POETRY: IF I MEMORIZE THE LINES OF HER FACE

Smiling and thinking of you-
profoundly
Feeling contented in the
cloisters of my mind
Thoughts of you-
remembering
Wanting you by my side
Then, we could be-
in each others deep embrace
of life, living
The loving way
Now-
feeling nervous, anxious
with you not here
Morning, dark and misty
A quiet mellow day
Sipping a thick dark expresso
Sweet, ever so sweet
and rich
I smile and think of you
In love
And the message comes
through:
"I would be surprisingly good for you."
Here in the mainstream of
existence
Surviving in the cauldron
of a stormy sea of life
Rejoicing in the heart
of an agony, of loving
I cry out for you!
Echoes in the great cathedrals
of coastal redwoods
"Yes, I love you very much."
I hope this is not a dream
Can this be reality?
In the hardness of
living's torments
When hurtful words are
often said
Will our love wither and
perish-
like an ephemeral rose
of passion?
Petals scattered on the
dusty brown earth floor
Or will our love come back
strengthened?
Strengthened by the deepness
of a profound loving
Deep, warm, in the colorful coral canyons
of a tropical ocean
Or will we cry out in the
hurricane of life's
agony?
Will it, will it
survive the
boiling turmoil
of such a stormy scene
in the endless waves,
pounding insults-
this main stream of
existence
Living and loving
In our deep embrace of life


2
As I stare out of my window into the night,
Thoughts of you linger in my mind
Wondering where you are
Wondering what you are doing
Wondering if you're thinking about me
Longing to be there
Beide you
Inside you- into your mind's inner thoughts
Exploring your dreams
Making them reality
Realizing that my dreams are you
And that yours are of me
Wishing to fly into your room
Like an angel of love
To stroke your hair
To touch your face
To lay beside you
To let you awaken, and find me there
Having you gaze into my eyes
And know that I"ll always be there
In dreams and in reality
To give you happiness
Because I love you


3

how familiar must she be
for me to forget i love her?

if i memorize the lines of her face,
or muss her hair,
or step on her toes,
will i begin to love him less
than how she comes to me,
threadbare and weatherbeaten,
in utter vulnerability?

would loving her less bring me home,
or is my home with that
tender moment of surrender
her eyes will never see...
the look i allow myself in darkness
or between shadows of changing light,
swept up in forevers
no one would ever make me admit
existed?

if i glow today, it's simply
because she looked my way.
such plainest of things
make way to my soul
with a childlike certainty
and not without the faintest wonder.
some things, i guess,
will just grow old with me...
like religion, or gravity,
things turn into laws,
and become as wind,
as fire, as God...
how can there be so much beyondness
to this simplicity?

she comes to me
as a child comes in from the cold.
i will be here for her
for as long as my self-defenses steel me.
there is a sweetness to being needed
for the wrong reasons
and in spite of false dreams.
she just has no idea
how at night i creep
under covers alone,
burning in melancholy.



4

Light of all hearts, I feel you glowing inside
A field of emotions that reunites me with nature's cries.
If I could witness the world through your eyes
Would it show me a world I had long forgotten?

Spread your wings and fly right through.
I need every piece of comfort I thought I once knew.
Maybe I can break free at the same time.
Break free, break free...
Of all the animosity that cluttered me.

Their lies no longer matter, like a forgotten blood stain.
Everything about you shatters my brain.
You're everything I want to know, and yet I won't.
You keep me shy away from this world, so I don't.

Goddess... Under the sun
If I could witness the world through your eyes
Would it show me a world I had long forgotten?



5
Last night i stared at the moon
and thought of you,
I realised you were both the same
in some strange way, you see...

The moon is surrounded
by many stars,
and you are the
brightest star in my life...

The moon is far away
from earth,
and you are far away
from me...

But in the same way i can see
the moon so close,
you have this special way
of staying close to my heart...

The moon makes me
think of special things,
and you fill my dreams
with passion...

And even though
I don't get to see you often,
I can't explain the feeling
but when I look at the moon
I see you too.


6

Watch her blossom in the night
Her petals are slightly bent
Twisting and turning
Opening herself up to you
Oh the beauty on such a night
The mist from her dripping bud
Slowly falling to the ground
Such a wonderful sound
The fullness of her lips
Reaching out to you
Almost saying
Smell me
Touch me
Hold me
Enjoy me while I'm still alive,
Take me home with you tonight she cries
Something about a pretty flower
Makes one stop and ponder


7
Voices.
Softly singing,
like warm mist rising,
kissing tender foliage
with sweet morning dew.

I called your name
while you were yet
a dream waiting to be born,
from the earth wet with newness.

How could you have known
the countless light years,
fleeing centuries' moment
to hold your tender hand.

I AM, the thought you dreamed
burning within your soul.
Not from the substance
with rises and falls.

But, from love
which sees through death,
and love which awaits
your moist breath.

Within the silence of your heart,
my voice calls you, My Beloved.
To reach out beyond the stars,
and love me with all your heart.


8
As I stare out of my window into the night,
Thoughts of you linger in my mind
Wondering where you are
Wondering what you are doing
Wondering if you're thinking about me
Longing to be there
Beide you
Inside you- into your mind's inner thoughts
Exploring your dreams
Making them reality
Realizing that my dreams are you
And that yours are of me
Wishing to fly into your room
Like an angel of love
To stroke your hair
To touch your face
To lay beside you
To let you awaken, and find me there
Having you gaze into my eyes
And know that I"ll always be there
In dreams and in reality
To give you happiness
Because I love you


9

In my infinite mind....
 where it touches the sky,

Everywhere I look... I see... you there;
 With OUR LOVE, "Fathoms Deep"
 Reflecting back to me.

A Love beyond compare:
 A burning Ember stirring deep from within...
 With such Warmth, Compassion & Desire!!!

From the bottom of the ocean...
 To the Gods above...

I pray silently and reflect...
 You'd come back to me.

It's been such a lonely long time,
 My soul is hurting & craving you...

My heart is so... so... Breaking,
 From the Fathoms...
 The dark...
 & the deep.

Wherever you are...
 Wherever you maybe...

Could the good lord bring you back to me?

For eternity and all eyes to see
and bring our love back from the deep.

Into the bright sunshine,
Where it can show & breathe
With every heartbeat...

Be Consumed in fulfilling our souls
physically & emotionally
to the depths of our marrow.

This is what "your being" means to me....


10

While I was sleeping
I dreamed of you,
And only you.
I woke up with a thought of you
And couldn't wait to see you.
Now I'm with you, I'm feeling
What I always felt for you
My true passionate love,
For only You!



11
The Love I have for you
 is stronger than time.
The Love I have for you
 is greater than life.
The Love I have for you
 has no bounderies.
The Love I have for you
 could stand the test of time.
For all that is in this world,
 this Love surpasses it all.
Everything I have amounts to so little
 compared to this Love.
All the things that used to matter,
 matter no more, but this Love.
All that is in my heart
 is all that you have put in it.
To have a Love like this
 is like a story not yet finished.
For you to leave now looking for Love
 would take a lifetime.
Waiting to see you is like waiting
 to go down a hill on a rollercoaster.
Waiting to talk to you is like waiting
 to be able to breath.
To live my life without you would be like
 staying in a coma for all eternity.