PERSONAL/LOVE LETTER: DEAR SOULMATE

Dear Soulmate,

Love is a four lettered word they say, that changes you forever. The moment love comes into the equation everything else stops mattering and that one person who makes you feel that way becomes the most important thing ever. You are that one for me, for you have made me realize things that took me a long while to see. I love you and this is something that makes you the most important person in the world for me. I’m so glad to have you.

When I sit here today to try to tell you how I feel I know for sure that love is something that was so difficult to come by. I have never been able to feel, true love, and that changed when I met you. I can still imagine you sitting by the window in that café, and it brings a smile to my face, for in that one fateful glance I knew that it had to be you. I am hopelessly in love with you and I hope that you feel the same way too.

To me you are like that monsoon rain, which makes the parched earth come to like again. Your touch of love has made me feel complete again and that is something that I had thought would never happen. Just when life had broken me down, you walked in and helped me to pick up each piece and try to become whole again. You have filled my heart with such gladness that I know for sure that there is no letting go of you. I love you much more than I can ever tell you and I know that even forever is a short time when it comes to you.

here will never be another one for me. I know it in the bottom of my heart, with certainty the kind that is rare to come by, but when it does you know that things will never be the same again. I had never loved really till the moment that I met you and once that happened I knew things would never be the same again, for you made me realize things that I had been ignoring for so long. You have filled my life with new meanings and for that I pledge to you that I will do everything I possibly can to keep you happy. I love you.

There are things in life that one cannot explain, but then they fit into the bigger scheme of things and you know then that things were meant to be like this. When I met you, I had no idea that things would turn out to be this way, we were two strangers who found each other and realized that love was something that we could live by. I have never been able to love like I have loved you and that makes me sure that we were meant to be and that you are here to stay. I love you.

They say that love is something that makes every other emotion in the world more base and value. I was in much pain and was hurting when you found me, you made me feel whole and secure again. I healed and I knew that you were the one, for only you were able to put my heart at ease. Now that I have you, I just want to let you know that I am never going to let you down or let you go, you mean the world to me and the fact remains that you are the one for me

You are the melody that my heart likes to sing whenever it needs a tune. You are the one who has taught me things that I adhere to now. Not only are you a lover but also my best friend, and this is something that most people wish they had, but I have it and I feel like the luckiest girl alive. You have given me so much that I will never be able to repay you back and that makes me feel grateful to God that he sent you to me. I love you.


There aren’t enough words to describe how much you mean to me, I could tell you that love is something that never came easy to me, but to love you has been the most natural thing to do. From the moment that we first met to today you are the one who makes me smile and makes me feel like, I’m the only one on this planet, whom you can do that for. I feel special to you and that is something that no one can take away from me. I love you


Before you came along into my life, I was a bundle of insecurities, who had been struck by life’s blows and hadn’t taken it too kindly. Just when I’d given up all hope of ever being able to find true happiness and love, I found you and life was beautiful all over again.  So today I want to thank you for being who .you are, and making me feel loved again. You are the reason why I can stand here today and be brave about everything that life has to give. You have made me feel alive again and for that I love you.

I never knew what true love was up until the moment that I found you, I love you much more than anything or anyone on this planet, you are the reason why I have been able to pull through all the hardships that life has thrown at me, I love you much more than anything on this planet and I know that together we can bring out the best in each other. That is the beauty of our love and I’m thankful to god that we have that together with each other. I love you from the bottom of my heart.

PERSONAL/ LOVE LETTER/LOVE LETTER: MY LOVE FOR YOU IS TRULY ETERNAL

Have you ever seen. . .
     into my heart where our love lies?

Have you ever felt. . .
     the blazing sparks that fly between us?

Have you ever touched. . .
     the evening star with our entwined hands?

Have you ever tasted. . .
     empassioned, undying love?

Have you ever smelled. . .
     the fragrance that reminds you of me?

Have you ever heard. . .
     our love strike up a song?

Have you ever. . .
     felt like this before?

Have you ever. . .
     I have!


 Please gift my world to me by being mine forever.

Your love, your care, your support and faith, have made me a better person. I promise you all the happiness, fun and love in life. Be mine forever.


I love to lie down in your arms and listen to your heart beats. It makes me feel that there is someone in this world, whose heart beats only for me. I just can't stop loving you.


After I met you, I found life and a reason to live it. Your smiling face means the world to me. Please gift my world to me by being mine forever.


When I am with you, I am full of life. You make me feel special, you are my heart, soul and world. Please be with me forever.


You are the one, whom I think about while I go to bed, and the reason I blush while listening to love stories. I love you.


I love absolutely everything about you. But the thing I love the most is, the way you make me smile even while you are not around. I'm so madly in love with you.


When you hug me, it makes me forget the world outside. I feel so special and so loved. No one in this world can make me feel this way. I love you.


You encourage me, advice me, love me and spoil me. Most of all you my love, you bring out the best in me. I love you.


When around you, I don't need to be someone else. Thank you for loving me, for who I am.


You are one of those rare dreams after which, one always wakes up smiling. I love you my dear.


You complete my life and make it so worth living. Girl, you are nothing but an angel to me. I love you.


