JOURNAL: THIS OBSESSION WITH LOVE

We all, at some time or another, go through a period I like to call obsessing over nothing. The sentiment that often times resides deep within our psyches without the slightest knowledge and then out of nowhere goes into full gear.And to top it all off, it sits in the driver’s seat. It has the ability to control each and every thought, action, plan of attack in this little thing called life.

Because let’s face it, most of us hate the idea of walking through it alone.Here enters the obsession.The obsession over something that isn’t there, over blank space, over absolutely nothing.We work day in and day out for the perfect figure, the perfect career, the perfect friends…and most importantly, the perfect woman.In my experience, most of these men all too often are depressed, downtrodden and defeated.What is the common complaint? The lack of a girlfriend/ wife or even a prospective date that doesn’t urge them even further to the edge of insanity.They are in love with the idea of love. Deeply, heart-achingly in love. And it’s an unrequited love.

I hate to admit it, but I too have been the victim, the hopeless romantic, the fool.The guy who focuses on the fact that he is alone, that this is the end-all-be-all of happiness. And I don’t know the cure. Somehow, I’ve found that eventually I always wake from my funk, give myself a good hard look in the mirror and a little tough love. Sure, a woman would be nice, but relationships are messy enough—how can we let one that doesn’t even exist yet cause so much agony, so much frustration and so much pain?

We should channel that time and energy into something productive, something positive that might in the end lead us where it is that we want to be with someone we want to be with—a living, breathing woman with a whole bunch of problems of her own for us to worry about.

Love should be all-consuming. It should be passionate, always on your mind and one of the most impactful things in your life. But the lack of it? In my opinion, not worthy of this overwhelming power. I’d save that place of sadness for the real deal—trust me; at some point in the rush of love you may need it.