VIDEO:Inspirational Short Film- You Too Will Cry After Watching This

DATING;QUESTION..I REALLY WANT TO ASK THESE WOMAN

1. What’s your policy regarding leaving people suddenly and without warning?

2. Are you obnoxiously dependent, or are we still going to be able to have our own lives?

3. Are you going to make me wait 6 dates before sleeping with me?

4. Is it okay if we wait like, 6 dates before sleeping together?

5. Do you actually watch Rachel Maddow/Read the NY Times/love this band/go to MoMA in your spare time, or are you just saying that?

6. How much money do you actually make?

7. Are you seeing other people? HOW many other people?
 
8. You talk to your ex how often?

9. Will you be willing to take a backseat to my career? Will you want me to take a backseat to yours?

10. Will you be just as apt to keep the bathroom door closed six months, six years into the relationship, as you are right now?

11. Do you have any plans to gain a ton of weight/lose a ton of weight/take up drugs/change your career/change your religion/change your country of residence, or in any other way drastically alter your life in the next two years?

12. Will you always expect me to pay? (Will you always pay?)

13. Does any part of you right now think that I’m not someone you could be serious about? How attracted/interested in me are you really?

ARTICLE/SPIRITUAL:Quantum Theory Proves Consciousness Moves To Another Universe At Death

Quantum Theory Proves Consciousness Moves To Another Universe At Death

The author of this publication, scientist Dr. Robert Lanza who was voted the 3rd most important scientist alive by the NY Times, has no doubts that this is possible.

Lanza is an expert in regenerative medicine and scientific director of Advanced Cell Technology Company.

Before he has been known for his extensive research which dealt with stem cells, he was also famous for several successful experiments on cloning endangered animal species.

But not so long ago, the scientist became involved with physics, quantum mechanics and astrophysics.

This explosive mixture has given birth to the new theory of biocentrism, which the professor has been preaching ever since.

Biocentrism teaches that life and consciousness are fundamental to the universe. It is consciousness that creates the material universe, not the other way around.

Lanza points to the structure of the universe itself, and that the laws, forces, and constants of the universe appear to be fine-tuned for life, implying intelligence existed prior to matter.

He also claims that space and time are not objects or things, but rather tools of our animal understanding.

Lanza says that we carry space and time around with us “like turtles with shells.” meaning that when the shell comes off (space and time), we still exist.

The theory implies that death of consciousness simply does not exist. It only exists as a thought because people identify themselves with their body.

They believe that the body is going to perish, sooner or later, thinking their consciousness will disappear too.

If the body generates consciousness, then consciousness dies when the body dies. But if the body receives consciousness in the same way that a cable box receives satellite signals, then of course consciousness does not end at the death of the physical vehicle.

In fact, consciousness exists outside of constraints of time and space. It is able to be anywhere: in the human body and outside of it.

In other words, it is non-local in the same sense that quantum objects are non-local.

Lanza also believes that multiple universes can exist simultaneously. In one universe, the body can be dead.


And in another it continues to exist, absorbing consciousness which migrated into this universe.

This means that a dead person while traveling through the same tunnel ends up not in hell or in heaven, but in a similar world he or she once inhabited, but this time alive. And so on, infinitely. It’s almost like a cosmic Russian doll afterlife effect.

This hope-instilling, but extremely controversial theory by Lanza has many unwitting supporters, not just mere mortals who want to live forever, but also some well-known scientists.

These are the physicists and astrophysicists who tend to agree with existence of parallel worlds and who suggest the possibility of multiple universes.

Multiverse (multi-universe) is a so-called scientific concept, which they defend. They believe that no physical laws exist which would prohibit the existence of parallel worlds.

The first one was a science fiction writer H.G. Wells who proclaimed in 1895 in his story “The Door in the Wall”.

And after 62 years, this idea was developed by Dr. Hugh Everett in his graduate thesis at the Princeton University. It basically posits that at any given moment the universe divides into countless similar instances.

And the next moment, these “newborn” universes split in a similar fashion. In some of these worlds you may be present: reading this article in one universe, or watching TV in another.

The triggering factor for these multiplyingworlds is our actions, explained Everett. If we make some choices, instantly one universe splits into two with different versions of outcomes.

In the 1980s, Andrei Linde, scientist from the Lebedev’s Institute of physics, developed the theory of multiple universes. He is now a professor at Stanford University.

Linde explained: Space consists of many inflating spheres, which give rise to similar spheres, and those, in turn, produce spheres in even greater numbers, and so on to infinity.

In the universe, they are spaced apart. They are not aware of each other’s existence. But they represent parts of the same physical universe.

The fact that our universe is not alone is supported by data received from the Planck space telescope.

Using the data, scientists have created the most accurate map of the microwave background, the so-called cosmic relic background radiation, which has remained since the inception of our universe.


They also found that the universe has a lot of dark recesses represented by some holes and extensive gaps.

Theoretical physicist Laura Mersini-Houghton from the North Carolina University with her colleagues argue: the anomalies of the microwave background exist due to the fact that our universe is influenced by other universes existing nearby. And holes and gaps are a direct result of attacks on us by neighboring universes.

So, there is abundance of places or other universes where our soul could migrate after death, according to the theory of neo-biocentrism. But does the soul exist?

Is there any scientific theory of consciousness that could accommodate such a claim?

According to Dr. Stuart Hameroff, a near-death experience happens when the quantum information that inhabits the nervous system leaves the body and dissipates into the universe.

Contrary to materialistic accounts of consciousness, Dr. Hameroff offers an alternative explanation of consciousness that can perhaps appeal to both the rational scientific mind and personal intuitions.

