PUSSY POWER: GOOD PUSSY AND GOOD DICK IS HARD TO FIND

Good pussy is subjective. What is good pussy to one man is mediocre to another. What will whip one man won't make another man break his stride. If you're in a room with a mixed crowd of men and women, the women with good pussy will be surrounded by men. Women with good pussy let it shine thru in every aspect of her life. She walks the good pussy walk.  She speaks with the confidence of a woman who has good pussy. She poses, eats and laughs the secret laugh of women with good pussy. I'm not talking about any regular old missionary loving pussy. I'm not talking about hunch for 5 minutes and doesn't care if you cum poon. I'm talking about the poontang pie thats so sweet and juicy he can't get enough. The kind he goes to work thinking about coming home to. The kind that is odorless, moist and hugs your man meat with the perfect amount of pressure. The kind that makes it her mission to milk you dry and leave you paralyzed. She gets extra points for being a Scorpio.

Good pussy will make you call out of work so y'all can phuck your day away.

You surrender your biweekly paycheck to good pussy.

Good pussy commands loyal dick.

Good pussy will be your muse.

Good pussy wants to see your dreams come true.

You keep your dignity after being whipped by good pussy.

Good pussy makes you hate condoms.

Good pussy has been whore'd UP for the right man.

Good pussy will help you live longer.

Moving on. In a world where men will sleep with any woman willing to lay it low and spread 'em wide, how do you know if your pussy has WHIP appeal? Now we can start the lesson.

Virgins should just take notes. No shade.

Chicks get caught up thinking big numbers and repeat sexcapades translate to good snatch. Noooo silly girls. How can I put this delicately? Just because you've whored out to every Tom with a dick who will penetrate doesn't mean you have good pussy. We live in a world where women have bad pussy. There, I said it. Men enduring a drought will never tell you your pussy is bad. Thats not how the game is played. He will look beyond your loose and dry poon because all he wants is a nut. You can moan all you want honey, it won't make him call you back. I'm not here to teach you kids about HOW a woman gets yankin snatch. Bad pussy exists. Don't test me on this.

Being pussy whipped is nothing to be ashamed about. Read that out loud 10 times and tell every man you know. Single men secretly envy pussy whipped men. I made that up. Pussy whipped men try their damndest to hide being whipped. There are married men who won't admit they're whipped. Ain't that some shit?

A guy who gives his coat to a girl when its chilly is a nice guy. A guy who surrenders his man cave so his woman can turn it into an extra closet is pussy whipped.

How can you tell if a guy is pussywhipped?

1. She Demands Dick When She Wants It. This is not to be confused with convenient pussy. Indeed, it is the opposite. She calls the shots. If she decides she wants you to be at her house after work, she expects you to be there waiting with nary a follow up question asked. Make it nasty.

2. He Does Shit Because SHE Says So. Good pussy will have you breaking your rules just to keep her happy. Once you're pussy whipped you will find yourself quitting the things you love just to spend time with her. You're eating HER favorite snacks and eating at HER favorite restaurants. Before you know it you're sitting on her couch drinking martinis and letting her paint your nails (with clear polish cuz you're a grown ass man) while watching a Sex and the City marathon. Pussywhipped. She pushes your limits because she knows the power of her good pussy. She has you doing things so far out of your character that you KNOW your boys will clown you for letting a chick convince you to do it. It doesn't matter how big you smile, you're pussy whipped and it shows. Way to go breh!

3 He Checks In. Getting pussy is easy nowadays. I'll be the first one thousandth woman to admit it. Its amazing how easy some women have made it for men to smash. Their standards are so low all you have to do is smile at her and she drops the draws dawg. Rarely do women make a man work for the coochie anymore. Checking in is part of the "work for it" family. Its the first cousin to building trust. Think about it: You're checking in with her to make sure its ok to hang with YOUR friends. If you do so through a text message, you're only mildly whipped. If you, in fact, check-in via a phone call while in the presence of your single friends you are whipped beyond the point of return. Might as well keep your balls on the nightstand.

4. He Stays Home. If you have ever stayed home because you wanted to eat a good home-cooked, you're domestic pussy whipped. The same goes for if you've ever stayed home because you don't want to leave her alone. You're fed good and fucked right so now you don't "feel like" going anywhere. Just put your balls on the nightstand.

Before you go saying "I have never been whipped because none of those things apply to me" stfu for a second. I realize what one man does when he's whipped doesn't apply to another.  All BS aside, you can tell when a woman has her man whipped by how he treats her. He will deny it but all you have to do is watch him. He will go out of his way to keep her. If he loses her he will make a vow to get her back by any means. Ladies, if you find yourself with a pussywhipped man on your hands, embrace it. Take advantage of it for as long as you can. If you're smart you'll whip him all the way into a happy marriage. Allow him to cater to you. Watch and appreciate him but stay on your shit. Pussy whipping ability won't him stay after he has realized all you're good for is giving good pussy and he wants more than that. While a dickmatized woman will make an excuse to stay, a pussywhipped man may still leave if he decides your good pussy is not enough. Such is life.

 PART II GOOD DICK

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As comedian Rob Stapleton so eloquently put it, GOOD Dick can do stuff BAD Dick can't do. Read that again, fellas. Females get caught up tryna figure out if he's hung like a horse. Lookin at hands, feet and limb length tryna figure out whether he's "blessed." Silly girls. Length doesn't mean anything when he doesn't have girth. Size doesn't mean much when he knows how to stroke it. Next thing you know you're blinded by the penis wondering why you keep accepting less than you deserve so you can keep your good dick supply. Don't be confused kids, we're not talking about good sex. Good sex can make you climax. Good dick will fck your whole world up. 


 What is Good Dick?

Good dick can call you at 5am and you will answer like you were wide awake waiting on his phone call. 
Good dick can ask you to make a 3 course meal on a Tuesday afternoon.
Good dick will have you standing in line on Saturday @6am waiting for Yeezy's to drop.
Good dick will inspire you.
Good dick will have you going to work on a Monday morning to a job you hate speaking to every one of the people you don't like.
Good dick makes your life better.
Good dick will have you glowing.
Good dick will have you driving in a rain storm just to spend an hour with him.
Good dick will make you sex your Saturday away.
Good dick will have your boss wondering how you manage to perform well under incredible pressure.
We're not talking about regular ol good sex. We're not even talkin' about the unrivaled good dick and good brain COMBO. . .yet


How can you tell if a man has good dick before you have spread your legs for 'em?

1. He Knows He Has Good dick. A man with good dick knows with every inch of his dick that he's great at laying pipe. Its in the way he walks, talks, dresses, laughs and looks at you. Good dick swag oozes from his pores. He uses that shit as a weapon. Good dick will ask you to take a trip just to get it and not stutter. He will be surprised when you ask "So you want me to travel all the way to (insert city) JUST to see you?" Good dick is rare and he knows it.  Girls wanna keep good dick on tap even if its in another town. Good dick uses his gift to change your mind and will have you losing your train of thought. The only reason he tries half the things he tries is because he knows he has good dick.


2.He Understands his REAL Purpose. He knows he can have all those stale ass qualities women say they're looking for (smart, funny, can take care of her, degree'd up, single, no kids, etc), but he knows what women really need: Good Dick at home. He understands his responsibility. He needs to have her walls trembling. He needs to leave her legs shaking. He knows she won't complain if he tells her where to put her legs. He knows he needs to toss her around and pulvarize the poon. He knows he can get her to jump off the dresser. He's also careful about who he shares his gift of girth with because he's learned the lesson that with great dick comes with great responsibility. He's probably given the pipe to a chick who wasn't mentally stable. That never ends well.