THOUGHTS: SOMEWHERE IN MY DEEPEST DREAM THERE IS A PLACE FOR YOU AND ME *****

I need to be number one. This is where single mom comes in. I have been in a relationship with a single mom in the past. It was great in the beginning, she was very slutty, submissive, in fact there was one time where she gave me BJ in the same room while her son was watching TV. He didn't even know. The problem is that once he got older, the sex got less and I was down on her list...my need and wants weren't as important anymore as the need of the child.. In my opinion, the number one relationship is not you and your child, but you and your partner. Every child deserve a mother and father, personally, I think it is very selfish to get a divorse once you have kids. If there is NO family, there is no security, no sense of family, no sense of what a relationship is. What is best for any kid is to have a family that includes a mommy and daddy. Hence, if you want what is best for your children you should work on the primary relationship with your partner...because if that fail the family fail and everything else fail. ( Even Dr. Phil agrees with this) This mean if you decide to be in a relationship with me, my need comes first and then the child. I don't see anything wrong if a child see mommy and daddy in love, and if they catch mommy and daddy doing something by accident if you know what i mean. A child will see sex on TV, in the movies, in the internet, magazine, books and radio...yet it doesn't exist at home is totally crazy. Life is life. There is nothing wrong with making love.



 
 
 
Most people say they want a relationship, but they don't want to do the work that goes into it, for example return phone call, keeping promise or even taking turn paying for the date. Any flaky stuff will raise a red flag in my head. I have to tell you that I will call on your ambivalence and let you know that I don't have time to be put on hold. To me commitment is both a feeling and a behavior. The behavior is placing the relationship as top priority. I need to feel that the next women I am with is my partner, that we are on each other's side, that we are both invested in the romance and that we are both willing to take the steps to nurture this. There is nothing riskier in life than an intimate relationship. We must open our heart, be vulnerable, and take a giant leap of faith, that we trust each other not to do harm. It means that we both have a high degree of intention to continue together, even though we realistically don't know what the future will hold.

I learned that even if someone wants you, it doesn't mean that they are necessarily willing to invest in a committed relationship. I need that commitment for myself to serve as a sort of a safety net. Unconditional type of commitment is the only environment that will truly allow love to flourish. Commitment allow trust and intimacy to develop even during the times when the two of you may not be at your best. I need to know that she will be in it for the long haul and not just for the fun and games. I realize that love is really an investment of my time, energy, emotions, and money. Therefore, I have to be discerning about whom I choose to make that investment with. I'm not willing to make an emotional investment unless I have a pretty good sense that things could work out. I hear so many people telling themselves that they know how to love and to be loved, and that it's just that they need to find the right person to do that. But how many of these people are willing to work on their end of the bargain and deal with their fear of being vulnerable and being loving.

What I found out is that so many woman are slow to comprehend that in order to be loved, you must be a lover..and I don't mean in sentimental things although that is needed. What is really standing in the way is their fear of change. Wanting to believe that relationship should be easy and natural. It's human nature to want life without effort. When I tell woman that they must surrender their walls, their heart, their body they get angry. There is a part of them that would rather continue the life they have now...which is safe. When I tell them that I expect commitment from day one...the majority runaway. The reason why commitment scares them is that an agreement to commitment closes an important escape hatch,,,triggering fear of absorption. To make up for the emptiness of their life....they fill their life with substitute pleasures....like their career, active social life....all to reduce their feeling of despair, but what it really does is drain vital energy to really being in a relationship. As much as they say the want to be in a relationship, most woman keep attracting men who can't commit...and that is not my accident....because commitment require sacrfices and giving up on something...it require you to change and lose part of who you are which most woman aren't willing to do.



Is what we think of ourselves truly what we are??!!! Not always… So the only way you can really find out about me is by drawing your own conclusions… And that only comes with time, and that's what sucks about this online thing, it feels like we are all trying to sell ourselves. But there are a few things that nobody could deny about me: I am always smiling, I really value my friends and family, and I am very content with my life. As I go through my single life, I am learning the most of the time what people say they want and what they do to get it are totally different from what they really go for and how they go for it.

I don't think that this discrepancy is due to the fact that they are mischievous or in denial. I'd rather think that most people are still genuinely good and in search of happiness the best way they can. What I do think, however, is that the discrepancy between what they say and what they do, starts at an unconscious level (hormones play a greater role in these unconscious decisions than we give it credit for). And if it happens at an unconscious level, then well, how the hell do you fix that discrepancy? (This happened to me many times, I'd fall for the woman that has nothing of what I am looking for, and then as time passes the lack of the characteristics that I was looking for becomes more evident, thus creating tension. Therefore, eventually one of us would end the relationship).

I know I may sound like a bore, and as much as I would love to say that everything starts with attraction, and that chemistry plays the most significant role in a relationship, based on my experiences, I've learned that these things are only true at the beginning stages of a relationship. And the sad part is that most of us are incapable of thinking with our heads (not our hearts and sexual parts) in these early stages because, let's face it, it is all too new, exciting, fun and oh my God it feels good, not to think that way! So after a few disappointments I am trying to better myself by looking deeply into the correlation between what I say and what I do. Who I think my perfect match is and who I really go for. This experience is humbling, fascinating and frustrating all at once, because the deeper I dig the more I see that I don't even know myself all that well. And based on what I see happening in this single zoo out there, not to sound skeptical, but my bet is that most of you single woman out there haven't gotten a clue either.

But at least some of us are one step closer to finding our perfect match because we are trying to get in tune with who we really are first, so then we can identify someone that can complement our personalities; not for a moment, for the day, the weekend, or a season, but perhaps for a lifetime. I have a feeling that I may scare some "easy-going", "go with the flow" "looking for someone that feels great with "adventurous and spontaneous" "loves to travel" "down-to-earth" type of girl. But the truth is if you read this and could not at least become a bit interested in getting to know me better even if is just to enjoy sharing experiences with someone new, and having nice conversations, then, chances are, I'd have been wasting my time with you anyway.



I am speaker of love. I am speak of love between two humans. I am speak of releasing and abandoning ourselves to love. True love however goes beyond two bodies. True love spreads and expands into the very air. True love opens our eyes to the beauty of the world, a beauty that saturates everything, a beauty that has and will always be there. There is beauty in mud and mud puddles, in bugs and plants. It can even be found in a pile of trash abandoned on the street because each object was once held and created by someone; and a piece of them, a piece of their memory still lingers. Whatever it may look like now if you go back to the moment it was held you can recognize its beauty or the beauty of the person in whose hand it rested. True love from another person allows you to see the love of others, even strangers that was flooding in all along.