Consciousness resides, according to Stuart and British physicist Sir Roger Penrose, in the microtubules of the brain cells, which are the primary sites of quantum processing.

Upon death, this information is released from your body, meaning that your consciousness goes with it.

They have argued that our experience of consciousness is the result of quantum gravity effects in these microtubules, a theory which they dubbed orchestrated objective reduction (Orch-OR).

Consciousness, or at least proto-consciousness is theorized by them to be a fundamental property of the universe, present even at the first moment of the universe during the Big Bang.

“In one such scheme proto-conscious experience is a basic property of physical reality accessible to a quantum process associated with brain activity.”

Our souls are in fact constructed from the very fabric of the universe – and may have existed since the beginning of time. Our brains are just receivers and amplifiers for the proto-consciousness that is intrinsic to the fabric of space-time.

So is there really a part of your consciousness that is non-material and will live on after the death of your physical body?

Dr Hameroff told the Science Channel’s Through the Wormhole documentary:

“Let’s say the heart stops beating, the blood stops flowing, the microtubules lose their quantum state.

The quantum information within the microtubules is not destroyed, it can’t be destroyed, it just distributes and dissipates to the universe at large”.

Robert Lanza would add here that not only does it exist in the universe, it exists perhaps in another universe.

If the patient is resuscitated, revived, this quantum information can go back into the microtubules and the patient says “I had a near death experience”‘

He adds: “If they’re not revived, and the patient dies, it’s possible that this quantum information can exist outside the body, perhaps indefinitely, as a soul.”

This account of quantum consciousness explains things like near-death experiences, astral projection, out of body experiences, and even reincarnation without needing to appeal to religious ideology.

The energy of your consciousness potentially gets recycled back into a different body at some point, and in the mean time it exists outside of the physical body on some other level of reality, and possibly in another universe.

ARTICLE/ SPIRITUAL: THIS IS HEAVEN BY SAM HARRIS

This Must Be Heaven

Once upon a time, a neurosurgeon named Eben Alexander contracted a bad case of bacterial meningitis and fell into a coma. While immobile in his hospital bed, he experienced visions of such intense beauty that they changed everything—not just for him, but for all of us, and for science as a whole. According to Newsweek, Alexander’s experience proves that consciousness is independent of the brain, that death is an illusion, and that an eternity of perfect splendor awaits us beyond the grave—complete with the usual angels, clouds, and departed relatives, but also butterflies and beautiful girls in peasant dress. Our current understanding of the mind “now lies broken at our feet”—for, as the doctor writes, “What happened to me destroyed it, and I intend to spend the rest of my life investigating the true nature of consciousness and making the fact that we are more, much more, than our physical brains as clear as I can, both to my fellow scientists and to people at large.”

Well, I intend to spend the rest of the morning sparing him the effort. Whether you read it online or hold the physical object in your hands, this issue of Newsweek is best viewed as an archaeological artifact that is certain to embarrass us in the eyes of future generations. Its existence surely says more about our time than the editors at the magazine meant to say—for the cover alone reveals the abasement and desperation of our journalism, the intellectual bankruptcy and resultant tenacity of faith-based religion, and our ubiquitous confusion about the nature of scientific authority. The article is the modern equivalent of a 14th-century woodcut depicting the work of alchemists, inquisitors, Crusaders, and fortune-tellers. I hope our descendants understand that at least some of us were blushing.

As many of you know, I am interested in “spiritual” experiences of the sort Alexander reports. Unlike many atheists, I don’t doubt the subjective phenomena themselves—that is, I don’t believe that everyone who claims to have seen an angel, or left his body in a trance, or become one with the universe, is lying or mentally ill. Indeed, I have had similar experiences myself in meditation, in lucid dreams (even while meditating in a lucid dream), and through the use of various psychedelics (in times gone by). I know that astonishing changes in the contents of consciousness are possible and can be psychologically transformative.

And, unlike many neuroscientists and philosophers, I remain agnostic on the question of how consciousness is related to the physical world. There are, of course, very good reasons to believe that it is an emergent property of brain activity, just as the rest of the human mind obviously is. But we know nothing about how such a miracle of emergence might occur. And if consciousness were, in fact, irreducible—or even separable from the brain in a way that would give comfort to Saint Augustine—my worldview would not be overturned. I know that we do not understand consciousness, and nothing that I think I know about the cosmos, or about the patent falsity of most religious beliefs, requires that I deny this. So, although I am an atheist who can be expected to be unforgiving of religious dogma, I am not reflexively hostile to claims of the sort Alexander has made. In principle, my mind is open. (It really is.)

But Alexander’s account is so bad—his reasoning so lazy and tendentious—that it would be beneath notice if not for the fact that it currently disgraces the cover of a major newsmagazine. Alexander is also releasing a book at the end of the month, Proof of Heaven: A Neurosurgeon’s Journey into the Afterlife, which seems destined to become an instant bestseller. As much as I would like to simply ignore the unfolding travesty, it would be derelict of me to do so.

But first things first: You really must read Alexander’s article.

I trust that doing so has given you cause to worry that the good doctor is just another casualty of American-style Christianity—for though he claims to have been a nonbeliever before his adventures in coma, he presents the following self-portrait:

Although I considered myself a faithful Christian, I was so more in name than in actual belief. I didn’t begrudge those who wanted to believe that Jesus was more than simply a good man who had suffered at the hands of the world. I sympathized deeply with those who wanted to believe that there was a God somewhere out there who loved us unconditionally. In fact, I envied such people the security that those beliefs no doubt provided. But as a scientist, I simply knew better than to believe them myself.

