JOURNAL/LOVE: MOST WOMAN LIE AND BULLSHIT

In the best selling book The Four Agreements don Miguel Ruiz gives four principles to practice in order to create love and happiness in your life. The number one rule is

1. Be Impeccable with your Word: Speak with integrity.

Stephen Covey is credited with making the term "Emotional Bank Account" or EBA popular. Here is something Covey says about trust and EBA's

If you have lost someone's trust....

Examine your Emotional Bank Account with this person; it’s most likely strained because of withdrawals. Make a commitment to start making deposits that matter most to that person, and do it. Little by little, even with small deposits, you will find that the account will grow. It may take time. But over time you will find the cumulative effect of the deposits.

Covey also says "When you make consistent deposits, out of your integrity and out of your empathy.." then, "little by little you can restore trust."

When you are kind, honest, caring and friendly to another person, you make deposits on an Emotional Bank Account. However, if you are unkind, disrespectful, uncaring and mean, you draw from this account.

It is easy to take another person, a spouse or friend, a relative or anyone we deal with, for granted. Yet, the level of good will that exists in the relationship determines the well-being and ease we feel. It provides the foundation we can build on.

We don’t need money to make a deposit on the Emotional Bank Account of any relationship, and won’t feel richer if we withdraw from it. Nevertheless, it is so easy to waste and erode the level of trust by being thoughtless and critical.

Imagine, a kind word, a compliment, a smile, all add up; while putting down or blaming someone takes away.

When we have a comfortable wealth on our emotional bank account, the relationship is stable so that we can afford to have disagreements or arguments, without immediately seeing red and/or throwing the baby out with the bath-water. Conflicts can be resolved. But when our account is low or even overdrawn, the relationship is in danger. We can’t afford any more withdrawals and need to be mindful to make deposits again, so it can be salvaged and survive.


COMMON LIES WOMAN SAY TO ME:

1-I am submissive: What does submissive mean?

From the Latin word submittō, meaning to yield, submissive is an adjective that describes one who submits; one who is meekly obedient to others

Submission means to voluntarily place oneself under the authority of another.

Colossians 3:18-19 reads, "Wives, submit to your husbands, as is fitting in the Lord. Husbands, love your wives and do not be harsh with them." Ephesians 5:22-29 (excerpts) says, "Wives, submit to your husbands as to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church...(25), Husbands, love your wives just as Christ loved the church and gave Himself up for her... husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies..." (I encourage you to read the whole passage).

Being submissive, to me, means you trust the other person enough to let him take the lead (at least in some situations).

I think it is required at a level that will show enough trust to your partner, but I don't think a 100% submission would be a good thing. If you never have a say, if you don't have an opinion or you don't have a clue, then what's the whole point of you being submissive? To me, there is value in being submissive when you deliberately choose to trust your partner for the decision he is making. It means that if you see some big red flags, you'll let him know and you'll still use your free will to make decision, though it doesn't mean you'll be submissive only when you agree with him. It's a balance between a lot of things, but basically, I'd say it would be important to show this trust in situations when you wouldn't make the same decision as he does, but you still decide to trust him and follow him.

Submission is a willingness to let the husband take the lead in the home. Taking the lead means being personally responsible and accountable for the home, not being the absolute power and authority in the home like men would like it to mean. That is surrender and domination not submission. You can’t force a woman to be submissive, it is something she does willingly.

A happy wife who is loved so much by her husband will not hesitate to do anything for him and will submit to him without being constantly reminded or told.

Submissiveness on the part of women does not mean that their voice and opinion cannot be heard in the family unlike as many people assume. She has every right to make her opinion on issues know to the husband, but submission lets her support/accept her husband's decision even if it did not include her opinion most times. I for one love to listen would to my partner's view on issues before taking my stand on most issues, even if i may not completely buy into it. You never can tell, her opinion could turn out to be the best solution to the problem.


But what do I get....reisistance. Most woman say they are submissive, but are NOT. There can be only captain in a ship. If you have two captain...there will be fight for power.  A man needs to be a man.