True love begins at the core and spreads outwards. True love begins first with recognizing your own beauty and then the beauty of others. True love is finding a way to express this beauty. True love is finding a way to help others express their beauty. True love is realizing that everyone at heart is beautiful, but so many have forgotten and become lost. In fear and anger they may hurt others because they do not feel loved and cannot recognize their own beauty. My dream of love is of holding many people up. Helping the old landlady beneath this floor find peace. Becoming a substitute grandchild for the child she never had. Proving to my mother that she is far more beautiful than she could ever imagine. Whatever they're missing will not be found down some alley by humiliating a man. Even they can be included within the beautific power of recognizing the beauty in others, if they only at first could recognize it within themselves. True love requires pulling even those who may harm you into the safety raft. Why? Because every life is precious, everything happens for a reason, every action can be redeemed. You may not see the purpose now but it will come later. Those you save may save others in the future.

This might sound religious but its not. This belief is not connected to any religion but instead is simply spiritual, connected to personal experience and the personal experiences of those I love. As I said earlier I am looking for someone to release myself into. I have been on a long journey to come to terms with who I am and along the way have found similar pieces of this being buried within others. The longer the journey the more people are discovered, the more wondrous it seems that they weren't recognizable all along. Now I am looking in your direction and have caught a glimpse of you. The gaze feels familiar but the face is still a blur. Now I am coming closer.

Ever placed your head upon a chest and listen, just listened, felt as if somehow you could reach down beneath their skin placed you hand upon the pulse of their heart and allowed your two beats, theirs and yours to meet? There are moments of silence. There are moments when there isn't a word you could say that I haven't thought, or a thought that I could voice that you haven't felt. And so we sit in these shared moments simply absorbing sound, unspoken vibrations wafting their way through the room until they reach me, until they reach you.

I come to you now, taking your hand, calling your name, beckoning your heart. I am whispering to you that all your dreams, all of your goals, all of your vision hinge on this.....the choice of love. I ask you to look carefully at your moments and what you choose. Why would you want to protect yourself from love? The belief that there is anything to fear from love is the lie. First you must recognize that as long you fear love, you have not experienced love, for love and fear cannot exist in the same place. Very few people have ever experienced love. I shall repeat. Because love and fear cannot exist in the same place, very few people have ever really experienced love. You have experienced only fear. You do not know love. Rather, you know messages of fear that contain a reference to love. These you mistake for the experience of love. This lie is handed to you since you were a child....be careful, love will hurt you....you can't trust him. We love you goes the message so we want to protect you. So rather be boldly into life with an open heart...you are taught to guard your heart.

Now I have come to open your precious heart. I have come to tell you that it is time to remember love. it is in love that you are created. Everything you are meant to have and experience through an open heart. So I now say to you that you cannot choose both fear and love. I say to you...give me one moment with your heart completely unguarded and I will show you love. If it seem I am repeating things, it is always because I need to. I want to show you this truth, again and again, until you understand it.

 
 
 
 
 
 
 


The best way I can describe about being submissive is something i wrote in my journal in one of my blog a long time ago: "I want to know you firstly as a person, someone with a mind, with thoughts, with opinions and with hopes. I want to be proud of you and your achievements, and I want to be warmed by your joy, your happiness and your passion. I want to share hopes and dreams, laughter and tears, light and darkness. At its root, I want our relationship to be fulfilling emotionally and intellectually. Without the ability to be open and honest at this level, we can never hope to be open and honest at a sexual level.

I want to know you secondly as a woman, with a woman's desires, a woman's passions, a woman's vulnerability, a woman's need to be held, sheltered and affirmed. I want to know you intimately; your curves, your sensitive places, your melting points, your tenderness. I want to know your love, your care, your affirmation of me. I am a Man, and I seek a special Woman to complete me, a woman who is brave enough to explore herself, and to be open and frank about her desires and needs. I cannot read minds, and neither can I guess at your inner passions.

I want to know you thirdly as a submissive to me. I want to know the pleasure of your willingness, your eagerness, your happiness in kneeling to me. I want to see the light of joy in your eyes as your place yourself before me, seeking my pleasure, and trusting me for yours. I want that submission to be not only in private, in the bedroom, but implicit every moment of every day. I want you to know that your service to me, your giving and openness to me, your desire to please me is the most precious gift I could ever have.

And I want to celebrate that submission physically. I want you to be open to me sexually at all times, even though days may pass before I avail myself of you – the fact that you are always keeping yourself ready and open to me will be a source of arousal for me. I want you to learn to accept, to cherish and to celebrate your sexuality. I want you to take pleasure in masturbating several times a day, though not to orgasm, just so you are always heightened in your own state of arousal. I want you to desire me constantly in every way that a woman could possibly desire a man.

I want you to desire to take me in your mouth, to make me hard, to submit your mouth and throat to my deepest and most penetrating thrusts. I want you to be grateful if I should deign to shed my cum in that place, and for you to eagerly drink it down and tell me how happy you are to do so. I want you to desire that so much that you will always wear red lipstick and makeup to enhance your attractiveness, and to indicate by your manner that you are always willing to serve me in that way.

I want you to desire to receive me in your cunt, to always be free of any clothing that might restrict my access there. My hands, my mouth, my cock, any toys that I may choose are always welcome there. Whether standing, kneeling or lying down. Whether on your front or your back,your cunt is my playground. You will keep it shaved and massage cream into the skin. When you masturbate, you will think of me using you. You will yearn not only for the sensations of sex, but also to submit to my controlling you. You will only cum when I give permission, and you will give that control to me in obedience and in recognition that your own pleasure will increase. .

I want you to desire me, to yearn with a deep ache to be stretched there by my hardness. As my submissive you will always open that hole to me and be grateful that I use that passage. And as my submissive, you will appreciate my desire, my longing, my need to be able to fuck your arse as a matter of course. You will never wear any clothing that hinders my access to you there, and at a word, a sign, a look, you will eagerly proffer that entrance to me. If you are able, you will pull your cheeks apart. If you are able, you will hold my cock against your puckered rosebud. If you are able, you will perform for me by using your fingers to stretch and distend that ring, opening your self to your master for his favourite act. Standing, kneeling or lying down, you will always be eager to welcome me in your bottom, and to groan with happiness if I should be pleased to shed my cum in your rectum.