What it means to be a “faithful Christian” without “actual belief” is not spelled out, but few nonbelievers will be surprised when our hero’s scientific skepticism proves no match for his religious conditioning. Most of us have been around this block often enough to know that many “former atheists”—like Francis Collins—spent so long on the brink of faith, and yearned for its emotional consolations with such vampiric intensity, that the slightest breeze would send them spinning into the abyss. For Collins, you may recall, all it took to establish the divinity of Jesus and the coming resurrection of the dead was the sight of a frozen waterfall. Alexander seems to have required a ride on a psychedelic butterfly. In either case, it’s not the perception of beauty we should begrudge but the utter absence of intellectual seriousness with which the author interprets it.

Everything—absolutely everything—in Alexander’s account rests on repeated assertions that his visions of heaven occurred while his cerebral cortex was “shut down,” “inactivated,” “completely shut down,” “totally offline,” and “stunned to complete inactivity.” The evidence he provides for this claim is not only inadequate—it suggests that he doesn’t know anything about the relevant brain science. Perhaps he has saved a more persuasive account for his book—though now that I’ve listened to an hour-long interview with him online, I very much doubt it. In his Newsweek article, Alexander asserts that the cessation of cortical activity was “clear from the severity and duration of my meningitis, and from the global cortical involvement documented by CT scans and neurological examinations.” To his editors, this presumably sounded like neuroscience.

The problem, however, is that “CT scans and neurological examinations” can’t determine neuronal inactivity—in the cortex or anywhere else. And Alexander makes no reference to functional data that might have been acquired by fMRI, PET, or EEG—nor does he seem to realize that only this sort of evidence could support his case. Obviously, the man’s cortex is functioning now—he has, after all, written a book—so whatever structural damage appeared on CT could not have been “global.” (Otherwise, he would be claiming that his entire cortex was destroyed and then grew back.) Coma is not associated with the complete cessation of cortical activity, in any case. And to my knowledge, almost no one thinks that consciousness is purely a matter of cortical activity. Alexander’s unwarranted assumptions are proliferating rather quickly. Why doesn’t he know these things? He is, after all, a neurosurgeon who survived a coma and now claims to be upending the scientific worldview on the basis of the fact that his cortex was totally quiescent at the precise moment he was enjoying the best day of his life in the company of angels. Even if his entire cortex had truly shut down (again, an incredible claim), how can he know that his visions didn’t occur in the minutes and hours during which its functions returned?

I confess that I found Alexander’s account so alarmingly unscientific that I began to worry that something had gone wrong with my own brain. So I sought the opinion of Mark Cohen, a pioneer in the field of neuroimaging who holds appointments in the Departments of Psychiatry & Biobehavioral Science, Neurology, Psychology, Radiological Science, and Bioengineering at UCLA. (He was also my thesis advisor.) Here is part of what he had to say:

This poetic interpretation of his experience is not supported by evidence of any kind. As you correctly point out, coma does not equate to “inactivation of the cerebral cortex” or “higher-order brain functions totally offline” or “neurons of [my] cortex stunned into complete inactivity”. These describe brain death, a one hundred percent lethal condition. There are many excellent scholarly articles that discuss the definitions of coma. (For example: 1 & 2)

We are not privy to his EEG records, but high alpha activity is common in coma. Also common is “flat” EEG. The EEG can appear flat even in the presence of high activity, when that activity is not synchronous. For example, the EEG flattens in regions involved in direct task processing. This phenomenon is known as event-related desynchronization (hundreds of references).

As is obvious to you, this is truth by authority. Neurosurgeons, however, are rarely well-trained in brain function. Dr. Alexander cuts brains; he does not appear to study them. “There is no scientific explanation for the fact that while my body lay in coma, my mind—my conscious, inner self—was alive and well. While the neurons of my cortex were stunned to complete inactivity by the bacteria that had attacked them, my brain-free consciousness ...” True, science cannot explain brain-free consciousness. Of course, science cannot explain consciousness anyway. In this case, however, it would be parsimonious to reject the whole idea of consciousness in the absence of brain activity. Either his brain was active when he had these dreams, or they are a confabulation of whatever took place in his state of minimally conscious coma.

There are many reports of people remembering dream-like states while in medical coma. They lack consistency, of course, but there is nothing particularly unique in Dr. Alexander’s unfortunate episode.

Okay, so it appears that my own cortex hasn’t completely shut down. In fact, there are further problems with Alexander’s account. Not only does he appear ignorant of the relevant science, but he doesn’t realize how many people have experienced visions similar to his while their brains were operational. In his online interview we learn about the kinds of conversations he’s now having with skeptics:

I guess one could always argue, “Well, your brain was probably just barely able to ignite real consciousness and then it would flip back into a very diseased state,” which doesn’t make any sense to me. Especially because that hyper-real state is so indescribable and so crisp. It’s totally unlike any drug experience. A lot of people have come up to me and said, “Oh that sounds like a DMT experience,” or “That sounds like ketamine.” Not at all. That is not even in the right ballpark.

Those things do not explain the kind of clarity, the rich interactivity, the layer upon layer of understanding and of lessons taught by deceased loved ones and spiritual beings.

“Not even in the right ballpark”? His experience sounds so much like a DMT trip that we are not only in the right ballpark, we are talking about the stitching on the same ball. Here is Alexander’s description of the afterlife:

I was a speck on a beautiful butterfly wing; millions of other butterflies around us. We were flying through blooming flowers, blossoms on trees, and they were all coming out as we flew through them… [there were] waterfalls, pools of water, indescribable colors, and above there were these arcs of silver and gold light and beautiful hymns coming down from them. Indescribably gorgeous hymns. I later came to call them “angels,” those arcs of light in the sky. I think that word is probably fairly accurate….

