LOVE: THE FAMILY MAN (MOVIE)

I'm an unashamed lover of movies as well as books, and I have a special place reserved in my heart for movies that feel that deal destiny and love. What if you had done this instead of that? Our lives turn on the decisions we make every day. Most of those decisions are probably largely inconsequential in the grand scheme of things. But then there are the big ones, the decisions that will shape your life, that will in effect determine who you are. What if you got a do-over on one of those big decisions? Or at least got a glimpse of what your life would have been had you zigged where once you zagged? Jack Campbell is about to get such a glimpse. The Family Man is one of my favorite movie of all time. Nicolas Cage plays Campbell and he's an extremely successful Wall Street executive, a driven career man who thinks of money first, last and always. He's got it all. The swanky Manhattan penthouse, the Ferrari, the supermodel types crawling into his bed. Suffice to say Jack is not a family man. Then one foggy Christmas Eve it's not Santa who comes to say something to Jack but Cash. Who is Cash? Well, we're never entirely sure. An angel of some sort perhaps? Anyhow Cash asks Jack what he needs in life. Jack answers that he has everything he needs. Wrong answer. The next morning, Christmas morning, Jack wakes up in New Jersey. With a wife, two kids, a dog and a job as a tire salesman.

Years earlier Jack had flown off to London for an internship which started him down the path to the gloriously wealthy life he now so thoroughly enjoyed. But by getting on that plane he had left his college sweetheart behind. He chose money, not love. Now all of a sudden he's living the life he would have had if he had gone for love all those many years ago. It's a life of dirty diapers, minivans and bowling. And it's a life Jack desperately wants to escape. But Cash isn't going to let him off the hook that easily. Jack has to learn something about life, about himself. Will he come to embrace his new life as the family man? And if he does, then what? Cash has told Jack this is just a glimpse. A glimpse is a fleeting, temporary thing

Sometimes what seems right at a certain moment years later seems to be the epitome of poor judgment. Often our thinking is clouded and we don't even know it. Hence, years later one might ask: "How could I have done such a thing?" You think you're doing the right thing and later discover that what you did was motivated by pure selfishness, but you did not know that at the time. A man and woman have a relationship, one decides to leave; two lives are changed forever. Like it or not, we are interdependent on each other. What party A does can affect the lives the parties B, C, D, E, etc. Life is a crap shoot; there's no saying how the dice will roll. It's like a roulette wheel that never stops spinning

I will say that the show stealer was the child who played the daughter. Whether it was just her age that allowed her to play it with such innocence, or she has the same acting potential as Haley Joel Osment; she was very convincing. She reminded me of the same innocence that Gabby Hoffman had when she was in "Uncle Buck". 'Nuff said, the movie was heartfelt but Cliche'd

I also have to say.I defy any man after seeing this movie to not want to live with Tea Leoni as Kate. I totally communicated with the love story. It is not about career choices, or life choices. It is about living with the person you love, and discover that the sacrifices, the things you planned, like becoming famous, going to Wall Street, and be rich, or powerful, are lifeless, void. The revelation comes with the singing of a love song during a birthday party. Everyone thinks it is corny, until you understand the meaning of it. That two people love each other, and have dedicated their lives to being together. As the French singer Julien Clerc said: "When you are cold, I am the only one who knows". Love is about that solitude of two people in their own universe. Some tough questions are asked, of course. Did you never regret your choice, honey? And the movie does a fantastic job answering those questions. And tall as a King of Men, is the man who walks quietly to his job as a tire salesman, when he knows he has EVERYTHING. So you think it is cruel to be sent to the suburbs after ruling Wall Street, but try to imagine what it is to be sent back to an empty apartment with a view, after sharing one last night with the woman you love, in the quiet peace of your home, with two kids (and a dog). Of course it is a movie, but try to imagine what it means, to run after someone you love, with a crazy story at hand, knowing it is your last chance to make it happen, 13 years later. Try to imagine what it would be like if he/she just turns away and goes (and that YOU KNOW what you are missing). Insane