And when you cum, whenever you feel that climax, whenever I gift you with the sweetness of sexual relief, I want you to call out my name, to thank me.

And at the end, I want you to be happy, to be fulfilled, to be grateful that I am your . I want to be your world, your joy, your own desire and focus. When all is over, and the toys are put away and the passion has cooled on our skin leaving traces of our cum and scent on each other's flesh, then I want again to see your smile, and to hear the pleasure in your voice, to know that there is nowhere else you would want to be but at in my arms."

A submissive wife is never ever abused in any way. She never has any violence used against her, she is never humiliated or embarrassed by her husband. A submissive wife is not owned by her husband, she in not his toy to do what ever he wants. She is his equal in every way.

There is only one reason a wife is submissive, and the is "because she chooses to be submissive". A husband can not make a wife become submissive. She entirely loves the life and benefits of a submissive woman.

For a woman that is submissive there are clear benefits to her in handing over control to her husband. So what does a submissive wife get in return for her submission? She gets a great deal.

A submissive wife makes her husband responsible for her well being. If he is going to make the decisions he is totally responsible for the outcome. A dominate husband soon learns that he must be very careful and be sure that his decisions truly benefit his wife. If his decision does not benefit her it is up to him to fix matters.

A submissive wife gains peace of mind because her marriage has a great deal of certainty in it. Her husband has told her precisely what is expected of her. She knows that she is doing the right thing all the times. She knows that he will be pleased with her and that all is well. This creates continuous harmony. If at anytime her behavior is not up to the set standard she is corrected then and there and it is the end of the matter. Problems never lay under the surface in a devoted relationship.

Her husband completely trusts her because her behavior is to a high standard at all times. From this trust a submissive wife gains freedom. A submissive wife does not work. Her husband must provide for her all that she needs to have a lifestyle that enables her to pursue her interests. Such interests must be approved by her husband and generally involve activities like tennis, piano lessons, educational courses and of course charity work. A submissive wife has the opportunity to be good on a number of levels.

A devoted relationship is very private. In public a submissive wife is very attentive of her husband. She stays at his side and behaves in quiet feminine way and with perfect manners. Looking from the outside no one can tell she is submissive and she is simply a much loved wife. A husband of a submissive wife is always proud of her because her behavior is perfect. Therefore he always wants her to be around him.

Most important of all she completely captivates her husband and he showers her with devotion. He will love and adore her. He will completely spoil her with his attention. A submissive wife is good person who lives a life of service and in return for her service she is showered with good. A submissive wife has an inner peace and from her serenity she gains a happy life.

To be a truly submissive woman you must live a life of devotion. Being a submissive is a spiritual journey of giving yourself to another without limit or compromise. A submissive has a life of service to those she submits to. Hers is a life of giving devotional love.

A submissive is by her very nature unassertive, quiet and sweet. It is very important that she indentifies with her inner little girl. Hers is a life of purity.

A submissive gives the ultimate gift, herself. She lets go of her life and lives a life of strict obedience. She does this completely selfless act out of her devotion. She gives herself completely with joy and good grace in her heart.

A submissive woman gains an inner wellbeing from knowing that she is good beyond measure. Her heart is light and free because she knows with any doubt that she is a good girl. Her obedience frees her.

There is no doubt in my mind that a submissive woman is a Goddess among women. She is a totally pure being who lives a life of selfless devotion and is given the world in return because she is worshiped by her Master.


What people don't understand and I have come to notice is that their current routine isn't generating the result they want. If you want something different you have to do something different and that is what I did. Now, this is the part that I will lose most of you. So my new approach is this....if you understand the concept of arrange marriage (where under 4% of arranged marriages end in divorced) then you will have no problem understanding my concept---"arrange relationship". An arrange relationship is a union between two people who want a relationship from day one. We would have to talk for a period of time to get to know each other. I will get a sense of who you are and if we are in the same page and figure out if we are compatibility.The basis rule of dating is talk long enough to see if it is worth meeting. I seek the meeting of the mind...harmony of the soul. The only way an arrange relationship that will lead to marriage work is through surrendering to that person.

Surrender means to love without limits. It means to relax your guard so your lover can feel your core--authentic, unhidden, and undefended. Your muscles relax. Your breath becomes full. Your body and heart willingly open to your lover. If you are hurt, then you are hurt, but in any case you practice to remain open and full, like the ocean. Surrender is the doorway to the deepest possible sex. Each purpose, each mission, is meant to be fully lived to the point where it becomes empty, boring, and useless. Then it should be discarded. This is a sign of growth, but you may mistake it for a sign of failure If you are with a man you don't trust, it is only because you prefer unsurrendered love to surrendering wide open in total trust. It feels safe. You are afraid to let go of control--part of you doesn't trust love's command--so you have chosen a man who doesn't demand your surrender with his depth of integrity.(this is an important sentence) If you did trust the command of love, you would only settle for a deep man capable of opening you more deeply than you could instruct him.

Surrendering is letting go into the void---into the mysterious, unnamed, mystical, formless future..into the arms that are invisible---that we become finally ready to receive it all. It's only when we allow ourselves to float in the great sea of life, giving up all control, trusting it will hold us up, that love will arrive. You must trust on the spiritual level that the forces of the universe will be on your side. Only by letting go will anyone appear. Love doesn't just happen....because in the background of every relationship is a story of intention and opportunity converged in time. There are always a whole set of circumstances, chance occurrences over which lovers have no control, which set love in motion. You go online and find me....or read my blog. Love is like a string of pearls, a series of experiences, which strung together one by one......become the exquisite whole with which you can adorn yourself. Every event or person leads to the next, and whole cannot exist without the parts. Love is a part of the elaborate, spiralling lineage of people and circumstances that constantly criss-cross our lives. The person who will step into your life to love you has been coming to you from just as far, through just as many terrible and wonderful experiences as you have. When the moment of our convergence arrives, it many seem like I came out of nowhere, but in fact I came to you from everywhere and you came to me through everything.