Then we went out of this universe. I remember just seeing everything receding and initially I felt as if my awareness was in an infinite black void. It was very comforting but I could feel the extent of the infinity and that it was, as you would expect, impossible to put into words. I was there with that Divine presence that was not anything that I could visibly see and describe, and with a brilliant orb of light….

They said there were many things that they would show me, and they continued to do that. In fact, the whole higher-dimensional multiverse was this incredibly complex corrugated ball and all these lessons coming into me about it. Part of the lessons involved becoming all of what I was being shown. It was indescribable.

But then I would find myself—and time out there I can say is totally different from what we call time. There was access from out there to any part of our space/time and that made it difficult to understand a lot of these memories because we always try to sequence things and put them in linear form and description. That just really doesn’t work.

Everything that Alexander describes here and in his Newsweek article, including the parts I have left out, has been reported by DMT users. The similarity is uncanny. Here is how the late Terence McKenna described the prototypical DMT trance:

Under the influence of DMT, the world becomes an Arabian labyrinth, a palace, a more than possible Martian jewel, vast with motifs that flood the gaping mind with complex and wordless awe. Color and the sense of a reality-unlocking secret nearby pervade the experience. There is a sense of other times, and of one’s own infancy, and of wonder, wonder and more wonder. It is an audience with the alien nuncio. In the midst of this experience, apparently at the end of human history, guarding gates that seem surely to open on the howling maelstrom of the unspeakable emptiness between the stars, is the Aeon.

The Aeon, as Heraclitus presciently observed, is a child at play with colored balls. Many diminutive beings are present there—the tykes, the self-transforming machine elves of hyperspace. Are they the children destined to be father to the man? One has the impression of entering into an ecology of souls that lies beyond the portals of what we naively call death. I do not know. Are they the synesthetic embodiment of ourselves as the Other, or of the Other as ourselves? Are they the elves lost to us since the fading of the magic light of childhood? Here is a tremendum barely to be told, an epiphany beyond our wildest dreams. Here is the realm of that which is stranger than we can suppose. Here is the mystery, alive, unscathed, still as new for us as when our ancestors lived it fifteen thousand summers ago. The tryptamine entities offer the gift of new language, they sing in pearly voices that rain down as colored petals and flow through the air like hot metal to become toys and such gifts as gods would give their children. The sense of emotional connection is terrifying and intense. The Mysteries revealed are real and if ever fully told will leave no stone upon another in the small world we have gone so ill in.

This is not the mercurial world of the UFO, to be invoked from lonely hilltops; this is not the siren song of lost Atlantis wailing through the trailer courts of crack-crazed America. DMT is not one of our irrational illusions. I believe that what we experience in the presence of DMT is real news. It is a nearby dimension—frightening, transformative, and beyond our powers to imagine, and yet to be explored in the usual way. We must send fearless experts, whatever that may come to mean, to explore and to report on what they find.  (Terence McKenna, Food of the Gods, pp. 258-259.)

Alexander believes that his E. coli-addled brain could not have produced his visions because they were too “intense,” too “hyper-real,” too “beautiful,” too “interactive,” and too drenched in significance for even a healthy brain to conjure. He also appears to think that despite their timeless quality, his visions could not have arisen in the minutes or hours during which his cortex (which surely never went off) switched back on. He clearly knows nothing about what people with working brains experience under the influence of psychedelics. Nor does he know that visions of the sort that McKenna describes, although they may seem to last for ages, require only a brief span of biological time. Unlike LSD and other long-acting psychedelics, DMT alters consciousness for merely a few minutes. Alexander would have had more than enough time to experience a visionary ecstasy as he was coming out of his coma (whether his cortex was rebooting or not).

Does Alexander know that DMT already exists in the brain as a neurotransmitter? Did his brain experience a surge of DMT release during his coma? This is pure speculation, of course, but it is a far more credible hypothesis than that his cortex “shut down,” freeing his soul to travel to another dimension. As one of his correspondents has already informed him, similar experiences can be had with ketamine, which is a surgical anesthetic that is occasionally used to protect a traumatized brain. Did Alexander by any chance receive ketamine while in the hospital? Would he even think it relevant if he had? His assertion that psychedelics like DMT and ketamine “do not explain the kind of clarity, the rich interactivity, the layer upon layer of understanding” he experienced is perhaps the most amazing thing he has said since he returned from heaven. Such compounds are universally understood to do the job. And most scientists believe that the reliable effects of psychedelics indicate that the brain is at the very least involved in the production of visionary states of the sort Alexander is talking about.

Again, there is nothing to be said against Alexander’s experience. It sounds perfectly sublime. And such ecstasies do tell us something about how good a human mind can feel. The problem is that the conclusions Alexander has drawn from his experience—he continually reminds us, as a scientist—are based on some very obvious errors in reasoning and gaps in his understanding.

Let me suggest that, whether or not heaven exists, Alexander sounds precisely how a scientist should not sound when he doesn’t know what he is talking about. And his article is not the sort of thing that the editors of a once-important magazine should publish if they hope to reclaim some measure of respect for their battered brand.

VIDEO: "Unsung Hero"

PERSONAL: COULD I BE

Could I be the one you pour your heart out to, the one to love you and be true. Could I be the one that takes all your pain away, the one in your life to stay. Could I be the one that you've been waiting for,  the one to give you my heart and much more. Could I be the one to take long walks in the park, the one you make love to in the dark. Could I be that special someone in your life, the one that you would later call your husband. Could I be the one that you hold so very close, the one that would love you the most. Could I be the one to make you smile, the one that bears your child.Could I be the one to give you everything though I don't have much, the one to feel your gentle touch. Could I be the one to hear you say "I Love You", the one that you be true to. Could you be the one for me,  'cause all these things I'd love to be.