Every time you look into my eyes, it makes me fall in love with you all over again. You are the most beautiful person I have ever met. I'm honored to have you in my life. I love you.


I will love you even if it hurts, because baby you are the one I love the most. I love you.


I'm sending hugs and kisses to you baby, along with a promise I will love you forever.


I cannot put into words what you mean to me. I just love you way too much. I love you like crazy!


Another month, another year, another smile, another tear, another winter, another summer too but there will never be another you!


Some are pretty, some are cute, some have the eyes, some have the looks. Beauty is something that cannot be defined, But if it could be defined, in you it would be confined.


Everyday with you feels like a dream. No matter where I go or what I do, you are the last thought that puts me to sleep each night and the first thought that wakes me up every morning. I love my life because, it has you.


You make me so happy, happier than I have ever been. I can search and search, but I will never be able to find someone who brings a smile to my face the way you do. I love you so much.


I could do anything to bring a smile on your face that I love so much. I can't express my feelings for you. I love you more than you can imagine. I just love you a lot.


I fall In love all over again. Every time I see you.


Let's drive into the sunset. Sing love songs. We'll made promises and swear we'll never love somone else.


True love never dies. It only gets stronger with time.


Love isn't finding someone you can live with... It's finding someone you can't live without.


Love is when you don't want to go to sleep. Bcoz reality is better than a dream.


In love it is better to know and be disappointed than not to know and always wonder.


Love means giving up the one thing that keeps you alive. Your heart.


Behind every successful man is a woman – whoever said this is 100 percent right. You're the secret behind my success, my dear wife. I love you.


Every time I look into your eyes, I remind myself how wonderful my life is. To the most beautiful wife in the whole world, I love you!


I often pinch myself to check if I am dreaming. It's unbelievable for me to have such perfect life and a perfect wife like you. I love you darling.


You have been the first and will be the only one ever to touch my heart. Ever since the day I met you, my heart stopped beating for me. It beats for you, saying I love you with every beat.


I cannot get by a single day without looking into your pretty eyes and feeling the warm touch of your hands. What can I say, I am addicted to your love.


If life with you is so beautiful and heavenly, I might be disappointed with what the heavens have to offer later! Thanks for making every day of my life a joy to live. I love you.


With you by my side, I feel like I am the luckiest man alive to have the most pretty, understanding and loving wife. I look forward to the wonderful years ahead in our lives. I love you!


Every morning I wake up only because I look forward to spending another day with a beautiful princess like you. I love you.


The best day in my life was the day I married you
The best thing in my life is you
I cannot imagine a single day without you
I've said it once, and I'll say it again
I love you!!


I think that the Gods must have been asleep the day you were born. Only then would they have let such a beautiful angel escape to earth! I love you.


Holding you in my arms and spending a few moments hugging you is all I need after a hectic day's work. You are like a healing soul that drives away worries, pains and aches. How could I have ever lived without you my darling?


I don't think I will ever be able to compensate for how much you have tolerated me all these years. I just want thank you and tell you that you mean the world to me. Thanks for making my life worthy of living. I love you.


You are like wine because you get sweeter as the years go by. You are becoming prettier day by day and your ever youthful beauty still makes me feel weak in the knees every time I see you. I love you sweetheart!


Your beautiful eyes take me to a land far away where there is only love, happiness, joy and smiles everywhere. Your pretty lips remind me of your sizzling touch. I feel like a teenager in love when I see you. I just want to say I Love You to the most gorgeous woman on earth.


My love, I don't know how I can ever thank you for being such a caring and understanding person that you are. I just hope I can keep you happy all your life. I love you.


My love for you is deeper than the deepest ocean
Taller than the tallest mountain
Hotter than the hottest desert
And denser than the densest of forests
My love for you is truly eternal
I love you


I want to love you more than forever because even eternity is not enough time for me to express my love for you.


I am afraid of death not because I fear death itself. I am afraid of death because I know that even the heavens cannot be as beautiful as you. I love you my dear wife!


Your love is food for my heart, mind and soul without which I cannot survive a single second. You know my heart beats for you and only you. My darling wife, I love you.


I won't trade even a second spent with you for a billion dollars because every second of my life that I spend with you is priceless.


All my friends are jealous because I have such a loving and wonderful person like you in my life. Let's enjoy our togetherness to the fullest, darling. I love you!


When I first met you
I fell for you
Today all I want in life is you
I love you!


Every moment spent away from you feels like a thorn digging deep into my heart. Come closer and make the thorns go away sweetheart. You are the rose of my life!


The day I met you has been the best day of my life because I realized the true meaning of love. My life is incomplete without you honey. I love you.


I believe in God, I believe in miracles and I believe in angels, because it is a miracle that the Gods sent an angel like you in my life. Love you darling.


I have stopped making wishes on spotting falling stars. Do you know why? Because I have you and that's all I want in my life.


I want you to know that I am yours today, tomorrow and forever. I never knew what true love was until I met you. I love you dear.


Even after all these years together I get goose bumps when you look into my eyes. I feel like a teenager gushing with love every time I see you. You make me forever youthful. I love you!


I share my life with you not because I have to but because I can't live without you.