When we surrender, we relinquish inappropriate control and override the fear underneath so we can have the thing we crave the most—intimacy. Most people manage their fear by staying in control. They tried to control who approached them. They tried to control how their dates behaved. They tried to prevent heartbreak by looking for and finding some insurmountable obstacle to compatibility with perfectly good people. They even tried to deny that they wanted to be in relationships in the first place.

By definition, vulnerability makes you feel exposed, and therefore afraid. I understand this particularly well because I, too, was once terrified of vulnerability. My favorite antidote to it was control. I felt safer if I thought I could manipulate the outcome of every situation.

Women who try to protect themselves with control have suffered disappointments in the past. Maybe you've been through a tragic divorce or watched your parents split. Perhaps it was something less dramatic, but also painful, like having your first love break-up with you to go out with another girl. Such hurt prompts women to erroneously believe that we can prevent all future heartache if we manage everything properly.

Of course, it isn't so. First of all, the only thing you get from trying to manage the people around you is the guarantee that you will never find intimacy. Secondly, there are no guarantees against heartache. However, surrendering makes heartache much less likely.

Vulnerability makes us approachable and attractive because it's a gift to the person we're with. It's an unspoken compliment that says, “I trust you to be gentle when I put down my armor. I feel safe with you.” When someone gives me such a gift, my instinct is to be tender so as to reassure her that I understand the honor. Vulnerability will draw me to someone in a way that appearing invincible never could because I identify with the humanity and authenticity. To appear perfect is to keep your defenses up, which means others can't see and love the real you.

Once you have someone's empathy, there's only one way for them to interact with you: with compassion.

Women often protect themselves from disappointment and vulnerability by flaunting their independence. How many times have you thought, "I don't need anybody to take care of me” or “I can handle this?” Strength is attractive, but hard-nosed independence sends a “get away” message to those who want to approach you.

This masculine persona can be effective—and appropriate—in a work environment where forcefulness and toughness get the job done,but not in relationships.

But you have another side to you that's soft, tender, vulnerable and receptive. That part of you wants to be taken out for dinner, walked home, asked about, thought of, caressed, and just plain taken care of. It's the part of you that relishes feeling protected and cherished. These are undeniable feminine qualities. Since femininity is what men are fundamentally drawn to, those are the qualities that will attract a man who's right for you. Surrendering means acknowledging that as a woman, you have a feminine mind, body and spirit.

Taking a feminine approach to dating means that when you leave the workplace (or even when you're interacting on a social level in the workplace), you turn off your ambition and bossiness and relax into your feminine grace. You have the power to magnetize men with your manner, your scent, your body and your voice, which will serve you far better than a know-it-all attitude or toughness in the dating arena.

Revealing your feminine qualities allows a man to show his strengths, too. For instance, if you let him treat you, you give him the opportunity to demonstrate his generosity and ability to please you, which makes him feel proud and happy to be with you. If you dismiss his offers in the name of self-sufficiency, you reject him. If you try to one-up him or even the score, you're competing with him like one of the guys, instead of luxuriating in his adoration and affection. Now, he wonders why he should bother trying to do anything for you because he feels superfluous.

Pleasing a woman makes a man feel more masculine and good about himself. Men want to see your soft side so they can show their strength. By being feminine, we allow our man's masculinity to shine.

The word “surrender” is frightening to some because it calls to mind losing a battle or spinelessness. But in interpersonal relationships surrendering is simply acknowledging that sometimes the only thing I can change is my attitude, and that doing so has a profound effect on everything else. Making “surrender” your mantra is much shorter and to the point than saying to yourself, “stop trying to dictate who comes into your life and what he'll be like and when he will call.”

When a single woman surrenders she doesn't try to manipulate a man to express his feelings, devotion or commitment because she knows that would render his words meaningless. It creates the same kind of tension and frustration as when you twist someone's arm to do something rather than letting him decide when and how he wants to do it. She refrains from making ultimatums, nagging, criticizing, and correcting the man she is romantically involved with because she knows she can't improve someone else, and that trying will cost her intimacy.

Instead of indulging in negative thinking about men and dating, she knows that there are both pleasures and risks involved in discovering an intimate relationship.

Surrendering doesn't mean that I have stopped thinking for myself or given up my own ambitions. Most woman at work are aggressive, tough and bossy. But they must also recognize that those are not the ingredients for intimacy. I keep repeating this..because it is so true.

That level of absolute trust needs to develop. Surrendering all he may ask of you, including your money, your body, your home. Or even online, giving up so much that it is truly renders you helpless in your slavery to him. It's easy to be owned if you aren't risking giving up everything. But introduce children into your surrender, or your car and other possessions, the right to steer your career the way you wish... and suddenly, trust isn't that easy to give. Even surrendering your body is difficult.

A man who recognizes the value of trust, and what exactly you are surrendering to him, will understand that. It is necessary to let him know who you really are, and finding out who he really is, so that you know the man you kneel before.

The most important things to do in the world are to get something to eat, something to drink, and somebody to love you. I am one link in the chain of your destiny. We each have a mental picture of how relationships should start out, and anything that falls short of that makes us nervous. As soon as we fell that anxiety, the urge to control kicks in. One of the way most woman try to contol their man is by telling them that they're hurt when they don't do things their way. Part of being intimate is letting go of your expectation and accepting that his ways isn't wrong or meant to hurt you. You can't program him like a robot, but you don't want a robot anyway. Because he's human, he might do something that disappoints you from time to time..As a single person we are in the habit of running everything in our life, and rightly so. Now that you're becoming part of a twosome, you may feel the temptation to try to run your partner life, too at least some of the time. I know it's difficult to refrain from making helpful suggestion when somebody's else actions are impacting you by making you late, leaving you to do more things. Of course, you would always want to express your feeling in any of those situations, but what you don't want to do is correct,criticize, belittle, or dismiss your partner in an effort to make them more efficient.

What I want in a relationship is total surrender, and that scary a lot of woman off. I want a submissive woman. Most woman assume that I am about submission/domination are totally mistaken. When you surrender....It mean to acknowledging that the only person you can ever change is yourself. Depending on where you work, most woman second nature for them is to take charge, call out order, and correct others. Competence is an attractive quality, but no one want to play the part of underlining while you orchestrate everything. You'll never get to be his partner by acting like the boss. You only will emasculate him. Part of connecting with someone else is admitting that you don't want to do everything yourself, don't have all the answers, and sometimes need help.

