DATING/LOVE: IT SEEM TO ME THAT SOME WOMAN

It seems to me that some women, truly believe that they are open, seeking, and attempting to find a committed relationship, though really they aren’t. These women want to believe this of themselves, maybe, because it is easier to make ill-fated attempts to find a relationship than to actually be in a relationship. It’s easier to hang out online, than to tackle whatever issues that may be keeping them from participating in a committed relationship. In my mind the women I am meeting are either ready, willing, and able to love, or they’re not. Despite what I’m realizing about the women on this site, I am encouraged by my own responses and reactions, which are different from what they were when I first tried online dating before I got married and now divorced. This time around I do not feel so emotionally vulnerable to the process. I find that I am getting much less invested in the 100-word-profiles that I like. I feel much less troubled by acknowledged incompatibility between a match and me. Most importantly, though, I have noticed that this time around, I have shifted my focus with respect to women I want to date. Before, I was open to and willing to “work with” a woman as long as she was a  attractive. Happily, this time around my heart genuinely desires a woman who is kind and who shows this love by how she lives. This new confidence to be myself,  means I’m growing, right? And if I am becoming healthier and more real, and if I am less willing to get stuck pursuing less healthy or compatible men, then, maybe, hopefully, God-willing, I’m on my way!