If a genie told me that I had 3 wishes and I could ask for anything I wanted, do you know what I'd ask for? A lifetime of your love, a lifetime of your touch and a lifetime of you and only you. I love you!


True happiness, true satisfaction and true love are the 3 important lessons that I've learnt after you came in my life. I hope our bond stays strong forever and ever!


My heart loves you like a candle. It burns and beats only to shower love for you, just like a candle sacrifices itself to give light in darkness. The only difference is that my heart will love you until eternity!


Not a single day of my life goes by without thinking about how I can make your life happier. I love you sweetheart and I want to do everything I can to make your life a pleasure, every single day.


You make me feel warm, safe and loved. You are the blanket that I want wrapped around me all the time. I just want to say that I love you and thanks for being there for me all the time.


If loving you was a crime, I am guilty for life. I love you!


I dreamt of loving a person as sweet as you
I dreamt of a relationship just like the one I have with you
I dreamt of a life just the way I live with you
Do dreams ever come true?
Yes they do because I found you
I love you!


Every day I pray for your success, prosperity and happiness because my happiness lies in yours. Love you darling.


I'd rather die in your arms than live a life without you. I love you more than forever!


Morning, afternoon, night
Today, tomorrow and forever
All I need and want is you
I love you!


If love was a disease, I want to suffer all my life because I love you till no end.

*PERSONAL:IF YOU HAVE NEVER LOVED OR BEEN LOVED, YOU WON'T UNDERSTAND *

First off, I must declare that I am not a serial killer. Nor am I, by any stretch of the imagination, ugly. Though, if you walked into a crowded club, I might not be the first one you’d grind on, or the second for that matter. In fact, I would very likely stand in the corner all night checking my phone and wondering why I even bothered to leave my Netflix queue unattended.

Still, despite being (completely?) sane and of slightly above average attractiveness, I’m single.

I don’t know where you live, but I’m pretty sure there are no castles around here for you to lock yourself in with a dragon so I can finally meet you.... Not to mention that such a feat would undeniably cause me to miss my early Monday morning meeting, as the traffic from Happily Ever After would be dreadful, I’m sure.

So, due to lack of castles, I’ve had to settle for a more modern approach to searching for Princess...ONLINE. So, if the movies, books and songs are so right, how come when we find the one, we can still feel like we're missing something? Why are there married people who are lonely with an emptiness that marriage can't fill? Our hearts can get confused if our reality doesn't match fantasy and we wonder:

I understand that dating can be hard, even maddeningly frustrating. It takes time and commitment, and online dating is no different.  You’re going to have a lot of false starts and connections that seem to start wonderfully and then trail off for no apparent reason. Dating is a lot like the lottery.  You hope that fate will guide you to THAT ONE SPOT you need to be AT THAT VERY SPECIFIC TIME in order to meet that special someone. It's no different real life as it online. I know that I am handsome,successful,and kind single man looking for Ms. Right.

One day you meet someone and for some inexplicable reason, you feel more connected to this stranger than anyone else--closer to them than your closest family. Perhaps this person carries within them an angel--one sent to you for some higher purpose; to teach you an important lesson or to keep you safe during a perilous time. What you must do is trust in them--even if they come hand in hand with pain or suffering--the reason for their presence will become clear in due time

I am single right now because I am tired of wasting time with women who won’t make a commitment to me. I am totally frustrated with the dating scene. Scared to date again because the last "Dream Woman" turned out to be a nightmare.  And I'm not just going to throw yourself at a woman just to get her attention and beside..i just don't have the time to date so many people.I can guarantee you with every fiber of my being, I am not desperate. I will met only someone who I feel is worth the time away from my day to day, my friends, my career, my work out schedule, etc.

Do you want to date jerk after jerk after scum bag that makes you unhappy so all you know is what a failed relationship looks like, or do you want to learn how to build respectful, nurturing relationships? Do you want practice picking up players and cheaters, or do you want to get good at finding nice guys that will treat you right? Do you want to be so heartbroken that you give up on love completely or do you want to someday look back at all your past relationships and have no regret?

Somehow, out of all the twists and turns our lives could have been, and out of all the chances we might have missed, it almost seems like we were given a meant - to - be moment - to meet, to get to know each other, and to set the stage for a special togetherness.

If you have never loved or been loved, you won’t understand or relate to  what I am going to share. If you have then maybe you might understand the way I feel or not. And maybe you have felt this way before or maybe not. The things is at the very beginning of any online relationship, it is only my words that can make an effect on you. No physical contact, no voices, no scents – only the words that I write that will connect you to me until the two of us make a step forward to seeing each other in the real life. It is only with an open and incautious heart that you will allow my words to enter your soul and let yourself to fall in love with me.

Your feelings of aloneness dissolve as you realize that you are “all one” with all things and that you are profoundly connected with everyone. At the deepest level everything and everyone is your soul mate. All of life is the One Source manifesting as a multiplicity of form. The person behind these words right now is giving you the opportunity to open your heart more fully, heal more deeply, and love more freely.

