite a good percentage of them that are reproductive opportunists; even irrational self-interest in a woman is still self-interest. Men who are practicing rational self-interested are often viewed as selfish misogynists; a woman doing the same is pragmatic and smart.
For the longest time, I pined for my own Kate Beckinsale, a woman who possessed a set of qualities so many women profess they generally have without feeling a need to demonstrate them very much. Even those who are not starry-eyed dreamers will wax that if I don't believe in it somehow, it will never happen no matter what the odds.
Trouble is, I actually did believe I had a soulmate that would fulfill my desire for a deep companionship. It took some doing, but after a time I awoke from that dream. I cannot tell you enough how painful and even traumatic it was in the process---I made it on the other side, although I'm not entirely unscathed.
Even seeking the equivalent in a mate is exceedingly difficult as a realist; and as a man you are typically blamed if you don't attract the right women---even if you avoid the bad and walking damaged for a legitimate female cohort.
Men desire to be with women, and despite the fact women have a level of desire for men, the malignant maze that is erected in order to obtain affection could make one question why men have to "earn" something women just should receive bountifully because of their gender. Men have been subjected to such misandry to view themselves as lesser than women, and that will be never be good enough for what Warren Farrell dubbed as the "genetic celebrity." And Ameriskanks believe that they are that genetic celebrity by simple virtue of their vagina, even though very few will look remotely like Monica Bellucci when they are her age.
Not that I don't think about it time and again. When I was a teen and a hopeless romantic, I found even then that one could cry to the heavens for love and receive nothing. Now that I'm a doer more than a dreamer, the shine that our culture regards the feminine mystique has turned lackluster.
It's also been said that men don't just look for relationships just for sex. Some do, but many are looking for that very love, respect, comfort, and admiration that just doesn't seem to be happening so much. If you are a sensitive man and long to show yourself openly, flaws and all, expecting kindness and warmth in the arms of a woman is a mistake; you are going to eventually have a rude awakening. Not to mention that a really sensitive man would be upset at continued mistreatment and the experience that he is not on par with the woman he is interacting with. Most woman cannot possibly have this because she must have the upper hand no matter how she would be resentful of a man that isn't the leader. Hence their cognitive dissonance concerning men; despite being attracted to alpha traits, they disapprove of men taking the lead because of feminism and perceived "inequality." But a man that will acquiesce is a doormat, a pushover. A dull beta male.
As a youth, there was a period where I found little solace in many things and would have given a welcome relief if a young woman had been even mildly supportive. I let that go by the wayside even with a couple of serious relationships. Despite what anyone has told you, woman despise "weakness" (i.e. kindness and empathy) in men because it would mean that they would have to see us as truly human beings rather than woman second class citizens. Or worse. One could argue it is an extension of an s own self-loathing; treating a man has fully human and a deep well would mean that perhaps her vain illusion of her own superiority (in a culture that constantly polishes her bloated ego) would shatter . . . and she would have to re-evaluate her own self-worth and deal with her inner anger.
PERSONAL/ LOVE LETTER: MY DEAREST LOVE
My dearest Love,
Today the sun has graced me with its presence and upon my waking, you my love have graced my thoughts. Surrounded by elegant tall grass I am convinced that the wild is beauty. Each blade sways to the song of this wind, validating its very own existence. Perhaps one day I will be a single blade of tall grass, wild and free, dancing to the song of your wind that kisses my being. To be one with nature is to love, and to me...to be one with nature is to be one with you, giving birth to a dissipation of the thousands of miles between us.
If only I was capable of grasping this single moment, keeping it present always, safe in the right palm of my hand, holding the lines of my life. From my palm to my heart you grow to become closer to my being. Never forgetting that which you define yourself to be, and I never altering mind. Together simply, living as that of the single blade of tall grass, wild and free, dancing to the wind's song.
Today the sun has graced me with its presence and upon my waking, you my love have graced my thoughts. Surrounded by elegant tall grass I am convinced that the wild is beauty. Each blade sways to the song of this wind, validating its very own existence. Perhaps one day I will be a single blade of tall grass, wild and free, dancing to the song of your wind that kisses my being. To be one with nature is to love, and to me...to be one with nature is to be one with you, giving birth to a dissipation of the thousands of miles between us.
