POETRY: YOU GUIDED ME AND GAVE ME YOUR LOVE

With you, I talk the way I long
To be able to talk to people. I
Talk and act, with you, the way
That is truly me. I don't talk
And act this way with a lot of
People, only a choice few; and
You are the most choice of
Them all. So, I want to tell you
Now: Thank you for letting me
Be myself with you and still
Loving me, even though you
Know the true me. Thank you
For not letting the fake me
Be around you but only my true
Self. I don't know how you do
It, but you do; and you still love me
At the same time.



2

he warmest shivers run down my spine when I think of you,
anticipating the look your beautiful eyes give me every time you look at me.
The happiness you've given me has melted
into my body and permeates through every inch of my skin.

My heart and soul actually smiles together for once.
Words can't even describe how happy you've made me.
I feel like this is the first time I've ever truly smiled
in my Life.

I had kept my heart locked away deep inside for a very long time,
just waiting to be released.
And I think you might be the one who can finally open it.

Your eyes don't just look at me, they see me all the way through.
Your kiss stays on my lips hours after you've kissed me.
I can still feel you there.
Your hands touch me all the way to my soul, and for once
it doesn't scare me.

Everything about you is burned in my memory for a lifetime to come.
And when we are old and gray together, I can tell our children,
I was with an incrediable man who saw me, heard me, touched me
like no other had...
one who made me smile all the way through.


3

My love..
In the beginning I was so lost
and you took my hand.
You guided me and gave me your love.

Looking back over our past
I have now come to understand
How life is a river
flowing toward the great sea.

Along the course, we have traveled for so long,
sometimes fast..
sometimes slow..
but always together, hand in hand.

We braved the storms, rapids and waterfalls.
And, there were many obstacles which made us turn
first one way..
then another..
But, each bend bringing us closer to the great sea.

Throughout our journey we have shared
our lives..
our dreams..
our laughter..
our love..
to be together at the river's end -
at the great sea:

A place where our bodily shells are cast away to show
our love flickering brightly.

A place where gold and silver reflects our love
to light our way in soft luminous shades.

A place where diamonds, rubies and precious crystals
sparkle at each of our kisses.

A place where the laughter of children playing
brings us tears of joy and happiness.

A place where the strumming of the angels' harps
weaves soft tapestries on which we lay.

A place where the twinkling of the stars
are our loved ones only dancing about.

A place where we journey never more.

Listen..

Do you hear a faint ringing of the captain's bell?
Are we near the river's end?

My love..
Take my hand as we go down to the sea.


4

In your eyes I see an angel,
a beautiful creature in a glow of pure sunlight...
Through the darkness of your eyes
I see the midnight sky
with stars like diamonds shining bright...

I see love, pure and innocent; love enveloping me
in the peace of your beautiful eyes...
Your eyes show me my future,
I see my life go by,
I see my wife and even hear our baby cry...

Looking further I see our hair go grey
and, yet, your hand is still holding onto mine...
That's what I see when I look in your eyes,
not just once but I see us... everytime.




5


Her magic kiss
faery dust in my blood
Her touch
Her scent
lingers in my soul
a Stolen moment
and bittersweet memories



6

Your tide crashes against my shores
Your sails open into my breeze
How I long for you to deliver me
Across this endless brutal sea

I open my arms to you
And swallow your tranquil pleas
Every inch, every breath
Brings it all back to me

An ocean full of memories
All along the shores, a strength I see
Every hope, every dream
Threatens me like nature's overpowering streams



7
I thought if i put things away....

Love,

Passion,

Hopes, and dreams

Nothing would ever cage me

But the day you walked into my life
these things i put away slowly began to open
door by door.


My mouth becomes dry, and my hands begin to sweat;
all i can think of is the taste of your sweet kisses
and the whisper of *I love you* in one gentle breath.


Again, i am naked for the whole world to see
but i have no fear... for if i had not met you
i would have never opened these things i had put away.

DATING/ LOVE: THE IRONIES OF LIFE

The greatest ironies of life: having the right person at the wrong time, having the wrong person when the time is right, and finding out that you love someone after that person walks out of your sight. Love is not about finding the right person, but creating a right relationship. It's not about how much love you have in the beginning but how much love you build till the end.You can't make someone love you, all you can do is be someone who can be loved, the rest is up to the person to realize your worth.For every beauty there is an eye somewhere to see it. For every truth there is an ear somewhere to hear it. For every love there is a heart somewhere to receive it.Each of us is a lake of love, yet strangely enough, we are all thirsty.In real love you want the other person's good. In romantic love you want the other person.

Just because you know someone doesn't mean you love them, and just because you don't know people doesn't mean you can't love them. You can fall in love with a complete stranger in a heartbeat, if God planned that route for you. So open your heart to strangers more often. You never know when God will throw that pass at you.