2-I love sex

I love sex...and I love doing it all the time. When you love something....you want to be good at it. ....you want to do it all the time. But then you look at their action. It is the total opposite. You want to have sex and they don't. They barely give you a blow job....that doesn't sound like someone who loves sex. And to me...sex is the way two people become one. So don't bullshit me if you say you love sex...but don't give me access to your pussy and mouth

It suck when you are in a marriage or relationship where you get very very little sex. And maybe this is why I want to marry a bad slutty girl...because bad girls loves sex...they love having it all the time....they understand  how important it is to have it all the time...to make your man happy. They have no problem wear a short dress and no underwear and never say NO to you..OH yes..they love DICK..they love it in their mouth or pussy...and you don't have to earn it...you don't have to constantly taking them out or doing things to get that pussy or mouth



3-I live a simple life

Simple living encompasses
-reducing one's possessions or increasing self-sufficiency, for example. Simple living may be characterized by individuals being satisfied with what they need rather than want
-refraining from luxury and indulgence,

Simple living is distinct from those living in forced poverty, as it is a voluntary lifestyle choice.

What is “voluntary simplicity”? My definition is quite short: the lifelong process of choosing to live a simple life. The next part would be to define “simple”. I personally believe we all have to define that for ourselves. My choices may not match anyone else’s lifestyle choices, and that’s ok. You have to look at your values and base your choices in life on what’s right for you.

A “simple” life is not necessarily an easier life, but should be working toward a less stressful life. It’s a lifelong journey of consciously choosing the way in which you live including how you react to and interact with others, consume products, participate in relationships or end relationships, activities you participate in, and how you determine what brings you joy.

To me, simple living is to live without stress. It doesn’t mean living without any effort or labor. But to live a life devoid of the kind of complications that rob you of peace and enjoyment is to live a simple life. It is a mindset, really. A complicated life is filled with fretful thoughts and anxious activities as one tries to keep up a frantic pace, so much so that there is no time to enjoy the act of living. Sadly, many people have become so accustomed to their manic lifestyles that they don’t know the true peace and fulfillment that they are missing. They are addicted to stress like they are addicted to their morning caffeine fix, text messaging

A simple life is rich with satisfaction and rife with contentment and appreciation. Regardless of the balance in your bank account or the type of car in your garage. Or your professional or social status.

Beyond that, you define what is simple. For some of you, living without a car creates more complications and stress while for others, not having a car eliminates the costs, both financial and environmental, that weigh heavily on their conscience

To me...a simple life means being happy wherever you are. You can be at home, or in the park...or whatever. There is no need to do anything....you just need to be. There is no need to go out to dinner, go to the park, or even to the movies. You are just happy with what you have and where you are.



4- I know how to love.

So many woman tell me they love me but never showed it.  It all words to them

Number one rule of love...is they never leave you. If you love someone....you can't stand being away from them. You don't need a break or time out  They will rather die than leave you a break your heart.

Relationships are an investment. The more you put in, the more you can get back. Just like in Eddie Murphy movie-A Thousand Words.....Show them—don't just tell them—how much they mean to you.

The quality of the relationship is a function of the extent to which it is built on a solid underlying friendship and meets the needs of the two people involved. Are you meeting your partner's needs? Are your needs being met? What are they? After you know partner's needs, if you find yourselves still frustrated, realize that it's not that you can't meet your partner's needs, it's that you won't. Think about why you haven't yet.

I listen to my partner's need. One of my partner said that I didn't take her out...since I was a home body....yet every two weeks or so...i took her for lunch, movies, park....yet it still wasn't enough for her and  I was still planing more stuff for us but everything I did wasn't enough.. Every time she got in the car, she wanted to go somewhere. When I wanted to cook for her..she still wanted to go out.

One weekend..she actually did what I wanted and we stay in and had sex all weekend...minus the oral sex..which SUCKED BIG TIME.

And you know what happens when your partner thinks that you no longer willing to give them what they need.....they  try to coerce you into caring through criticism, intimidation, shame, withdrawal, crying, anger—whatever works. This power struggle may continue for years, but it can end because of the love you have for each other.The emotional bond created by romantic love evolves into a powerful organic bond through the process of resolving conflict, One has to give in to the other but when no one wants to give it....it just continue with conflict.

It shouldn't matter why your partner needs what he or she needs.  If one of your kids got up in the middle of the night and said, "I'm thirsty," would you just turn around and say, "Well, I'm not, so go back to bed"? The key is to appreciate your partner's individuality. Don't expect your partner to react exactly as you would; your partner isn't you!