If only I was capable of grasping this single moment, keeping it present always, safe in the right palm of my hand, holding the lines of my life. From my palm to my heart you grow to become closer to my being. Never forgetting that which you define yourself to be, and I never altering mind. Together simply, living as that of the single blade of tall grass, wild and free, dancing to the wind's song.
PERSONAL/ LOVE LETTER:THE WIND
When one throws caution to the wind, does one then consider its travels beyond just that? For the wind must lift this caution, carry this caution to yet another destination as pollen from a single spring flower...I wonder where my caution lies at this very moment. I suppose my caution grows to become one with the wind, a placelessness being, always in motion...
Your voice was gently carried by the wings of the wind on this early September morning. It snuck through the cracks of my bay window, making the curtains dance. My ears have never heard such a lovely melody as it frolicked in and out of the dusty corners of the room until there it stood, vulnerably, in the center of all.
It was nothing I could see, nor was it tangible, but the feeling...the feeling was unexplainable...
Your voice was gently carried by the wings of the wind on this early September morning. It snuck through the cracks of my bay window, making the curtains dance. My ears have never heard such a lovely melody as it frolicked in and out of the dusty corners of the room until there it stood, vulnerably, in the center of all.
It was nothing I could see, nor was it tangible, but the feeling...the feeling was unexplainable...
PERSONAL/ LOVE LETTER:THE UNBEARABLE BEING
The silence in this house is growing quite unbearable, the dinner table untouched. I crave noise, I crave life, but fear there is no sense in uttering this desire upon deaf ears. I, of all people, how did I suddenly become so lost? The entirety of my life I have worked, worked towards achieving a goal, a goal of which I saw so clearly in the distance. Somehow, now that the once distant is in close proximity, I have become ostracized in a vast desert of desolation. Once independent, loving and contempt now only a soulless body with a muted scream for help, not even the walls can hear.
My only dream is to do whatever my heart wishes, experience freedom which no one dare to oblige. I wish to ride upon the dust of a shooting star, and rest along side of a soothing river, at times gliding gently over various pebbles, all shapes and sizes. For today, my silenced thoughts serve as a bridle for this foreseen fight.
I roll over to see you on the other side of me, sharing my bed, but not my dreams. Do you ever dream of me? For I never seem to dream of thee. The rate of my heartbeat increases with the slight movement of you, I fear your awakening. I fear the expectations that coincide with your consciousness…the expectation of me loving you, whole heartedly. Your body shifts again, in anxiety I clench my eyes with haste and pretend to be asleep.
Not even laying here, ‘asleep’ do you leave me alone? The touch of your hands on my back, hair and face send me into rage. Is it too much to ask to be left alone…? For once, I ask of you to take me into consideration, more so take me into consideration at a higher level than that of your own wants and desires. I am a person, it seems you have forgotten…and I, much like you, although silenced have wants and desires—to leave, to break free from this suffocating life. Perhaps if I just concentrate on my breathing I will succeed in suppressing my anxious thoughts…yes this is what I shall do…concentrate on my breathing. Just breathe…
How horrible it is, time moves so slowly when we are together, can’ t it learn to speed up as it does when I am in solitude? There is nothing that I want more than my old life back, my old self…my dreams of traveling and growing whole. For I do not have any recollection. It was only a couple of year ago that I decided I never truly wanted to settle in one place for a long amount of time but, saw myself to be much more contempt moving from place to place. My dream in life was to learn the art of talking less and listening more; taking less and giving more; and possessing less and learning more. I wanted to see how I could exist on my own, away from the security of friends, family and work and the already established identity that I myself possessed—I wished to start anew. I wanted to learn the lesson of how to stop rushing from place to place, always looking ahead to the next thing, while in the moment, in front of me; I had allowed the present to slip away unnoticed. After all, in the end, a life is nothing more than the accumulation of small daily moments…and yet I sit motionless, with closed eyes—not able to travel and explore the hidden treasures of life beyond the suffocating walls of this love and empty room in which we live.
..
I do not recall ever remaining so motionless ever before, watching her I have been since the moment I entered the room this morning and now the moon is my visitor in place of the sun. ..her skin in the moonlight is so fresh and bright. I believe she stirred! Oh my love, please open your eyes please, please open your unclouded brown, almond shaped eyes….reassure me of my existence.