From the very beginning from reading my words...i hope that you will experience a profound empathy and compassion for me and you will voluntarily let your guard down. You will feel as safe as if you had entered an extraordinary comfort zone where it is not necessary to play mind games or word games. You knowingly strip away any defenses you have created around yourself and let me feel your soul.


I am not perfect by a long shot but I am hoping that I may be perfect for you.  I could fill this little space with loves and hates but what would we have to talk about over coffee? If you turn the page now we may have both just lost something meaningful. Write me something and lets see where it goes from there. What have we got to lose? except possibly a life with someone you enjoy. For me...I would like to meet my best friend, Because...If you don't fall in love with your best friend, You always think there could be better.

I'm not your pen pal. I'm not your back up plan. There's a reason why I have shades in my pictures here, but it's not because  I am unattractive...its because of privacy.

You should message me if you enjoy good morning texts and goodnight phone calls. You are educated and financially stable 

You really are the type of person that you say you are, instead of claiming that you're the person that you want to be. 

You don't complain about hating the way people treat others, when in fact you're the person who does everything you claim to hate. 

You call me when you say you're going to call me 

You follow through with everything you tell me

You don't tell me things just because you think it's what I wants to hear just to make yourself look good. 

You're straight forward and honest




REPEAT

Men have a very fair assessment of women’s overall attractiveness. Like in a normal bell curve, 5% of the women were found to be the least attractive and 5% were found to be the most attractive, with most women falling in the middle 90%.

It’s women, not men, who have unrealistic standards for the “average” member of the opposite sex.Women, on the other hand, rate 80% of men as below average.Let me repeat: It’s women, not men, who have unrealistic standards for the “average” member of the opposite sex.

It's a  stark realization when you see just how few men woman even find to be average looking.


I read — and have read — A LOT of women’s profiles — and most women seem to be describing — in terms of looks — the SAME guy — a very George Clooney / Jon Hamm type guy — 6 feet plus, head of hair (no matter what age), athletic, handsome (“I want to feel goosebumps when he walks into a room” etc.).

I have lived on the upper west side  and I rarely, rarely see any guys who come close to that type — I moved to Long Island and didn’t see any guys who looked like that…. I went on vacation in Florida and there was only ONE guy I saw who look like what most woman want.

But don’t get me wrong I am quite realistic about the kind of woman I can attract.  On one particular dating site, you have the option of having your pictures evaluated by other members, where you are rated on a scale of 1-10 in terms of looks.  I thought what to heck — let them rate me.  And as I remembered, my average rating was a 7.8, according to the others members.


Maybe something’s just wrong with me? Generally speaking, if someone is interested in me and seems to have enough in common with me (in terms of future plans, beliefs, morals, et al), I’ll go out with her.

None of the woman I’ve dated look anything like one another, as I’m not so much interested in a “look” or a “type” as I am who they are. A lot of my  guy friends will wonder why I’m with a woman because they’ll think she is  “unattractive” or “not in my league.” But a woman’s looks haven’t ever been the top attribute I seek when searching for a partner.

When it comes to being too picky.  The main reasons I rate so many people poorly are the following, in roughly descending order of importance/frequency:

Profile writing quality is poor (proxy for “low intelligence”)
Profile too short (< 400 words)
Obese
Single mother
Not a college graduate

I’m more of the guy next door type, so I’d rather be with a good hearted, fun loving, respectful caring woman — and if she happens to be a 9 or 10, whatever. I’m not all that pressed. My past girlfriend  makes me laugh constantly and treats me well. Because of those reasons, she’s sexy to me.  Isn’t that all that matters?  I also realize that the attraction won’t be based just on looks; I’ve gotta have the whole package! So, in my world, average-looking woman who seem intelligent and show themselves to have the important qualities like loyalty and integrity quickly become a 10.

I write not to the women whom I think are in the “top 10%” (or 5% or 20% or whatever), but instead to the women whom I find attractive going from their profiles (and who, I think from looking at their preferences, might go for me). I’m not positive how all the other men rate the women I write to, but I do hope that I am able to outshine the competition and get the attention of these women.

POETRY: THE DEPTH OF MY BEING

You are everything I've ever wanted,
My one and only dream.
We share many wonderful memories
and they will always remain.
So, sweetheart, after times have passed
We shall look back upon these wonderful memories
and remember what a great love we shared.
But don't worry, as we look back
We shall look back together.
Because, you are mine, now and forever...


2

If I could be with you today
 You would make me say
How much I want to stay with you
 For all my life until my dying day
But until that day all I will say
 Is that I love you in every way


3


If I
close my eyes
eternity
may just
vanish

Won't you
kiss me
till
sleep
prevails
to steal
this moment?



4

So many different feelings I'm feeling.
I don't know, actually, how to say what they are.
I wished, dreamed, and hoped that you feel the same way.
I just wish I could know, but you are so far away.
I will tell you one day, just don't know when,
That I love you so.........


5

Without you I'd lose concentration.
I'd loose a whole heart and inspiration.
Is it strong enough to last,
or are we just going way too fast.

The feelings I have- the emotions I show,
should be strong enough to let you know,
Just what you can count on from me;
forever and faithfully.