I remember one partner where I said,  "You only sucked my dick twice" (I felt rejected) she turned around and tell me.."what!!! are you counting? and...You don't even like it when I suck your dick" Ouch!!!!!!!.,,,,I will never ask anything sexual from you again. It always the same....they never listen to me....and then woman wonder why men cheat....because they don't listen..they don't care....Is that love.....NO!!!!!!!!!  To be married or in a relationship with someone who doesn't give a shit about your need...is horrible and to think you have to spend the rest of life...blowjobless is a nighmare.

Think about the message you're sending your partner when you don't acknowledge his or her wants. How does this make your partner feel? How would it make you feel? When I realized how little she thought of my needs...i wanted to do less.

As much as I like to be in control and looking for someone submissive..I always comprise. I give in and the relationship become 70- 80% percent her and 20% me....maybe that is why I need someone submissive. Because I am tired of giving in....I loved them and gave in to me....but except for like two people in my life. Everyone else want to take ..take ..take.

Listen...if a girl want to go to the movies, dinner or go out ..then why not you do all the work. Decide where to go, take me there and pay for the movie. Stop telling me what to do. I hate when someone tell me what to do....but woman are smart..they don't tell you..they make suggestion...in a question form. If that whats makes you happy..going out to dinner...then share that experience with me and you take care of all the detail.

That is what I do. I share what I like to do..but planning and paying for the whole things. That is comprise. We do what you want...and we do what i want.....not always what you want.

Know that you can fulfill your partner's wants. But by prioritizing your needs alone, you're making the conscious decision to not to fulfil his or her wants. Try talking about both of your needs and wants. Find the middle ground.

It's important to connect emotionally with your partner and communicate your needs and wants in the bedroom. Bring your emotions, desires, fantasies and inhibitions to each other, allowing you to listen to your partner's thoughts and sharing your own too. Lose the sexual and nonsexual distractions, and get down to the bare, honest truth about how pleasure is factoring into your relationships,

I remember watching the Oprah show one time and they said....you can predict how an evening with your partner will be based on the first four minutes of your time together, so make those minutes count! Bring flowers. Greet each other with a compliment. Ask questions about your partner's day. Smile; it'll make a difference.

Research shows that you must be nice to your partner to have a happy marriage. "The little things matter,...you have to do nice things often. But it's harder to be nice when the heat is on, when you're really angry or when something has happened for the 15th time. Nevertheless, the balance must be heavily, heavily stacked in the positive to have a happy marriage

You know...only one person ..ever made me breakfast in bed,
only one person ever gave me a morning blowjob
only one person got me cards on a regular basis
only one person got me gave me phone sex on a regular basis
only one person got me books

all of those things....didn't take alot of money or no money at all. This is what I am saying.

I wrote this in my other post:

There are really only two type of love. There will be some people you love because of what you get from them: what they give you, the way they make you feel. This is perhaps the majority of love the 99%—which is also what makes much of love so unstable. A person’s capacity to give is inconstant and changing. Your response to what you are given is also inconstant and changing. So if you’re chasing a feeling, you’ll always be chasing. No feeling is ever constant. If love is dependent on this, it too becomes inconstant and changing. And just like everything in this world, the more you chase it, the more it will run away from you.This is they type of relationship I had most of my life.

But, once in a while, people enter your life that you love—not for what they give you—but for what they are. The beauty you see in them is a reflection of the God, so you love them. It is easy for you to love someone. Now suddenly it isn’t about what you’re getting, but rather what you can give. This is unselfish love. This second type of love is the most rare. And if it is based in, and not competing with, the love of God, it will also bring about the most joy. To love in any other way is to need, to be dependent, to have expectations—all the ingredients for misery and disappointment.Only 1% of woman rest here.


Dr. Phil  wrote in his book...Relationship Recuse about talking with and listening to your partner, including insisting on emotional integrity and the importance of being a two-way, not a one-way, communicator. "Mean what you say and say what you mean," he says.

QUOTE: “You must put motion into your emotion. Every day, at every step along the way in your relationship, you must ask yourself, ‘Is what I’m doing and what I’m saying bringing us closer together, or pushing us further apart?’ Every day, at every step along the way, you must ask of yourself, ‘Is what I’m doing helping us thrive in new ways as a couple, or am I keeping us stuck in our old patterns?’”

I am searching for my future wife/soulmate. Please stop by again.