It doesn't take a reason to love someone, but it does to like someone. You don't love someone because you want to, you love someone because you are destined too. It's because you fall in Love with them, that you then try to find a reason, but you always come up with the answer,No reason! “Love's about finding the one person who makes your heart complete. Who makes you a better person than you ever dreamed you could be. Its about looking in the eyes of your wife and knowing all the way to your bones that she's simply the best person you've ever known.

LISTEN TO ME ...AND LISTEN WELL........

Listen to me,and listen well, because I'm only going to say this once. I desire you. I burn for you. I can't sleep at night for wanting you. Even when I didn't like you, I lusted for you. It's the most maddening thing, beguiling, damnable thing, but there it is. And if I'm to hear
one more word of nonsense from your lips, I'm going to have to tie you to the bed bloody bed and have my way with you a hundred different ways, until you finally get it through your silly skull that you are the most beautiful and desirable woman in the world, and if anyone else doesn't see that they're bloody fools


I am awfully greedy; I want everything from life. I want to be a woman and to be a man, to have many friends and to have loneliness, to work much and write good books, to travel and enjoy myself, to be selfish and to be unselfish… You see, it is difficult to get all which I want.
And then when I do not succeed I get mad with anger

LOVE/ DATING; I AM GOOD ENOUGH

It seem like I always get the woman that i don’t want to fall head-over-heels in love with me, but when I find someone I want, I fail miserably. From what I know about spirituality the real issue here is what is the problem that “wanting” is causing? If you can have the ones you don’t want wrapped around your finger as love slaves, then something about you “wanting” someone is what’s causing the real problem here.

Let’s examine what I think my problems is:

Just like that movie "She out of my league" ...sometimes..the one I want...deep inside i feel like I am not good enough for her.

He’s out of my league / I’m not good enough for him-

When you BELIEVE and ASSUME that you are irresistibly attractive and that a woman (or any woman) wants you hardcore, it often comes about. My beliefs are completely under my control. But I need to step up and stop programming my mind with garbage.I have to stop falling into the
trap of telling the only-the-ones-I-don’t-want-want-me sob story, STOP IT and never do it again.Instead, start “brainwashing myself” into this belief:

The ones I want the most will find me irresistible and they want me, hard.

You’re only not good enough when YOU decide that you aren’t good enough. I need to stop being deperate. I wasn't like this before I got divorce, but I think what happen to me weaken my self

PERSONAL/LETTER: LISTEN TO ME WELL....

Dear Love,

Listen to me,and listen well, because I'm only going to say this once. I desire you. I burn for you. I can't sleep at night for wanting you. Even when I didn't like you, I lusted for you. It's the most maddening thing, beguiling, damnable thing, but there it is. And if I'm to hear one more word of nonsense from your lips, I'm going to have to tie you to the bed bloody bed and have my way with you a hundred different ways, until you finally get it through your silly skull that you are the most beautiful and desirable woman in the world, and if anyone else doesn't see that they're bloody fools


 I am awfully greedy; I want everything from life. I want to be a man, to have many friends and to have loneliness, to work much and write good books, to travel and enjoy myself, to be selfish and to be unselfish… You see, it is difficult to get all which I want. And then when I do not succeed I get mad with anger

LOVE/THOUGHTS: HAVING THE RIGHT PERSON AT THE WRONG TIME

The greatest ironies of life: having the right person at the wrong time, having the wrong person when the time is right, and finding out that you love someone after that person walks out of your sight. Love is not about finding the right person, but creating a right relationship. It's not about how much love you have in the beginning but how much love you build till the end.You can't make someone love you, all you can do is be someone who can be loved, the rest is up to the person to realize your worth.For every beauty there is an eye somewhere to see it. For every truth there is an ear somewhere to hear it. For every love there is a heart somewhere to receive it.Each of us is a lake of love, yet strangely enough, we are all thirsty.In real love you want the other person's good. In romantic love you want the other person.

Just because you know someone doesn't mean you love them, and just because you don't know people doesn't mean you can't love them. You can fall in love with a complete stranger in a heartbeat, if God
planned that route for you. So open your heart to strangers more often. You never know when God will throw that pass at you.

It doesn't take a reason to love someone, but it does to like someone. You don't love someone because you want to, you love someone because you are destined too. It's because you fall in Love with them, that you then try to find a reason, but you always come up with the answer, No reason! "Love's about finding the one person who makes your heart complete. Who makes you a better person than you ever dreamed you could be. Its about looking in the eyes of your wife and knowing all the way to your bones that she's simply the best person you've ever known.