Your lips, your lush lips, they are parting, speak my name, utter my name…I am here…
Oh, the feeling my heart has just felt is that of a thousand ‘I love you’s’…I cannot begin to explain how relieved I feel….
“Yes, my love it is I, I am here, forever and always”
My words must have comforted her for she is breathing with depth, her chest gingerly raises and falls as that of the autumn sky once more.
I can’t not survive like this any longer, I must go”
This cannot be so, she loves me, we are going to be one for eternity, it was my destiny, no not was, why am I speaking in past tense as though it has ended? We are still in love…right?
“Please I…I…I do not love you any longer, you must go, if you love me you will do so…”
Although I cannot breathe I feel I must leave. I will leave only because of the love I hold for her. My knees weak, I rise slowly as a flower in bloom, I shall not cry, I shall simply leave. I love you my please know and remember that as true, forever and always. With the drop of a hat I will return, and we shall be one, once more, this time for all of life.
Since the morning I collapsed I have been able to live life, each and every moment of it. I breathe and laugh and love, love myself. I love this spot that I come to…although it makes me miss the one I was once with… She is not with my in presence, yet in my mind she still exists. Perhaps now that we do not share a bed, she does share my dreams…There is nothing more that I love than this single letter, a letter, with which I never sent a reply…just as our love was—a one way street…
“My dear love, I am along the shore waiting for you to take my eager hands. For now I have a better sense of when not to go in too deep, for the current rips out and storms may come. Waiting and missing, missing and longing, existing without you is baneful. Perhaps the agony will bring me the gift of life, the ability to re-establish who I am and who we were. Turning away the distractions, preventing interference, a break is just what I needed—I am ready to wade in the water with you again when you are…”
If I was to have replied…I would have sent you this, but what is the sense…? I will sit here and write, write to you and with me I shall always keep it….
With one string of words you claim your love, yet with another you prove your abhorrence—beside me uninterested, yet at a far, adoration. Is your wish to force me into insanity?
As I rest on this rock with many faces, my eyes are drawn to the newly developed tree line. There is something special about the way the sunlight dances among the entanglement of tree branches, as if dodging the complexity of darkness. It is funny how I compare thee to the dancing rays, avoiding me, avoiding us, avoiding our love. Even still I hear thee in the whist melody of two birds perched, complacent, on the weather worn branch of a white birch tree. I feel thee in the river’s mist, three hundred feet below, roaring with such power the angels above me, above the trees, and above the clouds listen. This scent, the blend of verdant cedar and newly born leaves permeate the air triggering a memory. I can’t help but think of thee. Do you recall this day as I; walking in a vast but delicate field, blanketed by flowers of wilderness and emotions of the heart. With the breeze came a trail of endless dreams rolling through our minds, as ocean waves upon the shore. Faced the decision of remaining hidden, still, together or penetrate the surface of the outside world. We chose to stay, beneath the shelter of a single tree, with the company of one another. With the sunrise, reality grimly knocked, welcoming our return. I have relegated my thoughts of you to the farthest reaches of my heart; banished forever—but not forgotten. No, never forgotten for with the presence of nature, every word, thought, every look and feeling that passed between us, is as fresh in my mind now, as if it had occurred only yesterday. Like the moss growing atop the base of this rock, you span the surface of my mind. In this moment I tell myself to keep breathing, but how difficult this simple task becomes with the lack of air. Among the oxygen of a forest, the thoughts of us suffocates the atmosphere…until I break free from your hold, I rest on this rock with many faces.
I have never met a more perfect woman for me…so loyal and true. Such elegance she possesses in everything she does. I love the way her mouth turns up around the edges when she is excited, the way she inhales deeply with such delicacy that her chest slowly raises and falls like the autumn sun in the sky. Her skin, so soft and pure, with a one of a kind glow similar to that of the light surrounding an angel’s halo. Although she lays in slumber her unclouded brown, almond shaped eyes remain permanent in my mind. The way her name rolls of my tongue s a wave right before it crashes to the surface of the sun kissed sand. There is not a more beautiful woman alive, and this I know is true.
I know this is the delicate flower I am destined to be with for eternity, my love, my best friend, my wife….
