FAN:

Why so many great people are single and can't find the right person, whereas in our parents' generation, people were married in their twenties and are celebrating silver or golden anniversaries. You mentioned that your parents have been married for 39 years and mine are married for 40! Perhaps it's not realistic to expect to "know" without a doubt that we are in the right relationship before we commit. Perhaps we need to just take a leap of faith? Perhaps our pervasive sexual attitudes where people have multiple sexual partners and jump into bed so readily is actually adding to our generation's problem of lack of commitment and can't find the right person to be with? I don't know and would be curious as to what you think of this. I mean, NOBODY in our parent's generation ever complained about men who can't commit because back then, you're not really supposed to have pre-marital sex. So guys can't wait to get married as soon as possible (in their 20s)! I don't know but maybe we're supposed to fall in love first and then become physically/sexually intimate? I know that you (and a lot of other men) feel that they can't fall in love with someone they haven't had sex with but if you look at the movies that you mentioned ie. The Lake House, Who's Got Mail, etc., didn't the couples fall for each other before they even meet?? They fell in love over letters and emails and getting to know each other before they met and certainly before they had sex!! Don't get me wrong, sex is great but it's way better to have sex with someone you love. Who knows - maybe our parents are really onto something. For their generation, marriage is sacred and you work on it through the good times and the bad, and it's a true partnership and friendship. I think our generation search for a myth and that's why they can't find it. By the way, in Europe, the older a woman, the sexier and more intriguing she becomes. And in our country, the 40-something Diane Lane, or the 40-year old Salma Hayek is far sexier than some 20+ year old bimbo like Jessica Simpson/Paris Hilton/Lindsay Lohan/fill in the blank 20 year old . Salma has even been quoted as saying that it has taken her so long to find someone is because most men are threatened by a beautiful, intelligent and accomplished woman.