Since your happiness is a high priority to your partner that you're dating, they will weight your desires heavily in their decision making. As a man....It every important for man that the woman they are involve with is happy. It's doesn't meant that your every desire will be met, but it does mean that your partner will go out of his or her way to give you what they can.. The point is to recongnize that your partner will take your feeing into account, but only if they know what they are. You got to understand that if you tell your partner to take a nap before he or she eats, or diversify his portfolio...You're gone form being the girlfriend to being the boss. If you are showing him how to iron his shirt or warm him to eat less cholesterol, you're now trying to run his life. Since running two adult lives is too much for one person, attempting it puts you squarely on the road for disaster. What you thought was being helpful him become the kind of person you want him to be....what you are really doing is extinguishing the embers of intimacy. Your subtext of your comments is "You won't do it right less I tell you how" which is neither endearing nor kind. If you decide you simply must try to control him. You are actually deciding to forsake your intimacy. So instead of underhandedly criticizing his choices, remind yourself that he know what he is doing. Keep your suggestion to yourself is that telling hin he's doing something wrong is disrespectful, and disrepect is an enemy to intimacy. The point of being in a relationship is not so someone can prevent your mistakes by warning them, but to support each other though you're still learning. Instead of pointing out his faults, hold a mirror up to his strength.

The man in your life want to know that you will respect his decision, ideas, and taste even if you don't agree with them. That means that you would refrain from criticizing, dismissing, or demeaning him. You won't try to teach him anything, even if you think you know better, because it's a form of control. Instead, you trust that he is smart and capable. The person who's right for you won't need rescusing. Guys don't need a woman to look out for them. Infact, nobody likes to be nagged about being careful....You just reveal that you don't trust him. Pessimism, distrust, and badgering are form of control sure to wear out and dampen passion. This is the time to focus on trusting that he can take care of himself and respect him by honoring the decisions he makes for his life. No man is looking for a mother type...trust me. He gets tired of being treated like a little boy.

Human are fragile, and everybody need positive reinforcement,especially from the person they love the most. Appreciating a man won't make him feel superior or become an egomanic, but it will make him feel more secure in the relationship and in the world, which is a wonderful gift you can give him.

If you stop controlling, criticizing, resucing something happens. You maintain the intimacy and connection you felt when you discover your mutual attraction. That;s because he can continue to spend his energy trying to please you instead of defending himself against you, and you can continue to spend your energy practicing good self-care instead of trying to control him.


There's always some risk in committing to someone else, because you can't control whether they will keep their end of the bargain. If you find yourself wanting reassurance, try to bit your tongue. Keep your eyes and your heart open to their efforts, however subtle, to make you happy. Trust that they want to make you happy and will looks for ways to please you. When you're unhappy about something in a relationship, you may be tempted to instruct, criticize, or correct. Instead, turn inward and ask yourself what it is you're feeling and what you want. That's the important information you'll need to express yourself in a way that is effective, nonthreatening, and dignified.

We all feel vulnerable in a new relationship because we don't know where we stand. What we all want is that person to tell us that they like us, loves us, find us attractive, and want to be with us for the rest of their life. If you find yourself insecure, see if you can find comfort in their action instead of longing for the words.

You thinks and feels hopeless that there's “no one out there,” but really the terror of risking your heart keeps you from acknowledging that any person might be right. Your good intentions cover your fear, and keep you from having to muster up a critical ingredient for finding love: courage. Nobody wants to have her heart broken, so it's sensible to want to protect yourself.

Love is all about being vulnerable. In fact, vulnerability is the soul of love. You have to trust the universe and let go of fear. Even if you are with someone for years ...you never truly know them. Life isn't a fairytale. There's no one perfect match out there. There will always be someone out there who's a better match. That's what makes an arranged relationship so beautiful. We stick with the person we chose from the start and as time goes on, we get to know them better and better. This is what makes dating so different, so much the opposite of arranged relationship. It is a perpetual search for the perfect soul mate, one which is likely to raise more doubts than provide answers. "Is this my perfect match?" "Or is s/he out there somewhere waiting for me to dump this current prospect?" The minds of daters are clouded by this notion. The beauty of an arranged relationship is that the emphasis is on getting along, not evaluating one another on a scale of one to ten. It is a mature relationship from the outset.

Although most people cannot fathom surrendering or even marrying someone they do not love, it is incredibly interesting to note that arranged marriages is not something which is fought against in some countries. The truth, surprisingly, is the exact opposite, many of the youth in India prefer arranged marriages, as it gives them the time and the ability to enjoy their youth without the constant worry and struggle of relationships. Most people generally believe that one needs to have live-in relationship or a long courtship before they can get surrender or marry to know whether they are sexually as well as generally compatible or not.

I believe that an arranged relationship gives one "a lifetime to learn to love them", as opposed to the ideal of learning a person inside and out before entering into a relationship.. It is not based on feelings, but rather on commitment. We met without having feelings for the person...or chemistry that most people believe in. The relationship is based one commitment, not on feelings. As our relationship progresses, the feelings develop, but for most people their your decision to enter a relationship on feelings, but what happens when the feelings wane? You have nothing left to keep the relationship together if you get married according to feelings and then the feelings go away what do you do next...most people get divorse.

A relationship between two people is something that is presumed to be fostered and created throughout a lifetime of marriage. Whereas now..most people do not take the idea of marriage seriously until after they know a person for a number of years or feel like they know everything about the person. One way of looking at this difference is that after marriage you tend to accept your spouse's differences and habits more easily than when you have a choice. A relationship not bound by marriage is more easily broken for the smaller nuances in life. After marriage you tend to accept what you have rather than look for someone better as people often do while dating.

I'm looking for someone I can release myself to. Who will love every part of me, just as I will love every part of them. Some people would say this requires a great deal of trust, that what they're looking for is a trusting relationship. But trust is not required if you know the person sitting across from you would never purposefully hurt you, or you them. This no longer becomes an issue of trust but simply of allowing, letting things to be what they are. You allow yourself to love, knowing that you are loved. You place everything down. Worry and fear does not exist. You relax. It feels similar to letting out a long breath of air until your lungs are empty, hollow. It's the space between being conscious and unconscious. It's the space just before sleep.