Can’t you just imagine her standing on a beach in a simple white dress, as simple as the beauty she holds, cognac brown tresses draping the cream complexion of her perfectly sculpted back? I can, I can see it all, envision every detail…this is my favorite moment of today, laying beside the one I love, watching, and memorizing each attribute that makes her the person she is. Perfect in every way. Perhaps today I will take the day off from work to spend every moment with my love that I possible. To be as one, from dawn to dusk…that is my dream for today. And in this moment I am complete.
My only dream is to do whatever my heart wishes, experience freedom which no one dare to oblige. I wish to ride upon the dust of a shooting star, and rest along side of a soothing river, at times gliding gently over various pebbles, all shapes and sizes. For today, my silenced thoughts serve as a bridle for this foreseen fight.
I roll over to see you on the other side of me, sharing my bed, but not my dreams. Do you ever dream of me? For I never seem to dream of thee. The rate of my heartbeat increases with the slight movement of you, I fear your awakening. I fear the expectations that coincide with your consciousness…the expectation of me loving you, whole heartedly. Your body shifts again, in anxiety I clench my eyes with haste and pretend to be asleep.
Not even laying here, ‘asleep’ do you leave me alone? The touch of your hands on my back, hair and face send me into rage. Is it too much to ask to be left alone…? For once, I ask of you to take me into consideration, more so take me into consideration at a higher level than that of your own wants and desires. I am a person, it seems you have forgotten…and I, much like you, although silenced have wants and desires—to leave, to break free from this suffocating life. Perhaps if I just concentrate on my breathing I will succeed in suppressing my anxious thoughts…yes this is what I shall do…concentrate on my breathing. Just breathe…
How horrible it is, time moves so slowly when we are together, can’ t it learn to speed up as it does when I am in solitude? There is nothing that I want more than my old life back, my old self…my dreams of traveling and growing whole. For I do not have any recollection. It was only a couple of year ago that I decided I never truly wanted to settle in one place for a long amount of time but, saw myself to be much more contempt moving from place to place. My dream in life was to learn the art of talking less and listening more; taking less and giving more; and possessing less and learning more. I wanted to see how I could exist on my own, away from the security of friends, family and work and the already established identity that I myself possessed—I wished to start anew. I wanted to learn the lesson of how to stop rushing from place to place, always looking ahead to the next thing, while in the moment, in front of me; I had allowed the present to slip away unnoticed. After all, in the end, a life is nothing more than the accumulation of small daily moments…and yet I sit motionless, with closed eyes—not able to travel and explore the hidden treasures of life beyond the suffocating walls of this love and empty room in which we live.
..
I do not recall ever remaining so motionless ever before, watching her I have been since the moment I entered the room this morning and now the moon is my visitor in place of the sun. ..her skin in the moonlight is so fresh and bright. I believe she stirred! Oh my love, please open your eyes please, please open your unclouded brown, almond shaped eyes….reassure me of my existence.
Your lips, your lush lips, they are parting, speak my name, utter my name…I am here…
Oh, the feeling my heart has just felt is that of a thousand ‘I love you’s’…I cannot begin to explain how relieved I feel….
“Yes, my love it is I, I am here, forever and always”
My words must have comforted her for she is breathing with depth, her chest gingerly raises and falls as that of the autumn sky once more.
I can’t not survive like this any longer, I must go”
This cannot be so, she loves me, we are going to be one for eternity, it was my destiny, no not was, why am I speaking in past tense as though it has ended? We are still in love…right?
“Please I…I…I do not love you any longer, you must go, if you love me you will do so…”
Although I cannot breathe I feel I must leave. I will leave only because of the love I hold for her. My knees weak, I rise slowly as a flower in bloom, I shall not cry, I shall simply leave. I love you my please know and remember that as true, forever and always. With the drop of a hat I will return, and we shall be one, once more, this time for all of life.
Since the morning I collapsed I have been able to live life, each and every moment of it. I breathe and laugh and love, love myself. I love this spot that I come to…although it makes me miss the one I was once with… She is not with my in presence, yet in my mind she still exists. Perhaps now that we do not share a bed, she does share my dreams…There is nothing more that I love than this single letter, a letter, with which I never sent a reply…just as our love was—a one way street…
“My dear love, I am along the shore waiting for you to take my eager hands. For now I have a better sense of when not to go in too deep, for the current rips out and storms may come. Waiting and missing, missing and longing, existing without you is baneful. Perhaps the agony will bring me the gift of life, the ability to re-establish who I am and who we were. Turning away the distractions, preventing interference, a break is just what I needed—I am ready to wade in the water with you again when you are…”
If I was to have replied…I would have sent you this, but what is the sense…? I will sit here and write, write to you and with me I shall always keep it….