LOVE LETTER: DEAR SOULMATE

Dear Soulmate

Your skin, just like a shining glass.It enables me see my face as I pass. Your ears hear me when I call.Your strong, lovely hands will never let our love fall.Your mouth releases only good news.With a sweet voice I dare not lose A single step you take shakes the earth.A word you speak takes away my breath.Your eyes, my love, are bright and clear.Among roses, you are the loveliest rose, my love.Your beauty shines like diamond sand. One like you will not be found in any land.When you are by my side .Nothing else matters,When you are with me. When you say you Love me. It feels so good to hear you say those words.When you're happy.It makes me feel good to see you so happy.When you're sad and blue.I want to make you happy again.When you smile .I couldn't be any happier.I wish you would understand.How I feel about you.I wish you would tell me how you feel .Tell me!  Tell me, please.I Love you.I know you Love me, too .But you just have a funny way to show your love.Please try .You mean so much to me.I Would Rather Be with You Anytime. Love You To see your face in the bright sunlight.I would give away my soul.And to hear your voice flow to my heart.Would make more than whole.To taste your kiss as you bend close.Is more than I could dream.And to feel your warmth when you come home. Would mean everything.I look at you and I drown in the intensity of your sweet love. Everyday spent with you puts a deeper longing into my heart to be with you for the rest of all time. You wink, you smile you hold me close.Life feels right.I am where I want to be.Your kiss brings me into your world and your eyes entice me to be all I can be. Your touch sends me into utter ecstacy. Your words make my day brighter.  I need you...When you look at me. deep down inside do you see all these things... this love burning this unfulfilled desire? I'm putting my all into you I want this to last I want to be with you when I wake up each morning and when I lay my head down at night all through every day and every starry night.I need you with me because I love you so very much

LOVE LETTER: DEAR SOULMATE

Dear Soulmate,

When I first met you you were just a person- oh that was a terribly wrong assumption. When I first saw you it was a physical attraction- now I love your everything-as if a chain reaction I like you for your physical, but love your spiritual and I think of you daily-as if you are my ritual.I thought we stood no chance-what a bad assumption for now I see you are my hope in this world of corruption for someone like you-i have forever prayed and how I am so fortunate that thru all this you have stayed ....stayed in my life, to lighten my road ...stayed in my heart-in this world so cold.From the moment we met,I knew it was you,Who would steal away my heart,And forever to me be true.Every day that goes by,I realize even more,How much I care about you,I've never been so sure.Our future lies in front of us, but together we will be,Strong enough to conquer,Any conflict that we see. For all you have given me,I could not ask for more,Only wish that in return, I could give you what you ask for.I know that if I need something,I only say your name,And in every way you can,The world is mine, without a shame! I wouldn't give you up,For love, or life, or pride,Because I know that in the end,You'll be standing by my side.I think in God's will,He's put you and me together,To set a good example,Of how true love lasts FOREVER! For everything I am,For everything I'll be, I'm nothing without you, I WANT THIS WORLD TO SEE!

LOVE LETTER: DEAR SOULMATE

Dear Soulmate

You are my strength--the fiber of my being--the meaning of life.You are the music of my soul--the humming of my heart --the laughter in my eyes.How can "one" be so beautiful.that the eye envies thee.How can "one" be so wonderful..you are what an angel can only be.How can "one" be so perfect as if everything can be so right...only an angel glows so magnificantly that it can blind the stars that shine at night.How can "one" be so breathtaking leave you speechless and have all the right things to say.How can "one" turn clouds into sunshine and make all my misery go away.How can "one" be mine so full of beauty...so honest and love thy lonely me.Only an angel can ever be so wonderful; I pray to love only thee! When we touch a miracle is born. When we kiss a gift is given.When we make love,magic explodes caressing our souls uniting as one.When we hug one another..an invisible shield fastens all around us...keeping serenity within.As I look in your eyes,  I see my world;My heart, cradled in your hands, beats only for you;I want to call you up on the phone,Tell you all about my day,Tell you that everything has gone wrong and hear from you that everything is going to be okay.I want to walk down the street and hold your hand tight because in your arms,Everything is alright.I want to give you half of my lunch and maybe my vegetables too.And when we walk together in the rain.I want to share my umbrella with no one else but you.I want to lay in bed with you ten years from now, and read that sweet romantic novel I've had for years,Kiss you oh so softly..while you wipe away my sympathetic tears. I love you


I never knew great things await me...When I suddenly walked into your life I had no clue of what your love would bring. Until things gradually began to unfold.You turned my weakness into strength and my sorrow into gladness You changed my wickedness to kindness and my foolishness to cleverness You made my words the pillar of your heart.You made my burden the load of your life. You made my worries the heaviness of your heart.You healed my sorrows with tears from your eyes.As empty as I could feel inside.You fill me up with abundance of love.On my way to the path of hell.You suddenly came to give me light.A thousand times you came to my rescue and created brand new memories in me. Feelings, my mouth could not reveal.Finally taking full control of me..Through your nose, I smell the sweetness of love.Through your feet, I walk the path of life.Through your ears, I hear the voice of God. Through your mouth, I speak the words of love.I knew from the moment I said hello,That I would never let you go. When we opened up our hearts,I knew that the love would never depart. And I'd do anything,Yes, I mean everything.My love, I'd do anything? Just to be with you.Whenever we are drawn apart.By some force that can't be stopped,Just remember my love is always with you.You have my spirit and my heart.And I'd do anything,Yes, I mean everything.My love, I'd do anything?Just to be with you.Now when life seems hard to bear,And when it feels like no one cares,I'm here for you. I'm here for life.I will love you?Until the day I die!And I'd do anything,Yes, I mean everything.My love, I'd do anything?Just to be with you.

