LOVE/PERSONAL/THOUGHTS: HOW DO YOU LET GO OF SOMETHING SO IMPORTANT

I am one of those "single guys.” that people always said, “We have to get you married” or “You're such a great catch, why aren’t you married”. Of course, someone always had a suggestion of a great woman. I was happy people still thought of me but it was actually pretty tiresome and exhausting. Despite the optimism and encouragement of others, I started to lose hope. Scores of dates over the years had worn me out.

We go through hell on earth to meet someone, elicit their details, spend ages and ages chatting, emailing, messaging, writing, phoning and then we go dating. And then we go dating again. And it comes to nothing. And ultimately dating fatigue sets in...Emotionally drained, high hopes, low results and I just know that I can't only be the only one feeling this way.The single factor that crops up more than anything is lying. People tell lies, they tell me what I want to hear, they pretend to be something they aren't and they avoid the truth about things they shouldn't. Not everyone does that, but a great many do. Its because many people don't feel happy about themselves, they want to be something larger than life, they want to impress me. It's the same story..they travel there ...ate here...ect..That is a turn off.

So, maybe I didn't eat my Wheaties today, but. I'm tired of "So what do you do?" and "Do you have brothers or sisters?" and "How old are your kids?". I'm tired of liking women who don't like me, and being liked by women who creep me out. I'm tired of updating my profile with new photos and I'm tired of making witty repartee on the phone with a complete stranger. I'm tired of getting all excited before I meet her only to be confronted with the alarmingly disingenous lies she told to get me there. I'm tired of being polite but bored out of my SKULL for 30-45 minutes. I'm tired of being judged, and I'm tired of judging them. I WISH that I could just tell myself, "OK, I quit." Sometimes I do. But then, a week or a month, well, I un-hide my profile and here I go again.

Too many times I’d either wasted my time or gotten my hopes up – only to be disappointed.They want to see more picture. They want to see if there is chemistry. They are so much cautious out there. It doesn't seem they want to invite love in their life. What happen to the person who want finds personality and character more important than looks...or money. What happen to kindness and acceptance. Most woman are holding out for the perfect person I guess and I am not perfect. They sure don't act like they want to get married. To find a husband, A woman needed to be willing to do whatever it takes.I can tell if a woman really want to be in a relationship with me or not....because her behavior shows it. A woman that is serious about you will tell you things that she is going to do or be or accomplish – and you will see her doing them, being them, accomplishing them. Step by step the serious she moves forward with you and your relationship. She may move slowly, but she moves forward and you can SEE it… you can FEEL it. Your trust and belief in her is important, and she does everything to prove to you that she means what she says. There are other woman who all only cares about is whether or not you meet her needs--for a place to stay, for sex, for a hot plate, as a rebound comfort, as a convenience. These are the ones I stay away from.

I hate being let down by people who I have invested so much trust in. I am sick of being left disappointed when the people I care most about aren’t here for me when I need them. I am sick and tired of every single failed relationship I endure. I always try my hardest to make things work, to be the best I can be and to be as supportive, loving, caring and understanding as possible only to be continually left feeling unwanted, unloved and uncared for. After each relationship fails, I’m left feeling used, and in the end I can only blame myself for having so much faith in people who are only in it for their own selfish reasons. I am sick of giving my all and laying my heart on the chopping board every time I think that maybe, just maybe, this woman will be the right woman for me. That she will treat me right, be honest, be there for me when I need her, show me that they care about me and give their all for me too. Why is that so hard to ask? Is it too much to ask for people to just stop playing games and pulling on my heartstrings and to just be true to themselves and to the people who they take interest in? I have been let down so many times in the past and each and every time I have been let down I feel like a piece of my heart is ripped from me. I feel like my heart is running on empty, that there’s just one little battered piece left remaining holding on for dear life, and I don’t want to risk losing it to anyone when I know that they will innevitably let me down, just like all the others have done

I was once walking alone on a wonderful beach in Morocco and felt like, God I wanna share this with someone but nobody was beside me…I was really sad and suddenly, from nowhere came to me a child (3 or 4 Yrs old maybe) She had escaped her playful parents and ran towards me with arms wide open. I carried her, she made me a kiss on the cheek and by a sign of her cute face, she made me put her down ! I smiled to her parents who smiled back and it was a magnificent moment engraved in my memory forever. I guess God was listening to me.