When I look at you, my soul shines through my eyes.
I tell you no story-I tell you no lies.
The way I feel sometimes makes me cry.
Because I know I'll always love you, even if you say goodbye.

I trust you just as much as I possibly can.
I still trusted you when you did things I didn't understand.
If my mind says go, but my heart says stay,
do I love you, or walk away.

If my heart is right then what I feel,
is no longer a dream- it has become real.
If my mind is right then I am to blame,
because it told me all along you guys are all the same.

I think you love me but I can't tell,
because I love you so much- just listen to how hard I fell.
I hear my heart in the sunshine- I hear it in the rain.
It's calling me so loudly- it's calling out your name.

I love you, yes I do... let me say it louder again.
Maybe you'll hear it then.
When you hear those words believe they are true.
Because they are the only three words I admit to.

No else could make me feel the way you do,
...that's why I love you.



6

The night I met you I knew
I never wanted to lose you.
So I followed my heart and soul
And fell in love with all you do.

The way your big, brown eyes
Seem to see straight inside of me
I get lost, I'm mesmerized
But there's no place else I'd rather be.

The way I feel when your lips touch mine
You take my breath away.
I cherish every second I am with you
But there's never enough time in a day.

The way you hold me in your arms
I can feel your heart beating next to mine
I melt into you when you whisper in my ear
That we'll make it; that we'll be just fine.

 

7

If I could find words to describe
What my heart feels inside.
I'd write this poem just for you
But nothing I can say would ever do.
 
Words don't show the depth
Of what my heart has kept.
Or my feelings that I hold deep within
For that person who is more than just a friend.

Love, is not quite enough strong
For the words that I long.
For it is you that's my heart's desire
You started this flame that has set me on fire.

Your name is whispered from my lips
With the softness of feather tips.
But how could I ever let you know
Just what my heart wants to show.

No words or rhymes can ever express
These feelings I hold, softly caressed.
In my heart you will always be
That someone special for eternity.


8


Clouds embraced the sky
Waves touched the sand
When I said that I
Want to live in your land

My life began when you said
You are the one I need
This love all we've tried
Look at my eyes to read
Words, stronger than every stone
Poems, in letters of gold
Massages, sent from the unknown
Secrets that have never been told

Looking at you
All the time
Eyes so bright
Face like a moon
Hair like night
Girl, you are so beautiful
God, thank you for this miracle



9


Many battles have I waged

Against my feelings for you.

Yet still, I find my heart caged

Unjustly by something I can't subdue.

Resistance has gained me no leverage.

In fact, it has caused me not but pain.

Maybe through acceptance I may salvage

A portion of my strength to explain.

You are the one I love and you'll never know.

Undeniable it is that forever shall I

Regret not telling you so,

In fear of your reply.



10



Do you ever dream,
Stay up at night wondering what could happen the next day?
Do you see the stars
and wish you could just grab one and keep it?
Do you see the moon
and talk to the man that lives in it?

Does he answer?
What does he say?

Why do you stay up and dream?
Do you not know what you want?
Is something on your mind and just won't go away?
Is there something like that star you want to have?

Is the man in the moon that someone you want to talk to and be close to?
Why, then, is it if you wonder these things you never try to get them?
Are you afraid?
Or is it that one night you looked at the stars and one just faded away.
Or is it that one night the man in the moon didn't answer you.

If this did happen,
Why do you still dream?
Why do you still stay up and wonder?
Why do you still look at the stars?
Why do you still talk to the man in the moon?

Is it that someone or something is still there?
But it was that something's star that burned out
And it was that person that stop talking to you.

Whatever it is, I want you to know...
I can't give you the stars but you can keep me and I will keep you.
I can't sit in the moon at night, but I can listen and I will answer.
Let me be your stars and your man in the moon.
Because I will never fade away, and I will never stop answering you.



11

hat have I done...
To deserve such a wonderful sight...
An angel without flight...

You walk upon this earth...
No wanting to go back home...
Up to the Heavens that you belong to...

What made you stay...
How did you be come astray...
Were you sent down here for me...

That is something that I don't understand...
How such a precious angel as thee...
Could now only belong to me...

Am I keeping you confined...
To this harsh place in time...
Or do you feel the same as me...

That I have a bit of Heaven on earth...
You have brought me more joy than anyone...
You love me fully...

You are the only one ...
That I can confide in...
Knowing that all is safe with you...

You are my friend...
You are my love...
You are all that I have ever dreamed of...

You will stay always...
In your eyes all I see is love...
And now you shall feel no more pain...

You will be free from the mortal way...
Living to feel hurt...
Living for the pain...

Instead of all that...
You have confided in me...
And now you will see...

All that I could ever want...
Ever need...
All I love lies in thee...



12

Take a rainbow.. split the multitude of colors apart.
Then you might just know how I feel in my heart.
For each single hue that is split from the bow
Would represent love I've not shown but, am willing to show.
Love can surely be shown in so many ways.
Just in small things we do, in each of our days.
Doesn't have to be spectacular or, something that's grand,
Just little signs of love so that you'll understand,
That you are the one that makes life worth living for.
And it's you, all my days, I'll cherish and adore,
Though it would take a lifetime for the colors to come through,
I'd show you a color each day as I live life with you.
Hope you open your eyes to this beautiful light
And remember the colors of love through each day and night.
And the rainbow will, one day, fully appear
As a sign of our love we've shared through the years.