So what are the prerequisites? First and foremost you must feel yourself worthy of love. Truly no one can love you unless you love yourself, because you will never let them in. Whatever they say, whatever pronouncements they might make. Your heart will remain a closed door. Fear that they will find something unworthy within will keep it locked. Fear and distrust like a shield will hold them a hands breath away. They can love you from a distance. Struggle to get inside you. But what is the point if all their affection can only go skin deep? What is the point of a relationship if you never experience it at your core? Where is the fun and the joy? Loving yourself, trusting that even within your defaults there is beauty allows your door to open and other's to enter. This may still lead to pain and heartbreak. But what is pain compared to a life lived in fear?





Every person, animal, plant, and rock.....every physical thing....sends out energy like a transmitter. You are sending off energy---emitting energy---right now, from the center of your being in all directions. This energy....which is you.... moves outward in wave patterns, The energy leaves you, moves through the walls, the Internet, over mountains, past the moon, and into forever, It never stops. Your energy is pushing out, touching everything else. Everything and everyone else is touching you. Even this email is sending energy outward to you...are you ready to receive it.

At some point midway an interesting thing happens. At midway between you and me those energies meet. Our energies unite....it is the energy of 'US". This body of energy which our energy connected is the holy communion that we are drawn to. For we feel, along the pipeline, the sublime joy of the body between, of the joined union.

Even though you are there and I am here we can still feel it. We are both urgently drawn toward this experience. We want to move toward each other....at once.,,but then our mind sets in. The world has trained us to slow down, to mistrust the feeling, to guard against hurt, to hold back......but our soul want to know US now. If we are lucky, and we set our fear aside and trust that love is all there is we surrender to each other.

The energy that is "US" is already being experienced metaphysically, and you and I want to experience it physically. So we move closer together.....not to get to each other. It looks that way to the casual observer, but we know we are trying to get to "US" energy. We are trying to reach that place where we already know that we are one...and what it is like to be one.

So we move toward this feeling we are experiencing, and as the gap between us shorten, the energy that we are both senting to "US" travels a shorter distance and is thus more intense.

We move closer still. The shorter the distance, the greater the intensity. Now we stand just a few feet apart. Our body is glowing HOT. Vibration with terrific speed. The connection is thicker, wider, brighter, burning with the transfer of incredible energy.We are burning with desire and we are....and we move closer still.

The sensation is almost unbearable. Exquisite. At the point of our touch...all the energy that is "US" melt more. When we embrace and the gap close even closer...We will feel our "US" energy between us and we will want to get even closer to literally meld into each other. My body is ready to literally enter you and your body literally to receive me inside of you.

The tingling, the burning, is now beyond intense. IT is indescribable. Our two physical body join. We become one in flesh and still the energies flow between us....urgently, passionately. We move, we heave...we can't get enough of each other. can't get close enough together. We strive to get close .close Closer.

We explode....literally our entire body convulse. The vibration sent ripples to our fingertips. In the explosion of our oneness we know GOD...the essence of life. There is physical chemistries as well. We become one and a third entity is often is created of our physical form.

Thus..an out picturing of "US" is created. Flesh of our Flesh...Blood of our Blood. We have literally created life.

Now I am doing the same thing naturally and so the ether...the " air" between us is filled with energy. An intertwining, interwoven personal vibes that form a tapestry more complex than anyone can imagine. This weave is the combined energy field
 
 
 
 
 
Come with me now, into a forrest deep. I will not let go of your hand. There is waiting here, a grove of grass, a surprise that will make you laugh. You will feel there like a child again, and we will play among the wild. I will not be wh you see before, yet you will recognize my eyes. And when you do, I only hope that I will still be yours. I do not take for granted this, but wish with all my heart. Your light this day relieves my heart, your light that day will penetrate the darkness of my pain.

I will fly, if you will fly. We will fly as one. We will not regret the choice we made, to love each other now. For we both know the pain we knew, walking the corridors of a loveless world. We will hold each other up, We will free each other's soul to sing. The music of the universe will reconstruct our soul to sing. The music of the universe wil reconstruct our souls. The love we share will light the sky and dark shall be no more.

Allow your mind to gently embrace the image of your beloved. Now see, with your mind's eye, an angelic presence, a being of light stands. Allow yourself to slip into the luminous skin of this angelic force, to merge with tis light.

Pray that the doors to love be opened in your heart. Dear God, please make me a giver, not a taker. Dear God, please make this love a playground for our higher selves. Dear god, please make my beloved a very happy person. Dear God, please use me to restore her smile, to repair her heart, to promote the healing of my lover's like. And with our love and thought our love, dear Gdo, please heal the world.

 
 
 
 
 
PS:

The first law of love is You Are the Source of Love. You! Not your husband or your wife, not your lover, not your parents, not your guru, not your child, not your dog or cat, not anyone but you. Love is within each of us and radiates outward. If you really knew the truth of this law, your whole reality would change instantaneously.

All of the time and energy spent anxiously seeking love and approval from others would be immediately liberated for more creative pursuits. All of the misery generated by disappointment about not being loved by family, friends, or romantic partners would fade into oblivion. The struggle to find love and keep love would be transformed into the pleasure of lavishing love on others. The battle to avoid or deny the perceived emptiness inside would be over. The fear of not being loved and all the stories about not deserving love would dissolve, leaving peace and contentment in their wake.

Imagine for a moment that you know beyond a shadow of a doubt that your very nature is pure love. Imagine that you can make a choice at any moment simply to love, without any cause, without any target, without any conditions. Imagine this is known to you through your own direct experience, not as a theory, not as wishful thinking. The very idea may sound intolerably corny to you, but just for the moment, put aside any cynical thoughts you may be having and see if you can make contact with the love that you are.

A sacred text from India, The Changogya Upanishad puts it this way:

“As vast as this space without is the tiny space within your heart: heaven and earth are found in it, fire and air, sun and moon, lightening and the constellations, whatever belongs to you here below and all that doesn’t, all this is gathered in that tiny space within your heart.”

Do you feel the truth of this possibility that love resides in your own heart? Stop reading for a minute and see if you can experience this reality for yourself. What happens inside when you remind yourself that your whole being is nothing but love? What happens inside when you decide to love for no reason? If you’re not there yet, don’t worry. Years and years of brainwashing may take a little time and energy to undo.