With one string of words you claim your love, yet with another you prove your abhorrence—beside me uninterested, yet at a far, adoration. Is your wish to force me into insanity?
As I rest on this rock with many faces, my eyes are drawn to the newly developed tree line. There is something special about the way the sunlight dances among the entanglement of tree branches, as if dodging the complexity of darkness. It is funny how I compare thee to the dancing rays, avoiding me, avoiding us, avoiding our love. Even still I hear thee in the whist melody of two birds perched, complacent, on the weather worn branch of a white birch tree. I feel thee in the river’s mist, three hundred feet below, roaring with such power the angels above me, above the trees, and above the clouds listen. This scent, the blend of verdant cedar and newly born leaves permeate the air triggering a memory. I can’t help but think of thee. Do you recall this day as I; walking in a vast but delicate field, blanketed by flowers of wilderness and emotions of the heart. With the breeze came a trail of endless dreams rolling through our minds, as ocean waves upon the shore. Faced the decision of remaining hidden, still, together or penetrate the surface of the outside world. We chose to stay, beneath the shelter of a single tree, with the company of one another. With the sunrise, reality grimly knocked, welcoming our return. I have relegated my thoughts of you to the farthest reaches of my heart; banished forever—but not forgotten. No, never forgotten for with the presence of nature, every word, thought, every look and feeling that passed between us, is as fresh in my mind now, as if it had occurred only yesterday. Like the moss growing atop the base of this rock, you span the surface of my mind. In this moment I tell myself to keep breathing, but how difficult this simple task becomes with the lack of air. Among the oxygen of a forest, the thoughts of us suffocates the atmosphere…until I break free from your hold, I rest on this rock with many faces.
I have never met a more perfect woman for me…so loyal and true. Such elegance she possesses in everything she does. I love the way her mouth turns up around the edges when she is excited, the way she inhales deeply with such delicacy that her chest slowly raises and falls like the autumn sun in the sky. Her skin, so soft and pure, with a one of a kind glow similar to that of the light surrounding an angel’s halo. Although she lays in slumber her unclouded brown, almond shaped eyes remain permanent in my mind. The way her name rolls of my tongue s a wave right before it crashes to the surface of the sun kissed sand. There is not a more beautiful woman alive, and this I know is true.
I know this is the delicate flower I am destined to be with for eternity, my love, my best friend, my wife….
Can’t you just imagine her standing on a beach in a simple white dress, as simple as the beauty she holds, cognac brown tresses draping the cream complexion of her perfectly sculpted back? I can, I can see it all, envision every detail…this is my favorite moment of today, laying beside the one I love, watching, and memorizing each attribute that makes her the person she is. Perfect in every way. Perhaps today I will take the day off from work to spend every moment with my love that I possible. To be as one, from dawn to dusk…that is my dream for today. And in this moment I am complete.
Wednesday, August 1, 2012
PERSONAL/ LOVE LETTER: YOU
You.
Do you know how beautiful you are? Do you have any idea about the corner of the world that get's held up
because of your existence? Do you know about the brightness that is held in your every breath? Do you know what magnificence is concealed in your story? Do you know that Love wrote a letter in your bones on the day you were born, and that every moment of your life is about revealing that letter? Do you have any idea about the preciousness of your every motion? and the gifts you bestow on us when you trip and fall?
Your wins are for you, but what you GIVE from your failings, you will never know. A light exists in you that is ancient and breathless, and beyond every nuance of your mind. Yes, it shines when you smile — but it burns white-hot brilliance when you cry, because that is when you OPEN. That is when you bloom like the full phase of the moon. You are all this luminosity, and more. You are what wakes the tiger, and puts the bear to sleep. You are that raging internal curiosity that creates worlds within worlds, within worlds. You are the undoing of those worlds. The unravelling of an old tale, like a grandmothers sweater worn thin. You break through the barriers,and find the sun.
You are my heart, and my hope, and my truth that can't be taken. You change the game. You re-write the rules. You set the world on fire, and then you wash it all clean. You show up.again and again, and again, and again. You astound me in your forgetting, and remembering. You plant the seeds, and bring the soil.