SPIRITUAL/LOVE:WHEN YOU THINK SHE IS OUT OF YOUR LEAGUE

It seem like I always get the woman that i don't want to fall head-over-heels in love with me, but when I find someone I want, I fail miserably. From what I know about spirituality the real issue here is what is the problem that "wanting" is causing? If you can have the ones you don't want wrapped around your finger as love slaves, then something about you "wanting" someone is what's causing the real problem here.

Let's examine what I think my problems is: Just like that movie "She out of my league" ...sometimes..the one I
want...deep inside i feel like I am not good enough for her. He's out of my league / I'm not good enough for him- When you BELIEVE and ASSUME that you are irresistibly attractive and that a woman (or any woman ) wants you hardcore, it often comes about. My beliefs are completely under my control. But I need to step up and stop programming my mind with garbage.I have to stop falling into the trap of telling the only-the-ones-I-don't-want-want-me sob story, STOP IT and never do it again.Instead, start "brainwashing myself" into this belief:

The ones I want the most will find me irresistible and they want me, hard. You're only not good enough when YOU decide that you aren't good enough. I need to stop being deperate. I wasn't like this before I got
divorce, but I think what happen to me weaken my self

LOVE/PERSONAL: WHEN SOMEONE LOVES YOU, THE WAY THEY SAY YOUR NAME IS DIFFERENT

Be soft. Do not let the world make you hard. Do not let pain make you hate. Do not let the bitterness steal your sweetness. Take pride that even though the rest of the world may disagree, you still believe it to be a beautiful place.Its strange how a single, important moment in one person's life might not even be memorable to another.You can close your eyes to things that you don't want to see, but you can't close your heart to things you don't want to feel.

I can't be with someone who has doubts, no matter how small they are. I need someone who wants to be with me as much as I want to be with them. I don't want just part of your heart, I want all of it. It's funny how when someone says they love you, you can't really feel it, but when they say they don't love you anymore, you can feel every ounce of what was drained out of your entire being. Whenever you leave something you loved so much that meant the entire world to you, there comes a long procession reaction to it. You're thrust into something that feels like somewhere you've never been before, but it's the exact same place you've been in. Sometimes your heart needs a long restart to realize how it feels to be off your sleeve, and back in your own chest. It hurts to let go. Sometimes it seems the harder you try to hold on to something or someone the more it wants to get away. You feel like some kind of criminal for having felt, for having wanted. For having wanted to be wanted. It confuses you, because you think that your feelings were wrong and it makes you feel so small because it's so hard to keep it inside when you let it out and it doesn't coma back. You're left so alone that you can't explain.One day, it all catches up with you. Every ended relationship, every tear shed, every broken heart. You pick up the pieces, you brush them off and you put them back together, only each time you need a little more glue. Then just like that, glue;s not enough anymore. The cracks, the holes, the
shattered dreams? They're a part of you. Try as you might, you can't fix what's been broken, and you can't mend what/s been torn.

When someone loves you, the way they say your name is different. You know that your name is safe in their mouth. I wanna do something that matters. Say something different, something that sets the whole world on it's ear. I wanna do something better, with the time I've been given, and I wanna try to touch a few hearts in this life and leave nothing less than something that says I was here.

LOVE/PERSONAL: LAST NIGHT I DREAMT ABOUT YOU

Last night I dreamt about you. What happened in detail I can hardly remember, all I know is that we kept merging into one another. I was you, you were me. Finally somehow you caught fire.

I ask myself why, and in that same breath, as I watch you, I get my answer. It's everything about you; it's that teasing smile, that warm scent. It's the curve of your arms, the tousle of your hair, the ring of your voice. It's just everything about you. But more than that, it's everything about me. It's everything about the way you make me laugh,cry, smile, and hurt. It's everything about the way you make me feel. And that's everything that I cannot, and would not, want to let go of.

The only two places where I feel absolutely safe are either in a bed with fresh, white sheets and pillows surrounding my head or in water. Like on the bottom of a swimming pool. Alone. Weightless. Peaceful. Nobody talking. Nobody pretending. Just being. Those are only two places. Everywhere else I get smacked in the face with arrogance, ignorance, shallowness. They knock me down and leave me bleeding on the floor.

I remember an ex girlfriend said to me....What I find very attractive, what I find sexual, are people who are unapologetic for who they are and comfortable with themselves. And I think with those two things sexual energy does come out because you're not hovering or censoring yourself, you're just being who you are. And being who you are is a very attractive quality in a person.

Laying under a blanket, cuddling close to you, feeling your breath on my skin, taking every sense that you have within. Your lips touch my shoulder, kissing me so sweet, making my heart skip every other beat. .