When the infant’s caretakers do not embody the knowledge that they are their own source of love, but instead believe that love comes from outside, in the sphere of their influence, the baby soon forgets that his or her very essence is love. So many of us were not born into loving environments or were later surrounded by people who were disconnected from their own inner source, it’s not surprising we have difficulty realizing the source is not out there.

When a child is taught to seek love from others and to make herself conform to their desires in order to earn or keep this love, she learns to abandon her own intuitive knowing. Before long the child becomes desperate to find and keep loving contact with others. Just as we need food and water to survive, as infants our very survival depends upon receiving affection and nurturing touch.

If we do not receive a bare minimum of loving contact, in addition to food and shelter, the absence of tender touch can be life threatening. Health care professionals first observed this phenomenon in orphanages where babies failed to thrive even though their physical needs were being met.

When children become fearful of depending upon parents or caretakers who seem cold, distant, self-absorbed, or violent they naturally retreat to another realm. At the same time, in an effort to protect themselves from the pain of feeling unloved, they may develop protective habits and chronic muscular contractions that end up blocking awareness of the love inside.

Eventually these defensive maneuvers become so familiar it’s hard to imagine life without them. These defenses also function to keep the loving vibration of others from getting in. As adults, we no longer depend upon physical contact with others to meet our survival needs, though it’s still very pleasurable and health enhancing! Nevertheless, this habit of seeking love outside ourselves remains, along with the barriers to allowing ourselves to be loved by others. Sometimes we end up confusing love with sex and so our search for love becomes a never ending search for more and better sex.

The quest for love is doomed from the outset for those of us who were actively taught from an early age that love comes from outside. It doesn’t matter whether we believe the source of love is God-in-heaven, a romantic partner, Mom and Dad, or chocolate ice cream. If we think love is separate from who we are, we’re in trouble of one kind or another. You are probably better off believing that love comes from God than from Mom, Dad, or a romantic partner, unless your God tells you you’re a sinner who doesn’t deserve love. Chocolate ice cream will never judge you or reject you, but it is fattening! In the end, you’ll be much better off if you simply acknowledge that you are love!

The great mystery is the enormous resistance we have to shifting our attention from the outer world of people and objects to the source of love inside.

When life experiences cause you to lose touch with the love inside, you’re likely to develop protective habits and chronic muscular contractions that prevent you from feeling the love inside and that block the energy of love from penetrating your fearful being. They can also result in a wide variety of physical problems. Your chest caves in or puffs out, your shoulders hunch forward or your belly grows tight, your lips become stiff or turn downward, your chin juts out, your forehead wrinkles or your jaw clenches. Over time, these uncomfortable and unhealthy postures become second nature. They are called body armor. If you completely forget you assumed the body armor to avoid the pain of feeling unloved, you’re in big trouble because you’ve also forgotten that you can choose to release it.

Worse yet, you may take on responsibility for the absence of parental love. “I must be bad or wrong or they would love me. There is something defective in me. I am not enough.” Or maybe, “I am too much.” Again, these thoughts become unconscious background noise. You forget you are thinking them, but each time you do, they become a bigger barrier to love.

Meanwhile, these undermining thoughts and feelings become entwined with the body armor you’ve unconsciously created to avoid them. The body armor and the thoughts and feelings reinforce each other, keeping the pattern of feeling unloved firmly in place.

The strongest conditioning most of us get is to expect a romantic partner to be the ultimate source of love. Women in particular are led to believe that finding the right man delivers the keys to the kingdom of Love. Hundreds of love songs of the “I need your love, can’t live without you baby” variety constantly fill the airwaves. Put this together with the nature of sexual interactions that briefly bring to the surface your core self, leading you to mistake your own core of love for a gift that comes from the embodied lover beside you, and it’s no wonder that so many of us are confused.

I remember the first time I experienced the euphoric state commonly known as “falling in love.” I was twenty-four years old..with was Joanne and thought I’d been in love several times already, but one doesn’t know what one doesn’t know. I thought that the songs and poetry about this mysterious state of romantic love were fantasy or myth – something made up. It was only after several romances and one marriage that my previous tastes of this condition were revealed to be relatively superficial.

This overwhelming feeling crept up on me over a period of several days leaving me happy but dazed. The earth itself seemed alive and literally moved beneath my feet each time my beloved touched me. When I looked into his eyes I heard bells ring and my heart expanded so wide it felt as if it were cracking open. Everything I laid eyes on shimmered with a beauty so intense I could hardly bear it. I lost my appetite. Food seemed unnecessary when each breath I took nourished my soul. I felt a sense of peace, calm, and joy I had never known. Fear, a familiar companion, disappeared.

What I’d called love before, seemed bland and uninspiring in comparison. In retrospect I realized that my beloved ignited this experience of transcendent love in me at least in part because her own heart had been blown wide open. She later described to me a spiritual awakening several years before we met which had radically changed his self awareness. I now know that mystics throughout the ages have described their encounters with the Divine in language which echoes that of romantic and erotic love. At the time I only knew that something huge had happened to me and I thought it was all about her.

From the first time she touched me, gently stroking my bare arm in an attentive but undemanding way, I realized I’d stumbled on undiscovered territory. Up until then, I’d only been touched by people who wanted something. There were women who wanted to seduce me, or impress me, or marry me. They communicated their needs to be loved and appreciated as well as their insecurities and craving for reassurance through touch. I’m sure I was not alone in having rarely if ever experienced touch that was not agenda driven!

This new love transformed my sexuality. Sex had always been a spiritual experience for me, but I’d never known it could be like this. We flowed together effortlessly on many dimensions, becoming one being, but that was only the beginning. For without saying a word about it, she somehow communicated to me that she was worshipping the Divine and that I was he. At that time, the idea that I was a god was a completely new concept for me. Fortunately, this knowledge came in through my body, not my mind, and felt very, very good.

It totally bypassed the resistance I would certainly have had to mentally acknowledging what I now know to be true.

Instead, and quite predictably, my mind decided that I had found my soul mate and immediately began planning a future of blissful togetherness. But it was not to be. I was resident in a hopsital and her mom got cancer and she left to Boston. At the same time, my beloved’s absence propelled me into a lifelong search for the source of the love I’d first discovered through our encounter. For this I am eternally grateful. Had we stayed together it would have undoubtedly taken many more years for me to find the impetus to look within.