13


Within the hollow of my heart,
the 'knowing' rests patiently.
Yet, the wait wears upon my thought,
and the other world of shallow minds 
seeks to weaken the truth.

How safe and warm is the 'knowing' 
when our souls and bodies blend in perfection.
Soft words whispered in the light, strengthen the joy of my being
and, in rememberence, taunt me with doubt and fear.

In the humanness of  my past, my own worthiness is questioned 
and seeks to corrode what is true.
I seek for patience and courage, 
to the one whose eyes shine, so gently, upon me...
whose smile I gaze upon adoringly 
and whose love bears down into the depth of my being.

So, the wait becomes a test of swords 
where the truth seeks to outwit the imagination 
in a prayer that the rainbow follows the rain.
I know we are meant to be..to love..to laugh..to cry..to heal 
and to relax into each other's arms.

Yet, the wait wears upon my thought 
as the other world of shallow minds 
seeks to weaken the truth

PERSONAL/DATING/LOVE: DATING IS SO FUCKEN HARD

Online dating is such a difficult endeavor for men, even when you’re gorgeous like me.  If there’s no visual attraction right off the bat, it’s very difficult to spark attraction, unless the effort is made to meet in real life and on a regular basis to see if we can click from there.  Most women will not bother, partly because they get bombarded by prospects and hence have to find a way to quickly filter out undesirables, so only the top alphas of the alphas are going to make the cut (and sometimes not even.)  If you don’t look good and your profile is badly written and generic, it’s out with you.  And since I’m a dude and thus especially visually oriented, if the photos don’t depict even a mildly pretty girl, it doesn’t matter what their profile says, I quickly click on to the next profile.

Although sometimes I try to force myself to dig a little deeper, if a girl seems kinda cute, I’ll read their profiles to see if there’s anything that might offer the promise of chemistry:  similar interests, beliefs, personalities, etc..  This is where propinquity comes in.  The attraction is very meager, but with physical contact and compatible personalities something might eventually spark.
.

Once I was out of college there was only the work place and the bar/social scene where one can regularly meet and interact with women and i don't really drink.  There are no single girls at my job, and I eschew the social scenes  for a variety of reasons, so the prospects of benefitting from a propinquity driven attraction were daunting indeed.  My life as a deep-seated introvert meant I’ve had to rely on the initial, immediate spark of attraction more than the average person would probably need to.

Via a combination of laziness and idealism, I let the fallacy of  believing that the right girl will simply love me for whom I am, and not based on how I looked or presented myself in public.  And I would still agree, BUT if I’m a complete stranger to her and I’m not giving her ANY incentive to get to know me better then it wouldn’t matter who I was.  I don’t need to be Don Juan, but I don’t have to go dousing any sexual appeal I had with a fire hose either.

I guess this means I can’t take anything for granted when I go out.  Even if it’s a midnight run to 7-11, I should still go looking my best, and not sporting say, a stained undershirt and lounge pants like I used to.  Or like I’ve seen some guys do, go out wearing SLIPPERS.  *face palm*  Although when I see that, I wonder if the competition isn’t nearly as bad as I think it is.

In the meantime I can try to find at least ONE social group or circle out there that I can participate in or whatnot  but ironically, I find that an even more daunting prospect than meeting a sweet girl by chance while squeezing my melons at the local supermarket.




PART 2

Single women who are older (30s, 40s) are generally less attractive than their younger counterparts.  I never say they have nothing to offer, or that they are not attractive at all, just less so compared to younger women.  And since there are trolls that like to come on here and tell me that I could never attract young women because I’m an old fogie or something, I think this is a fair point to make.

I think what happens is that for some women, they have this enormous checklist by which they evaluate men, and as they get older, rather than relax their standards a bit, they continue to peruse the same checklist, looking for that perfect man.  Then they become imbued with rage when they see high-value men near their age still dating women who are much younger, thus declaring all men shallow and not worthy of their spit.

It’s a catch-22 proposition though.  These perfect suitors they so desire will, by their very perceived perfection and “high market value”, be able to date much younger women.  Why date a 40 year old when you can still date a 25 year old just as easily?  The ones who can’t attract younger women just as easily will be the leftovers such older women STILL reject, because they’re fat, bald, stuck in dead-end jobs, etc.  Who’s being shallow again?

I reckon a lot of woman have checklist is a mile long, and includes such requirements that men might have no control over, such as their height.  But I’m the shallow one?

This is what bothers me.  It’s not that I don’t mind women disqualifying men based on things that could be considered shallow (such as the guy’s eye color or height.)  We all have our preferences and ideals.  It’s that they LIE about this, painting themselves as moral queens who insist they are attracted to men based on their virtues, whereas men use looks, (and ONLY looks) to evaluate suitable women.