What I really want to say…is how you move me. And this moving is a sharing that rocks this wicked world.
this beautiful world, that we like to call wicked, because we've forgotten that it is only Us in disguise. What I really want to say, is that you knock my socks off. and that I smile for the day that we all stop pretending
we don't know each other, and love each other, and meet in the middle with a warm embrace —laughing with abandon over the wild and woolen wonder of this fastly fading dream.
Do you know how beautiful you are? Do you have any idea about the corner of the world that get's held up
because of your existence? Do you know about the brightness that is held in your every breath? Do you know what magnificence is concealed in your story? Do you know that Love wrote a letter in your bones on the day you were born, and that every moment of your life is about revealing that letter? Do you have any idea about the preciousness of your every motion? and the gifts you bestow on us when you trip and fall?
Your wins are for you, but what you GIVE from your failings, you will never know. A light exists in you that is ancient and breathless, and beyond every nuance of your mind. Yes, it shines when you smile — but it burns white-hot brilliance when you cry, because that is when you OPEN. That is when you bloom like the full phase of the moon. You are all this luminosity, and more. You are what wakes the tiger, and puts the bear to sleep. You are that raging internal curiosity that creates worlds within worlds, within worlds. You are the undoing of those worlds. The unravelling of an old tale, like a grandmothers sweater worn thin. You break through the barriers,and find the sun.
You are my heart, and my hope, and my truth that can't be taken. You change the game. You re-write the rules. You set the world on fire, and then you wash it all clean. You show up.again and again, and again, and again. You astound me in your forgetting, and remembering. You plant the seeds, and bring the soil.
What I really want to say…is how you move me. And this moving is a sharing that rocks this wicked world.
this beautiful world, that we like to call wicked, because we've forgotten that it is only Us in disguise. What I really want to say, is that you knock my socks off. and that I smile for the day that we all stop pretending
we don't know each other, and love each other, and meet in the middle with a warm embrace —laughing with abandon over the wild and woolen wonder of this fastly fading dream.
PERSONAL/ LOVE LETTER: DEAR FUTURE WIFE
Dear Future Wife:
Sometimes I feel lost and out of touch, but when you're there, I feel safe. Your voice soothes me. I could sit here and try to tell you just how I feel, but I can't find the words other than I am ecstatic we met and have gotten together after all we've gone through.I want to tell you that the love I have for you is undying. It is a
love that is strong and enduring and will stand the test of time. I truly feel blessed that you have become a part of my life, and I cannot wait for the day that we can join our lives together. I want to lie next to you at night and fall asleep in your arms. I want to wake to your beautiful smile. I want to share in your joys and sorrows. I want to be your everything, because you are everything to me.
I promise to always love you and always hold you in my heart. I will always be here for you when you need me, and I will love you no matter what life brings us. You are my soul mate, and I vow to love you all eternity. I love you, baby.
Yours,
Sometimes I feel lost and out of touch, but when you're there, I feel safe. Your voice soothes me. I could sit here and try to tell you just how I feel, but I can't find the words other than I am ecstatic we met and have gotten together after all we've gone through.I want to tell you that the love I have for you is undying. It is a
love that is strong and enduring and will stand the test of time. I truly feel blessed that you have become a part of my life, and I cannot wait for the day that we can join our lives together. I want to lie next to you at night and fall asleep in your arms. I want to wake to your beautiful smile. I want to share in your joys and sorrows. I want to be your everything, because you are everything to me.
I promise to always love you and always hold you in my heart. I will always be here for you when you need me, and I will love you no matter what life brings us. You are my soul mate, and I vow to love you all eternity. I love you, baby.
Yours,
POETRY: YOU ARE THE BEATING OF MY HEART
You are the beating of my heart
The light of my life when it is dark
The sweet tenderness of every kiss
The heavenly ecstacy and tender bliss
You are the desire which burns inside
The love in my heart I can not hide
The essence of every breath I take
The hope of every wish I make
You are the burning fire in my soul
The warmth when I have you to hold
The tenderness when I feel your embrace
The devine beauty and heavenly grace
You are the trembling of my fingertips
The beautiful passion when I kiss your lips
The excitement in my heart you inspire
The fulfillment of every need and desire
You are the ecstacy of a love so divine
The bliss and beauty as endless as time
The belief in every prayer I say
The love in my heart forever to stay
You are...the true love...of my heart and soul
2
You make me want to take the plunge,
To let go of my fears,
To hand over my heart to you,
And rid my life of tears.