I am looking for my Kate. I think I have it all, but I don't. If you are here now...I would say the same thing that Nicolas Cage said at the end of the movie: "We have a house in Jersey! We have two kids. Annie and Josh. Annie's not much of a violin player, but she tries real hard. She's a little precocious, but that's only because she says what's on her mind. And when she smiles...And Josh, has your eyes. He doesn't say much,but we know he's smart. He's always got his eyes open. You know,he's always watching us. Sometimes you can look at him and you just know...he's learning something new.It's like witnessing a miracle.The house is a mess,but it's ours.After     more payments,It's going to be ours. And you, you're a nonprofit lawyer.That' s right. You're completely nonprofit.But that doesn't seem to bother you. And we're in love. After 13 years of marriage,we're still unbelievably in love. You won't even let me touch you till I've said it.I sing to you.Not all the time, but definitely on special occasions.And we've... we've dealt with our share of surprises and made a lot of sacrifices, but we stayed together.You see,you're a better person than I am,and it made me a better person to be around you. I don't know. Maybe it was all just a dream. Maybe I went to bed one lonely night in December, and I imagined it all, but...I swear, nothing's ever felt more real. And if you get on that plane right now, I'll disappear forever. I know we could both go on with our lives, and we'd both be fine. But I've seen...what we could be like together. And I choose us.Please, Kate. One cup of coffee. You can always go to Paris. Just... please,not tonight."



Nicolas Cage plays a slick Wall Street powerbroker  who has it all: money, money, money, and power. Jack Campbell's lacking a family, but he doesn't see that as a bad thing. He's also driven, obsessed with improving the company he works for - he even schedules a "crisis meeting" on Christmas Day. This guy's got balls, all right. He's making loot hand over fist, and he's probably on his way to an ulcer or a heart attack before he hits fifty.

On Christmas Eve, he gets a phone message from an ex-girlfriend (Tea Leoni). Years earlier, the two of them had made a decision crucial to their lives - he went to England to intern with a prestigious bank, and she went to one of the finest law schools in the country. This facilitated their breakup, but since Jack's made out rather well in the interim, he pays the call little mind. Then that night, he stops by a convenience store to pick up some egg nog. An irate lottery player (the always reliable and watchable Don Cheadle) pulls a gun on the clerk behind the counter. Jack offers to buy the man's lottery ticket in an effort to calm the situation, and even attempts to rehabilitate the hoodlum. "Cmon," Jack tells him, "everyone needs something." "What do you need?" Cash asks him. Jack considers the point, then replies there's nothing he needs. "Ok," says Cash, "but just remember, you got yourself into this." Hmm.

The next morning, Jack wakes up in bed with the lovely, the delicious, the married-in-real-life-to-Tea Leoni. And he has two kids. And a dog. And whoa! This isn't Jack's life, is it? He doesn't like kids! And here they come, bouncing on the bed he shares with Kate. It's Christmas Day, after all. But Jack's in shock. He panics, grabs the keys to their minivan (Hey! Where's his Porsche?) and dashes off to the city. What's going on?

Seems Cash is some kinda sorta angel or something (it's never really explained), and he's offering Jack a "glimpse" of what his life would have been like if he had stuck with Kate back in the day. Now, those of us who are of a certain age do wonder from time to time what life would have been like if different decisions had been made. Jack's problem is that his wonderment is now his reality. And it's most certainly not the reality he's looking for! The Single Jack is a hedonist who recognizes only responsibilities to his job. The Married Jack pays more attention to his familial responsibilities.

So we have a general fish-out-of-water scenario. Jack knows he's Single Jack, and naturally he has neither knowledge nor memory of life as Married Jack. He doesn't know his friends, his in-laws, his co-workers (he works as a tire salesman!), nothing. He doesn't even know where he lives! Ah yes, mad hijinks ensue. It's like in that Jim Carrey movie The Truman Show - the audience is in on the joke, but the lead character has no idea. See Jack stumble over gettin' jiggy with his wife! See him mumble greetings to friends he doesn't know! See him stand with his mouth agape most of the time, trying in vain to absorb everything.

There is one memorable poignant and heartwarming scene I should mention. He forgets their wedding anniversary. The little girl suggests he take his wife for dinner into the city. They eat, and dance at a high class restaurant, he has planned a plush hotel room with champagne. She asks "What are you sure about?" He looks at this beautiful woman, she is stunning, "All this time I never stopped loving you". I am sure right now, there's nowhere else I would rather be than here with you". She whispers "That's all I wanted to hear" ... and he is of course out of the doghouse.