Attraction and evaluation are two different things though (which I’ll get to in a bit).  When it comes to pure attraction, men are visually oriented.  Women can’t seem to abide by this, but it’s a scientific fact.  It’s how we’re wired.  Even worse, women may deny (in order to maintain their moral superiority complex) that they are not visually oriented, despite rejecting men who are short, have balding hair and a flabby body.  On top of this, society (as driven by feminism) perpetuates the lie that women are attracted to men based on virtue, being emotionally sensitive, and being respectful of women (which really means pedestalizing them and supplicating their every desire).  You know, the NICE GUY.  The real truth (in a nutshell) is that women are attracted to men who are strong and dominant.  A nice guy can be strong and dominant, but usually they unwittingly present themselves as being wussies, which is a major turnoff.  Showing how sensitive you are by bawling your eyes out watching Sleepless in Seattle does not attract women.  They are actually repulsed by this.  Yet because we’ve been told over and over that women are attracted to a man’s “heart” and the notion of being attracted to someone who projects masculine strength and leadership is sexist, this simple but suppressed truth flies over the head of many clueless men (including me as well.)

Attraction is something that in many respects is hard-wired into our being.  Women are attracted to masculine, strong and powerful men, whereas men are attracted to women who are feminine, submissive, soft and pretty.  THERE IS NOTHING WRONG WITH THIS.

Once we all start admitting to each other the reality of what attracts us to each other, we can finally move on to the issue of what we DO with that attraction.

For example, my standard for attraction is simple:   1) Is she pretty?  2) Does she have a pleasant personality?

But of course, that’s not enough to determine if she can make a suitable girlfriend/wife.  Ok, so yeah, she’s hot, BUT:  Is she, modest, kind, empathic and willing to put my interests ahead of hers?  And *ahem* is she a good cook?  ;-)

I love to use that line by the way, because nothing sets certain women off faster than asking them if they can cook.  Their attitude and response often tells me a lot about how they view men, and when they bristle at the idea of doing ANYTHING that might benefit a man (such as making him a nice lasagna) and launch into this screed about how women are strong and independent, I can consider her radioactive and steer clear.

I see this attitude all the time too, not directed at me so much, but to men in general.  There’s a sort of gynocentric trend in Western culture where such women feel put off at the very idea of behaving in ways that might please or benefit men.  The presumption is that this yields a one way relationship: it’s all about men and their needs, while a women’s needs are irrelevant.

So hence, when women read my posts about what I look for in a wife, their reaction is to create a false dichotomy by accusing me of wanting a Stepford wife who becomes my domestic slave, scrubbing toilets and whatnot.

Which is ironic, because I don’t like the idea of my wife scrubbing toilets anyway.  It sounds like a man’s job to me (anything that involves getting down and dirty, yep sounds like a man’s job.)  So when I use the word domestic, what comes to mind is a woman who can complement those areas that are major weaknesses of mine, such as interior decorating.  I wouldn’t know how to decorate a home if Martha Stewart took up residence in my brain and started directing me (when she’s not busy insider trading that is, tee hee).   Or being a smart shopper and working through the byzantine maze of coupons, reward points, etc. to maximize every dollar spent like a pro.  Or turning the backyard into a veritable garden of Eden with her gardening skills (whereas I have been known for my ability to murder cactus plants in the space of a week.)  And yes of course, being an excellent cook.  Women typically love this, and for proof you need not look further than Pinterest, which is predominantly driven by a female demographic.  What do you often see there?  Pictures of recipes, fashion, gardening, household related things, and of course, SHOES.

Now in regards to a woman’s standard for attraction, once you take away all the pretty lies, it’s almost quite as simple as my standard:  1) Is he strong?  2)  Is he dominant?

Women are attracted to those traits (and the many different ways they manifest themselves), but upon that initial attraction, if she follows the same process I do, she’ll also recognize that attraction alone doesn’t make a suitable mate.  Can he be a good provider?  Does he have excellent morals?  Does he demonstrate initiative and leadership?  Is he ambitious?  Does he have a good work ethic?  Will he put my needs and interests ahead of his own as well?

Where things get dicey is when women claim they are looking for equals and expect to be treated as equals, yet in reality they look for men who are willing to take charge in a relationship.  (In other words, their actions don’t line up with what they say.)  The following is an easy example of what women say they want, and what I believe women really want:

If a nice guy behaves according to what women assert they want from men, equality and “respect”, whereas, the nice guy (but one who is strong and dominant) takes CHARGE and commands the relationship.  I’m being hyperbolic of course, but this ability to take the initiative is what most women are highly attracted to.  It’s just one of the many ways a man can project masculine strength and evoke strong attraction in women.

Why exactly is this trait so attractive?  Because it’s not so much about women being submissive, but about a man lifting the burdens of decision-making from her shoulders.  Leadership is not a perk of life, it actually carries with it grave responsibilities and can be a huge cross to bear.  To carry that burden so she doesn’t have to is one of the ways a husband can honor his wife.

