THOUGHTS: DINNER WHORES...DATE WHORE...

So in Z100 they were talking about dinner whore. They were relating to a article on the new york post that i post in my other blog:

MEET THE DINNER WHORES By MANDY STADTMILLER January 12, 2006 -- THEY'RE gorgeous. That's the first thing you notice. How could a man resist taking these ladies to dinner, even if he suspects they might be staying in the relationship - or simply, at the restaurant - more for the pricey martinis than the possibility of marital or bedded bliss? [Seriously! Men, like all people, love being used! How can they resist? I better keep my husband away!] Meet today's modern - sorry, Ms. Steinem - "dinner whore." Immortalized by frequent discussions on Craigslist, and most scientifically defined by urbandictionary.com, the frank term doesn't scare some of today's modern female daters. "The concept of dating has changed," says 26-year-old blond bombshell Brooke Parkhurst, who estimates over the course of her 200-plus dinner-whore encounters she has run up combined tabs of $30,000 in New York and beyond. "Women used to feel like something had to be given in exchange, whereas now I'm perfectly confident that my company is enough."


My opinion:

To go out with a man you are not attracted to or interested in in any way is sad. To go out with this man for free food and drinks at a nice restaurant is something you should be ashamed of. What an awful way to take advantage of someone and their paycheck- completely vomit inducing. Who cares if he wants to go out with you? Who cares if he's wealthy and wants to throw his money around? If you don't like him, don't go out with him, period.

Women: don't do this! It's disgusting, sad, and shallow. If are whoring yourself out to spend time with someone that you aren't interested in just so you can eat at Nobu you are pathetic. Wouldn't you rather eat somewhere shitty with someone you are genuinely interested in?

So much for feminism in the 21st century. Go, be an empty accessory at the coolest new restaurant in the city with a 50 year old man feeding you something infused with truffle oil. Smile and laugh while he orders another $80 bottle of wine. Just don't come crying to me because you feel hollow inside when you go home to your empty apartment. That's right, he doesn't care about your thoughts and feelings, he just wants someone pretty to sit with while he gets wasted. And if you don't feel hollow and empty when you go home its probably because you're just too shallow to notice.

Some women are dinner whores, they're not the norm, but they're out there as sure as the sky is blue. Whether you want to believe it or not is up to you. alot of women here were offended. Its no secret most women will try and get away with free everything as often as they can, whenever they can. Don't deny it, its true. Women want equality, lets go all the way. Equal everything including the check. To say that a woman's time is somehow more valuable than mine is ridiculous. if the woman's company was truly captivating and there was genuine chemistry, if she gave you exclusivity (and didn't answer the cellphone for some second-shift booty-call who is going to meet up with her after), and if she respected you enough to order reasonably (rather than the lobster and filet mignon dinner with three shots of Johnnie Walker Blue and a bottle of Cristal), then you always have the option of picking up both checks. However, if it quickly becomes clear that you're out with a dinner whore (who hooked up with you solely to try some expensive, trendy restaurant she wouldn't otherwise try), then you take your check and leave her with hers. It actually allows a guy to be a gentleman to a lady who truly deserves it, while reserving the right for a guy to teach a mooch a lesson. (And, ladies, while I'm sure that there are many wonderful women left out there, you have to concede that there are too many who would take undue advantage of a guy's chivalry just for a free meal). More often than not, I've ended up picking up both checks.

I'm not opposed to picking up the cost of the first date, but plenty of women do date solely to take what they can from guys. These women are not the majority nor the mainstream, but men encounter them often enough to be wary. The real issue here is that men want some sign of *reciprocal interest.* I'm happy to pay for dinners out if you offer to cook for me sometime, or suggest that we stay in and watch a DVD, or something like that. I'm also happy to pay for all the dates if, frankly, you're mauling me by the end of the night. Men only want to know they are not being played for the fool. There are many different ways to show that to him, and so long as you do, he'll be happy and keep coming back for more. As liberated as our society is, and as easily as the woman can be the bread-winner in a relationship, there is some truth to the stereotype that the man provides for the woman. Dating is not cheap. Even men who make very decent salaries can find themselves stretched if they're supporting the dates and everything else in life's expenses, too. It's not about the money, it's about receiving a nice gesture -- something guys appreciate as much as women.

Most men don't need the petty validation that being a Dinner Whore supposedly brings. Now we're wising up enough to not be victims of those vampires either. What they've ignored is that men will do without. They will seek satisfaction from escorts and machines rather than deal with them.

When the feminists blew the lid off of our traditional family structures they believed that they were freeing women to pursue their sexual impulses -- and they were
right. They neglected to consider, however, that by destroying the traditional family structures they were also freeing MEN from the system of obligation and
responsibility that it took our culture thousands of years to develop and refine.

And, left to our own devices, most men will seek out women that are:

*Young
*Attractive
*Without baggage (e.g. children from a previous relationship).

This tends to leave all of these "liberated" single mothers holding the bag; sure, this crowd can hope that they will find a sugar-daddy to help raise their children, but if you ask any single mother how her dating life is going, the odds are that you will get a grim and resigned frown when it comes to finding a commitment-minded male to help her raise her children.

As the woman ages she'll discover just how important point #1 is to most men; her options even for dating will begin to dry up and blow away).

You have to remember that back in the day a single mother COULD rightfully expect to find a mate to help her raise her kids, but (and here's the kicker) this was
only because the traditional male socialization method was still intact; when the femmies busted up the traditional feminine roles, they also broke the MALE
socialization model.

You ever wonder why you hear so many women (particularly single mothers) whine that they just can't seem to find a "good man" (e.g. a traditional one)? It's
because they have bought into the big lie of feminism and somehow thought that they could step outside the traditional childbearing dynamic (children = committed
marriage) and somehow still find men staying within the traditional circle.

Kinda foolish, eh?

What does this have to do with paying? Simple. Paying for everything USED to be something males did BEFORE woemn were 'liberated'. Now that women are 'liberated', now that they are so proud they are 'earning more than men', now THEY can do all the paying if THEY want to pique a man's interest. Else a man will leave her be, take HIS money somewhere he can get more value for the buck and develop relationships in other cultures

Cultures are different, and therefore the women act different. Go to a culture where women are taught to respect men and you will get women who are relationship material. Simple as that.

Ask yourself...ARE women today taught to respect men? If a woman doesn't respect a man or won't take the time to EDUCATE herself in HOW to respect a man, what makes her think she can get a man to commit to her? Alot of men are also raised to be fools for women. There are still too many men punked out to the extent that they still believe in ideas or gender roles from 40-50 years ago ON ONE SIDE (where women benefit). It's like they were raised to cut their own throats for women that couldn't care less about them. In any dating relationship, I tend to see the wise words of Danny Devito, as stated in one of his movies, "Money talks, Bullshit walks".

Most woman will say...It's crass to have to think about money when you're trying to connect with the potential love of your life, If you really like someone, then you want to make them happy. The cost of a few dinners and drinks is a small price to pay to find the love of your life. A guy who goes on a lot of dates will say that it adds up, but as a friend of mine has said, date smarter, not harder. If you only go on dates with women who you have had conversations with (or e-mails with if you've met on-line), you should be able to gauge some sense of mutual interest first. Or at least potential things in common. I know it isn't always easy,