PERSONAL: THIS WORLD WAS NOT BUILD FOR ROMANTICS

 I have come to the realization that I have turned into Ted Mosby.

For those of you who don’t watch How I Met Your Mother, start watching it. Immediately.  It stars Ted Mosby and his group of friends as he tells his children the story of how he came to meet their mother (duh). Ted is a romantic from day one, a professional architect with high hopes of finding the love of his life somewhere in New York. I am ready to admit it: I’m a self-proclaimed realist who, somewhere along the line, inadvertently became a hopeless romantic. I look for relationships in all the wrong places, seeking out true love with partners who are seeking a completely different situation. I somehow always end up with my heart on my sleeve, hoping that someone that I care for won’t hurt me.

That being said, searching for love has never been at the forefront my mind; I have had so many other goals throughout my life. A career..But as much as I claim to not care about love, to not be searching for it, never directly hoping to discover it, I really would not be against it. And by that I mean I would really like to find a partner. I try so hard to be analytical, intelligent, and forward-thinking, but I’m a sucker for poetry, subtle displays of affection. Is that even possible?  Maybe it isn’t a necessity for my survival, but it certainly is something that I want, something I can’t help but pursue, however futile those pursuits may be. I’ve fallen head-over-heels in love with the idea of being in love. It probably sounds silly, but the concept of meaning something to someone, of being the last thought on someone’s mind before they go to sleep,  of being someone’s emotional rock and having that support for myself, is something that I have found myself desiring. Is that needy?  Am I giving in to an embedded need within myself for a partner to take care of me?

Being a romantic sucks, because the world was not built for romantics. It was intended for those that know that grand romantic gestures come off as creepy more often than not, and the idea of “soul mates” is as constructed as anything shown in pornography or MTV Cribs. I was raised on television and movies.put on emphasis on true love and romanticism and all that poison that infects vulnerable youth like me.  I still cling to the belief that the mystical “her” may be sitting next to me on the bus. She may be standing behind me at the liquor store, or serve me my food the next time I eat at a restaurant, or attend the same concert I go to this summer. Or, as Ted’s misguided love for Robin that once permeated, perhaps I’ve already met her. Where or when I meet her isn’t the issue for me (yet). It’s the if. 

PERSONAL: LOOKING FOR THE MOTHER OF MY CHILDREN

I'm fairly certain I have Ted Mosby Syndrome.(From the show-How I Met Your Mother.) What I'm talking about is this drive, this yearn, this desire for finding, as Ted so regularly puts it, the mother of my children. You may be thinking "that doesn't sound too bad ." Yeah, alone, it doesn't. Having that drive to find the One isn't a bad thing at all. It's the premature head-over-heels-and-land-on-your-face-first component that's the kicker part of Ted Mosby Syndrome. And this applies to all girls we take interest to, even the ones that we don't even know that well yet - say, girls that we meet once or twice, but then have to leave for a news report about a guy jumping off a bridge, or something like that.  It's a sure killer for men like us.

People with Ted Mosby Syndrome are normally well aware of the fact that we have it. We are acutely aware that yes, it's crazy to feel such a way about a girl. Yes, we know that it's stupidly juvenile and naive. And yes, we completely torn apart by the reasonable and understandable fact that it's unreasonable and freaks girls out. But I'll tell you one thing though ,we care. We care to be there when you need a shoulder to cry on. We care to love and cherish each day with you no less than the day before. We care to actually care about you more than anyone on this planet. And why? Because that's who we are. It's part of Ted Mosby Syndrome.

Having said that, I need to address the pink elephant in the room. Some people see Ted Mosby Syndrome as the signature indication of a desperado. In fact, I'm sure that if you look at anyone who claims to be in Ted Mosby's position, I'd more than likely be inclined to agree that they probably do appear to be desperate. And perhaps they are. But when you look at these people, I want you to look at why they want that someone special in their life. More than often enough, they want them because they think that it will complete them and make them "happy". I put "happy" in quotations for a reason *as I put both my index and middle fingers in the air and do air quotes*. Ladies  a man does not rely on woman for contentment of his own. What happens when their partner no longer keeps them satisfied? What then huh? When you have Ted Mosby Syndrome, you love because you want to give; not because they have an heart warming smile, gorgeous eyes and beautiful hair, not because they're rich and they buy you stuff, and because they make you feel better - regardless of the method or context. But to just give and give everything because that is your very nature. Nothing more. Nothing less. Right from the very beginning when you first see her; like something out of an old movie where the sailor sees the girl across the crowded dance floor, turns to his buddy and says "See that girl? I'm going to marry her some day."

I'd be lying if I said that all men who truly have Ted Mosby Syndrome are completely happy. By golly gosh, sometimes it's miserable, frustrating and down right depressing. The condition can have those effects and I'm sure we've all seen the toll its taken on the person whom this condition was named after. But do you know why we feel like this? It's because we have all this loving to give but it's being used, thrown away, rejected or even ignored and that's rough going, especially when you only mean to make her truly feel loved. However, it's all part of the process and in the name of finding the One. And in the end, we know it's going to be worth it. As Mr Mosby declared himself in his pilot episode monologue:

"You know what?  I’m done being single.  I’m not good at it.  Look, obviously you can’t tell a woman you just met you love her, but…it sucks that you can’t!  I’ll tell you something though!  If a woman – not you, just some hypothetical woman – were to bear with me through all this, I think I’d make a damn good husband, because that’s the stuff I’d be good at.  Stuff like making her laugh, and being a good father, and walking her five hypothetical dogs."