I’m often asked how I remain patient with God’s plan for my life when I’m still single.The truth is that there have been many moments when I’ve been tired of waiting My mom challenged me once. “You need to let go and trust God with this,” she said. I started tearing up. She was right. I asked, “How do you let go of something so important?” Relinquishing this to universe has been quite a process, but I don’t want anything for myself that God doesn’t want for me. Where are the joy and abundant life in settling for something that He doesn’t desire for my life? Releasing this was incredibly freeing. I still believe universe will grant me this desire, but I will trust God either way. Until you come to that place of abandonment, the grass always looks greener on the other side. If you can’t surrender something of such importance, the danger is that when it comes you will cling to it and suffocate it, and you may end up hurting the very thing you have longed for. I now feel that I will be able to go into marriage as a whole person. A better prayer than “God, when will You bring the special woman into my life?” is “God, I don’t know what You have in mind for my future . . . but I await whatever it is expectantly, knowing that You know me better than I even know myself.” I don’t want any less than what God has in mind. I want the best that He has in mind.Life as is love is all about acceptance and letting go. Embrace where you are at at this very moment for resistance is giving permission to opposition. Being where you are allows to see all of your options.

Most people like met for coffee or something. it’s a lot of time and effort for what may–in the short term–be very little reward. I decided that I am not going to do that anymore. I will only met if it end in marriage and kids. When I think about my future and who I’d want to have by my side for the rest of my life, I like to think about the forever part. Can I stare at her face forever? Do I want to go out to eat with her…forever? Do I want her to touch me and vice versa…forever? Forever is a long time and seems to be a good measurement of how much I really like someone. I’m picturing Mary Poppins with her magical tape measure and when she measures herself, it says–Mary Poppins, wonderful in every way. My tape measure would say, Forever—you sure you want to stick with this one?

If falling in love is such a deep spiritual feeling of connection then you really don't have to see each other to falling in love,seeing that person physically to me just says that everything that you thought about them has been confirmed. Its the knowing already of your heart and the seeing them in person that you can't seemed to get enough of....before you fall in love with someone physically you have loved them within your heart for a while...you already know,there is a peaceful feeling of rightness about him/her. Its like your soul is at peace as if you have always belonged. Its that you have both went on different adventures,life experiences and now are getting back together...to love someone is to look at them and see yourself being reflected back to you,its two people sharing the same heart...they can never hurt you,cause hurting yourself is like hurting themselves.

Fallining in love to me means that a woman can speak to my heart and soul and take me into her heart and want to treasure me. She knows the worth and value of who I am as a person,she knows that I'm the most precious find she'll ever find here on earth that means something.

I can write to express my soul,words flow out of me because that is who I am. There is no searching for words for they are a continuation of what I'm thinking and feeling. I dont believe in that perfect person. I love them because they are imperfect and uniquely themselves for that is what makes them so interesting to me. You cannot love someone until they can love themself and that does not mean you love yourself in a selfish or greedy,needy way. There is a difference when you find someone who loves themselves fully,that is when you know that they can give their love out to everyone that they meet and that is how you know she is the right one for you because of her capability to care and love with those around her.

You know? I can go on and on talking with you about love and falling in love with someone just from reading your profile? That is what you should be already...In love with me. That is because my heart speaks to your in a deeper level then what most men want...I really want someone who can just fall in love with my soul and not that you just will say " Its like reading my perfect man come to life,damn it someone wrote him up! I want you to dont want to stop reading about me, to be consumes by about me with every thought, to wish for the book to never end...

Just saying...I think I am one in a million men....when I love,I love with everything that I am and who I am.

I'm not a time wasting man and I will know pretty much right away when I feel the deeper level of connection with someone. I've been burned a couple of times on this dating site of women not being who they say they are so I'm learning how to be more cautious. At the same time I'm not afraid to risk falling in love with someone.or risking my heart over and over again. It is a human experience as you have said,thank goodness that my heart just knows how to give love,so I forgive easily those that have hurt me and just keep what wonderful human experiences that I have learned to enhanced my own growth as a man.