While it’s disconcerting to see women sometimes SCREECH at me on  about what a hatemonger I am.  I never expect it to be a one way proposition where she does everything for me and I do nothing for her, which is just silly.  I think the reason it comes across that way is because I’m constantly examining the worst traits of female behavior and pointing out what changes in behavior would be needed in order to make them more attractive to men in general (as well as me, personally).  I don’t delve much into what I need to change about myself, because I already know the answers.  I have faith in my capacity to truly love a wife the way she needs and deserves to be loved (a capacity that doesn’t come from within, but from God), yet I’m highly cynical that I’d ever meet a girl who isn’t so consumed with batting for Team Women, and is instead more interested in batting for Team Her Man. Not that they don’t exist, but that their numbers are small, and within that number meeting someone compatible with my personality and is even smaller.

Does it make me sad?  Sure.  But I’ve also been blessed to live a life free of the drama of settling for someone who sees me as a meal ticket (via alimony and child support) rather than as a husband.



PART 3

I think it all comes down to one simple truth. Each person has the right to choose a mate based on his or her own criteria. As long as you’re being honest to both yourself and the others you meet along the way, you should be able to choose whatever qualities are most attractive to you.. Your perfect mate is out there somewhere, and you have no need to defend the qualities you’re looking for.

As for me, I’m holding out for an intelligent woman who would enjoy being surrounded by books and movies and a loyal man who will always stand by her. Honestly, looks aren’t that important to me. They matter a little, of course, but the other qualities are much more important. Sense of humor is at the top of the list for me as well. Show me an intelligent, caring woman a good sense of humor, a larger than life book collection, and a love to cook, and I will gladly propose! *LOL*


I used to fall for that line as well, that women aren’t so hung up on looks, but after you see enough fat or bald or otherwise ugly men getting nuclearly rejected, it’s obvious looks matter just as much to women.

I’ll never forget the commercials I used to see where they sell hair coloring products to dye a man’s beard or mustache so he looks younger. They show the first scene where a guy with a gray beard gets rejected by a hot girl, then the second scene where he dyes his beard, and suddenly the hot girl is all over him. LOL So looks AND age is a factor. It is what it is.

A guy in his forties “with options” could go for a 40 year old, but because he’s an “alpha” he’s going to pull attraction from all kinds of women, so even if he’s older, he’ll still have the pick of the litter, and it’s unlikely he’ll pick someone his age. The best chance a woman has to marry and find a suitable man is during her most attractive years, but too many spend those years investing in careers and completely blowing off men, thinking they’ll be just as attractive in their 30s as they were in their 20s, but when they find they don’t nearly draw men the way they used to, well, they go cray cray with rage and bitterness. It’s another reason why it’s good to marry early, and when you’re in an environment where you’re surrounded by tons of single men.

If I had known the desolation that would be the dating market once I left college, I would have asked every girl out in every class until I found someone. But hey, back then I thought I had all the time in the world. Ugh. See, it’s not just women who fall into that mental trap. :-P



PART 4

I always thought being a nice guy, showing chivalry and maturity, giving girls flowers, being romantic, etc. attracted women, but it doesn’t. They kept insisting that this is what attracts them to men, so I kept doing it, and yet still continued to see women fall for the worst elements on earth. Are they just being immature? Yes, but it’s more than that, and once I understood, I finally realized there was an inherent logic to seeing them fall for the biker dude or the guy who just got out of prison after all, and no longer took it personally. What I didn’t understand before is all those things that I did that women told me they loved is not what sexually attracts women. They may find these things ADMIRABLE, but it does NOT sexually attract them. I had to ALREADY be attractive to a girl for things like maturity, romance and so on to really pay off in a relationship. They are important to building a long lasting marriage, but they don’t induce attraction. And how can I build a relationship if I can’t even attract anyone?

I agree that women do like maturity, and that the smart ones make this a huge qualifier when seeking a good husband, but maturity doesn’t sexually attract a woman to a man either. You see how I’m making a distinction here? There’s sexual attraction, and then there are those ingredients that make a long lasting relationship.

Going back to the age thing, women who are younger have a higher sexual allure than older women do. Decent men will still gravitate to younger women in general because it’s a biological impulse, but as you alluded, some of them will just throw up their hands in frustration when the younger ones continue to prove themselves as immature, self absorbed, etc., and thus obviously wouldn’t make good wives, so they date older women, (so long as they still find such women sexually attractive).

I believe attraction creates a spark, and from that you can potentially get a relationship going. At some point the bond of a relationship starts to supersede the physical bond of sexual attraction, so even when looks fade, the two are just as drawn to each other as they were at the beginning of their relationship. But this is something that takes time to build (years even).




PART 5

I think too many women can’t understand how they can achieve happiness by making their men happy. Feminism is misandry at its core, it’s not about equality or egalitarian roles but about emasculating and denigrating men, and they can deny this until they’re blue in the face but it doesn’t change the reality. I was accused of insecurity before, I think the real insecurity is being demonstrated by women who are terrified of the notion that by letting a man take the lead or a headship role in a relationship/marriage they somehow lose their identity. This is why a marriage can never truly be a cohesive unit of one when such a mentality exists.

Once a girl is beholden to me, I’m responsible for her life and her happiness. That’s a huge burden to carry and it means making sacrifices where I must consider her (and whatever family we have) ahead of my own interests. Women who absorb the harmful facets of feminism just don’t feel they need to make a similar sacrifice in return, because nearly anything that could be construed as an act that would benefit a man is regarded as sexism and chauvinism.