 I’m not ashamed that I’m like Ted Mosby. He knows what he wants….he’s been through hell to get it…and now he has it. But that’s not even the coolest part. Whenever I tell my kids how I met their mother…my voice will change into Bob Saget’s!!! I can’t wait!

PERSONAL/THOUGHTS/DATING: TIMING IS A BITCH

 If you have never watched How I Met Your Mother, shame on you. I freakin love that show. I realized I am Ted Mosby. For those who haven't seen the show, Ted is a guy who falls in love with the first girl who shows him any attention.  He is a hopeless romantic who keeps searching for that "one". He has a bad tendency to think that every girl he meets is the "one". Haha. And thats where I can relate. Its like "Here you go! Here's my heart" then "Awww" (Thats me after she turned it down), next girl comes around and  "Here you go! Here's my heart" then "Awww". Yup vicious cycle.

I saw an episode the other day that surprised me because I finished one of Ted's comments. Totally freaked me out! It was Season 7, Episode 1"The Best Man" I'll insert the conversation between him and Robin.


Ted: I used to believe in destiny you know? I’d go to the bagel place, see a pretty girl in line, reading my favorite novel, whistling the song that’s been stuck in my head all week and I'd think “Wow. Hey maybe she’s the one”. Now I think “I just know that bitch is going to take the last whole wheat everything bagel.”

Robin: You’ve just been focused on work

Ted: No, it’s more than that. I stopped believing. Not in some depressed I’m going to cry during my toast way. Not in a way I even noticed until tonight. It's just every day I think I believe a little less and a little less and a little less and that........sucks. What do I do about that Scherbatsky?


Robin: Your Ted Mosby, you start believing again.

Ted: In what? Destiny?

Robin: Chemistry. You should have chemistry. You only need one other thing.

Ted: What’s that?

Robin: Timing.  But timing’s a bitch.

I answered the "sucks" part. Haha. Well enough about me, I mean Ted. You get the point. 

POETRY: COME BE WITH ME

Come spend, my love, 
with me, this day
while warm, soft breezes 
gently play.
With meadowlarks 
in joyous mood,
as young fawns 
browse in dappled wood.

The earth fills out 
to Nature's touch -
with greens and browns 
and greys and such.
When all the world seems 
brightly gay;
Come spend, my love, 
with me, this day.

2


Love's hypnotic rhapsody washes over me
                 It's bewitching spell drowning my soul
                        in wavewashed ecstasy
                 As I submit myself to her unparalleled
                                beauty.

               Pondering an endless horizon, I wonder at
                    the endlessness of my feelings;
                   Joy soaring to boundless altitudes
               Love, burning with an intensity which will
                           scorch the earth
                          purging it of hate,
                  Love, unbound and endless, which
                        will nourish the world,
                       feeding those lonely souls
                     who have never known Love.

                   My heart intones endless litanies,
                  for my love for you,as a religion,
                         and you, as a goddess
                  of all that is beautiful and sublime
                     inhabit the temple that is my
                                 soul
                Presiding over my emotions and desires
                        with arms outstretched
                   and understanding in your heart.

THOUGHTS/REVIEW: THE ENDING OF HOW I MET YOUR MOTHER.

“You know what? I’m done being single, I’m not good at it. Look, obviously you can’t tell a woman you just met that you love her, but it sucks that you can’t. I’ll tell you something though, if a woman, not you, just some hypothetical woman, were to bear with me through all this, I think I’d make a damn good husband, because that’s the stuff I’d be good at. Stuff like making her laugh and being a good father and walking her five hypothetical dogs. Being a good kisser…”

–Ted Mosby, “Pilot” How I Met Your Mother, 1×01

“Hi— I’m Ted Mosby. And exactly 45 days from now you and I are going to meet and we’re going to fall in love and we’re going to get married and we’re going to have 2 kids and we’re going to love them and each other so much. All that is 45 days away, but I’m here now I guess because… I want those extra 45 days with you. I want each one of them. Look and if I can’t have them I’ll take the 45 seconds before your boyfriend shows up and punches me in the face, because… I love you. I’m always gonna love you, til the end of my days and beyond. You’ll see.”

–Ted Mosby, “Time Travelers” How I Met Your Mother, 8×20

A few weeks ago I sat down to watch what seemed to be a perfectly light-hearted and  fun concept episode of How I Met Your Mother where Ted and Barney’s future selves tried to convince them to go and see Robots vs Wrestlers (a great call back to season 5) while Marshall and Robin were involved in an all out war over who got a drink named after them that ended in a dance off.  It was a perfectly fluffy episode until things started to take a turn.  It started to get dark when Coat Check Girl from Season One (Free Jayma Mays from Glee!! Also, please give her a sandwich) walked into McClaren’s and Ted seemed to go and talk to her.  We saw the conversation play out with coat check girl’s future selves appearing and essentially saying the relationship is doomed from the beginning because they will eventually end because “that’s how it always works for you, Ted.”

It was like a punch to the stomach.  Little did I know what was coming next.

Because then Barney said to Ted that none of this had ever happened.  That he had actually been sitting in alone in the booth at McClaren’s the whole time because Lily and Marshall were at home with Marvin and Robin and Barney were at their apartment wedding planning.  “Look around you, Ted.  You’re all alone.”  And then future Ted began to reflect on all the things he WOULD have done that night if he had known the future.  He would have gone back to Marshall and Lily’s.  He would have spent time playing middle man in Barney and Robin’s wedding planning.   He would have gone to his own apartment and soak its atmosphere in.  But most of all…he would have gone running to his future wife to tell her that he was going to meet her in 45 days.

Cue me sobbing.

(It was a monologue so perfectly delivered by Josh Radnor that it would win him an Emmy if the voters would pay attention to anyone in this cast other than the brilliant Neil Patrick Harris.)