THOUGHTS: LIVING ON EARTH

Do you know like we were saying about the Earth revolving? It's like when you were a kid. The first time they tell you the world's turning and you just can't quite believe it because everything looks like it's standing still. I can feel it. The turn of the Earth. The ground beneath our feet is spinning at a thousand miles an hour, and the entire planet is hurtling round the sun at sixty seven thousand miles an hour, and I can feel it. We're falling through space, you and me, clinging to the skin of this tiny little world, and if we let go. That's who I am. Now, forget me, Go home.

THOUGHTS: EVERYONE ALWAYS TELL YOU NO

All your life you are told the things you cannot do. All your life they will say you're not good enough or strong enough or talented enough; they will say you're the wrong height or the wrong weight or the wrong type to play this or be this or achieve this.They will tell you no, a thousand times no, until all the no's become meaningless. All your life they will tell you no, quite firmly and very quickly. And you will tell them yes.

LOVE: FROM CUTE TO GORGEOUS

Cute is when you peek up at me with that goofy half-smile, glance over my shoulder, and after a fraction of a second to return to lock my gaze, and your lips stretch into a deeper crescent. Sexy is when you stride up to me, your long legs drumming that perfect background beat, words forming on your lips with a disruptive type of relevance, and your half-cocked eyebrow inclining in my direction. Hot is when your hair is still halfway damp from your early-morning shower, and the strands adhere themselves to the tip of your neck, and as you raise your backpack, the muscles in your arms glide beneath your skin before you turn to face me. Stunning is when you position yourself next to me in a casually deliberate pose, and then follow me out the back door, with your loping gait aligning with your laughter at my silly antics. Gorgeous is when you look down, nodding empathetically, searching for the most accurate portrayal of your feelings, as you
move your hands towards mine. Sensational is when you say my name and your deep tone reverberates through my bone marrow, starts shivers down my spine. There's not a word in the English language that isn't tinted with you. There is no vowel that doesn't carry the image of your face.

LOVE: LOVE IS LIKE AN ADDICTION

I was suffering the easily foreseeable consequences. Addiction is the hallmark of every infatuation-based love story. It all begins when the object of your adoration bestows upon you a heady, hallucinogenic dose of something you never dared to admit you wanted-an emotional speed ball, perhaps, of thunderous love and roiling excitement. Soon you start craving that intense attention, with a hungry obsession of any junkie. When the drug is with held, you promptly turn sick, crazy, and depleted (not to mention resentful of the dealer who encouraged this addiction in the first place but now refuses to pony up the good stuff anymore-- despite the fact that you know she has it hidden somewhere, goddamn it, because she used to give it to you for free).

Next stage finds you skinny and shaking in a corner, certain only that you would sell your soul or rob your neighbors just to have 'that thing' even one more time. Meanwhile, the object of your adoration has now become repulsed by you. She looks at you like you're someone she's never met before, much less someone she once loved with high passion. The irony is,you can hardly blame her. I mean, check yourself out. You're a pathetic mess,unrecognizable even to your own eyes. So that's it. You have now reached infatuation's final destination-- the complete and merciless devaluation of self.

PERSONAL/ LOVE LETTER: I WILL LOVE YOU ALWAYS WHEN THIS HAIR IS WHITE

I will love you always. When this hair is white, I will still love you. When the smooth softness of youth is replaced by the delicate softness of age, I will still want to touch your skin. When your face is full of the lines of every smile you have ever smiled, of every surprise I have seen flash through your eyes, when every tear you have ever cried has left its mark upon your face,I will treasure you all the more, because I was there to see it all. I will share your life with you, and I will love you until the last breath leaves your body or mine.

SPRITUAL: DESTINY ONLY COMES INTO ACTION WHEN YOU ARE PASSIVE

Imagine you decide to boil some milk on fire. Obviously, after a certain time you must act to remove milk from fire. Now imagine that you just get distracted and forget the boiling etc. The consequence? You are letting the nature to take its course by allowing fire to take milk to the boiling point, consequently milk would spill out and that can have further consequences from most milk going waste to the kitchen in flames.

Quite similarly destiny ONLY comes into action when you are being passive and BECOME inactive. If you act in DUE TIME using your intelligence & will power - destiny or nature will remain inactive. In simple words, when you act, take decisions with responsibility and follow your actions and their consequences - you remain in charge of you rSELF, if you distract and abandon the actions or their consequent reactions & become passive, the destiny takes charge and continue with the course of actions till they reach to the end. Nature only overtakes human actions when humans run away or leave their course open. The course of nature is very NATURAL & it will only follow a natural path.

The nature's path may appear to be brute and unbearable for human beings but nature works by following the mathemetical formulas of nature - which are accurate, precise and incessant. Before the NATURE takes charge - you control your own actions and let the destiny continue to be 'behind' you. IF you do NOT lead your ownself - nature will lead you. You can stay passive but destiny is hyper active phenomenon which is always running behind the scenes.