You make me want to change myself,
Into the man of your dreams,
To makeover each little flaw,
Become more than I seem.
You make me want to love again,
Submerge myself in you,
To give up inhibition,
And start over anew.
You make me want to reach new heights,
To set you as my goal,
To believe you are the only one,
Who can make my spirit whole.
You make me want to trust my heart,
Forget the hurts of past,
To know I shouldn't be afraid -
Have faith that this will last.
You make me want to hold on tight,
Rely on what's to come,
To know that you are there for me,
That you could be the one?.
You make me want to find myself,
To see me in your eyes,
But I'm so afraid to fall again;
So used to sad goodbyes.
You make me want to reach inside,
Expose the love in me,
To give you everything I have,
For all eternity.
You make me want to open up,
Let go of all the bad.
You make me want to find in you,
The love I've never had.
3
A gentle touch,
a sweet soft embrace of loving
Caring in the ways of heavenly
direction
Two lovers on a path,
to discover truth
In true love
A calmness,
like an ocean at rest
Minds relaxed
in the knowledge of togetherness
No demands, no expectations
Just loving in the caring way
One for the other
In the touch of hands
And soft lips,
so gently speaking caresses
Here is the calmness
of true love
The excitement, anticipation
of loving
Always unexpectedly
Not demanding, not planning
Just being and enjoying
In the light of loving...
4
You are the sunshine, and starlight, too
You are the blue sky, and morning dew
You are the birdsong, and even moonbeams
You are my everything, in all of my dreams
You are the melody, within my heart
You are the promise, never to part
You are my heartbeat, my very breath
I promise to love you,
forever - 'til death
The light of my life when it is dark
The sweet tenderness of every kiss
The heavenly ecstacy and tender bliss
You are the desire which burns inside
The love in my heart I can not hide
The essence of every breath I take
The hope of every wish I make
You are the burning fire in my soul
The warmth when I have you to hold
The tenderness when I feel your embrace
The devine beauty and heavenly grace
You are the trembling of my fingertips
The beautiful passion when I kiss your lips
The excitement in my heart you inspire
The fulfillment of every need and desire
You are the ecstacy of a love so divine
The bliss and beauty as endless as time
The belief in every prayer I say
The love in my heart forever to stay
You are...the true love...of my heart and soul
2
You make me want to take the plunge,
To let go of my fears,
To hand over my heart to you,
And rid my life of tears.
You make me want to change myself,
Into the man of your dreams,
To makeover each little flaw,
Become more than I seem.
You make me want to love again,
Submerge myself in you,
To give up inhibition,
And start over anew.
You make me want to reach new heights,
To set you as my goal,
To believe you are the only one,
Who can make my spirit whole.
You make me want to trust my heart,
Forget the hurts of past,
To know I shouldn't be afraid -
Have faith that this will last.
You make me want to hold on tight,
Rely on what's to come,
To know that you are there for me,
That you could be the one?.
You make me want to find myself,
To see me in your eyes,
But I'm so afraid to fall again;
So used to sad goodbyes.
You make me want to reach inside,
Expose the love in me,
To give you everything I have,
For all eternity.
You make me want to open up,
Let go of all the bad.
You make me want to find in you,
The love I've never had.
3
A gentle touch,
a sweet soft embrace of loving
Caring in the ways of heavenly
direction
Two lovers on a path,
to discover truth
In true love
A calmness,
like an ocean at rest
Minds relaxed
in the knowledge of togetherness
No demands, no expectations
Just loving in the caring way
One for the other
In the touch of hands
And soft lips,
so gently speaking caresses
Here is the calmness
of true love
The excitement, anticipation
of loving
Always unexpectedly
Not demanding, not planning
Just being and enjoying
In the light of loving...
4
You are the sunshine, and starlight, too
You are the blue sky, and morning dew
You are the birdsong, and even moonbeams
You are my everything, in all of my dreams
You are the melody, within my heart
You are the promise, never to part
You are my heartbeat, my very breath
I promise to love you,
forever - 'til death
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