Some fans found this episode confusing.  I didn’t.  At all.  It’s an episode about the fact that you never know how close you may be to finding happiness.  Ted is in a dark place right now.  All of his close friends are paired off and yet he can’t seem to find anyone that sticks.  He’s losing hope.  He’s feeling like he’s always going to be alone.  And he has NO IDEA how close he is to getting his happy ending.  He has no idea that everything he’s ever wanted is literally just over 6 weeks away.  Future Ted can look back at that night and know how close he was.  We, the viewers, have always known that Ted finds happiness.  But present Ted doesn’t know that.  And that’s why this show is so beautiful.  How I Met Your Mother has always been a show that is about the journey.  It’s NOT really about meeting the mother (though we all WANT to and more importantly we want to see them fall in love), it’s about what it took to become the person that the mother would fall in love with.  It’s about navigating that weird time in your life that is your late twenties and early thirties.  And ultimately it’s a show about hope.  Because even when our characters in the present day don’t have any, we, the viewers, do.  Because we know that it all ends well.

Here’s the thing with me and How I Met Your Mother: I am the exact same age as the characters.  And that’s why I hold them so dear.  They are probably closer to my heart than even my beloved Friends because I have aged along with them and they have felt like my friends.  Their “lives” have so often felt like MY life…to the point where I have often joked that the writers have hidden cameras   Sage astutely put it this way: since Friendsdebuted when we were much younger, it always felt more like a fantasy life  How I Met Your Mother feels more like real life.  With better apartments and wardrobes.

I can admit the show has had some rough patches creatively.  All long running shows do.  But the good ones find their way out of them.  Even in its rougher periodsHIMYM has managed to tug at my heartstrings.  I will be a fan of it for life and I will always defend it and its characters.  It often seems that Ted Mosby is in the middle of most criticisms about the show.  I’ve read complaints that he is the least compelling character on the show.  That’s he’s snobby and douchey and generally just unbearable as a person.

Well.  I’m here to tell you that you are wrong.  Ted Evelyn Mosby is AWESOME.

And I am not just saying that because his journey is the one I tend to identify with the most emotionally.

We’ve seen Ted go on this journey from the idealistic guy in pilot who is love with the IDEA of being in love with someone to a man who is actually READY for marriage and all that it brings in.  It’s been a long journey and one that has gone down some questionable paths.   Ted has been unbearably whiny.  He’s been a smarmy douchebag.  He’s chosen the wrong women (Zooey, Victoria 2.0, this last crazy girl whose name I can’t even remember).  He held on to his feelings for Robin too long.  I’m not denying any of the claims against his character.  But I WILL say that his character HAD to go through all of those things to be fully ready for the woman he’s going to spend the rest of his life with.  He needed to go on this ridiculous and fun and often frustrating path.  And he’s here.  Almost at the end.  At last.  That’s why I was so overwhelmed by the ending of “The Time Travelers”.  I have spent 9 years watching this character grow and struggle and to know that his journey is ALMOST complete is incredibly rewarding.

Hang in there, Teddy Westside.  You are SO close.  And you don’t even know it.

So if his character arc isn’t enough for you, here are ten more reasons why Ted Mosby is awesome…

 He bought his future family home when it was a dilapidated wreck and restored it himself.“Sometimes our best decisions are the ones that don’t make sense at all.”

Ted often makes impulsive choices.  Like buying his “dream house” as a reaction to his mother getting married for a second time (when he hasn’t even been married ONCE!).  His heart, as Marshall so eloquently puts it, is “both drunk and a kid”.

“That’s the thing about stupid decisions – we all make them, but time is funny and sometimes a little magical. It can take a stupid decision, and turn it into something else entirely. Because kids, as you know, that house… is *this* house.”

Ted stealing the blue French Horn on his first date with Robin is one of the most iconic moments of the series.  It shows exactly what kind of guy he is.  He’s the guy who will go to any length to make a girl happy.  Even if it involves larceny.He would have stolen her an entire orchestra.

So I will never hear a word against him.

LOVE LETTER: DEAR SOULMATE

Dear Soulmate,

Ever since my eyes noticed how breath taking you are when you smile, my plans changed. This is too early for me, but you make me wanna lose control over my feelings. Why is that? It’s like you weren’t part of the plan but still I like the fact that you happened. That you came.

But every time I try to picture you beside me, there’s always this voice inside my head that tells me to stop. To get a hold of myself and shake this feeling off before it gets messy. It sucks because now, you’re the reason why I look forward to tomorrows. After quite sometime, I find myself smiling again just because I got a text or something. And I find myself wondering about the possibilities of this so-called “you and me”. You make me wanna write songs about you, make me wanna like give in to whatever bizarre adventure you wanna try. I hate you for making me feel like this. This wasn’t part of the plan. But you make me feel things I thought I’ve already forgotten about. And I’ve no idea how you make me both happy and sad at the same time.

It’s like I want you to know these things but at the same time, I don’t. Cause what if you find this creepy or like what if this would kill all the beautiful things that might happen in the future? But like what if this would clear things up and you’d tell me you feel all these for me too? Just so you know, I am not a fan of this particular thing that I’m feeling right now. I find it weird and scary. But with you, it’s different. It’s like you’re an exception. Goddammit, what did you do to me?

I want to talk to you everyday. I want to hear you sing. I want to see you smile. I want you to read this. I want you to not see this at all. I want you to know. I want you to tweet about me. I want you to blog about me. I want you to say my name and smile for no reason.  I want to know about your day. I want to talk to you on the phone. I want you to call me.  I want assurance. I want you to stay. I want you to be happy. I want to see where this thing goes. I want you. Damn it, I want you.