It’s totally human to long for love. Often this longing first appears as a tremendous desire to connect with a particular romantic partner. If this longing is fulfilled you may be content for a time and look no further. If you are frustrated in your efforts to attract, or keep, the affection of the man or woman of your dreams, you may be more motivated to investigate the source of this longing. Either way, you will eventually come face to face with this mystery. What is this longing for love? Why is it so powerful? Where does it come from? And how can it be satisfied?

Spiritual teachers from every tradition have always told us that you can only long for that which you already are. It appears that the love is in someone else, but this is only an illusion. Sooner or later, you will discover this for yourself. The love that you feel is inside, it can’t be felt any other way. If you didn’t already know love intimately, you would not long for it. You wouldn’t even suspect its existence. If you have never tasted chocolate, you do not crave it. Once you have sampled its delights, you want more. And once you’ve had fine chocolate, nothing less will satisfy you.

Somehow, most of us have forgotten that we are pure love and so we seek it outside ourselves. This longing is very useful in that it serves to activate your quest for love. Ultimately this search for the beloved leads you to the realization that you feel love when you are being loving, not when you are being loved by another.

I’m talking about finding the source of love inside of you. When you find the love within you, it will also manifest in loving relationships, You can’t fake it, and until you become your own source of love your neediness will repel instead of attract love into your life.

Treating yourself with kindness and compassion is certainly a positive step. Eating well, exercising, appreciating yourself, indulging in special treats and self-care rituals will definitely improve your well being. But doing these things is not the same as finding the source of love inside. Acting from a mental conviction that nurturing oneself is good for you is not equivalent to a heart-felt outpouring of self love.

When you believe that there is not enough love to go around and that you will not get the love you need, your body reacts with fear or anxiety as it would if you were in danger. You shrink into yourself in an effort to get away from this alien, unfriendly and threatening world. If a little love should happen to flow your way, you attempt to cling to it and defend your claim to it with ferocious zeal. Like a miser hoarding his stash of valuables, you are careful to keep others away from the treasure you depend upon for survival.

When you cultivate a sense of abundant love, drinking in the comfort and security of knowing you are held to the bosom of the Divine Mother, your body feels more expansive and open. You know there is plenty of love for everyone, so you can freely give it away. You have a sense of being at home and provided for where ever you find yourself so you become more outgoing and friendly. You want to share your sense of abundance with others who also feel this abundance. You have a choice. Which feels better to you? Which reality do you prefer?

The Course in Miracles defines sin as “lack of love.”[iii] When we look at the behaviors and attitudes which stem from a belief in the scarcity of love, this definition makes a lot of sense. Depression, anxiety, jealousy, envy, addiction, greed, and selfishness can all be seen to have their roots in the experience of not having enough love. Instead of viewing the sin of perceiving scarcity as an evil to be punished, the Course sees sin as a mistaken perception which can be changed by seeing more clearly that you have an endless supply of love in your very own heart.

The mistaken belief that love comes from someone or some place outside and the perception that inside there is only emptiness often leads to addiction. In order to avoid the disappointment of feeling unloved and the agonizing emptiness inside, many people turn to substances or activities which make them feel good temporarily, or at least dull their awareness of what they imagine they are lacking. Occasional use may be a pleasant distraction from suffering, but whether one turns to alcohol, drugs, work, drama, control, sex or relationships, if you depend on your chosen addiction to mask the feeling of being unloved, you deprive yourself of the motivation to find the source of love inside. Relying on a substance or activity to avoid the feeling of being unloved keeps you stuck. It’s virtually impossible to extricate yourself from a trap you don’t know that you’re in. It’s as if your pockets were filled with rocks. You wonder why each step that you take requires so much effort. You complain about how stuck you feel. Meanwhile these heavy rocks begin to wear holes in your pockets, but instead of letting the rocks fall out, you expend even more energy trying to keep the holes mended.

Perhaps the most common addiction of all is the addiction to approval. This addiction to approval is so prevalent in our society that it seems quite normal, but this is only because we’ve forgotten the Law of Source. When you believe that love comes from outside, and that in order to receive this love you must meet certain conditions, you are at risk for becoming addicted to approval. This need for approval keeps you in a childlike state of dependency.

It’s certainly pleasant to receive validation from your partner, just as a glass of wine with dinner can be pleasant. If you are able to skip the wine, or the approval, when it’s not available, you can choose to enjoy it when it’s offered. Otherwise you have no choice. You must have it. Like all addictions, the need for approval limits your freedom to act with total integrity. If you’re addicted to approval, you will sell your soul for it. You’re incapable of making a choice which might prove unpopular.

Much of the conflict in love relationships arises from one person attempting to control another. Individual differences are inevitable. People have different desires, different needs, different tastes, different opinions, different beliefs, different values, different priorities, and different points of view. Differences do not have to mean conflict. If you approach differences as valid and intriguing signifiers to be creatively blended or separately enjoyed and expressed, harmony can prevail.

What often happens instead is that we see differences as threats that may prevent access, or continued access, to our perceived source of love. We counter this danger by taking action to control the other. We may do it indirectly through manipulation, sulking, or threatening to withdraw our own love and support. We may do it directly by issuing orders, ultimatums, or polite requests which are really demands. Or we may keep ourselves separate and alone in an effort to avoid the whole issue.

Many people have an automatic unconscious resistance to demands. If you’re intent upon getting love from your partner, she will probably experience this as a demand. Without even being conscious of it, she may resist giving you what you want. Or she may give it grudgingly, resentful that he couldn’t give it freely because of your insistence.

Remember that the urge to control the other is a misguided attempt to get more love, or to control the imagined source of your love. Fortunately, this struggle is completely unnecessary. The love resides in your own heart. It is freely available to you at all times and does not depend upon controlling your partner







The first law of love is You Are the Source of Love. You! Not your husband or your wife, not your lover, not your parents, not your guru, not your child, not your dog or cat, not anyone but you. Love is within each of us and radiates outward. If you really knew the truth of this law, your whole reality would change instantaneously.

All of the time and energy spent anxiously seeking love and approval from others would be immediately liberated for more creative pursuits. All of the misery generated by disappointment about not being loved by family, friends, or romantic partners would fade into oblivion. The struggle to find love and keep love would be transformed into the pleasure of lavishing love on others. The battle to avoid or deny the perceived emptiness inside would be over. The fear of not being loved and all the stories about not deserving love would dissolve, leaving peace and contentment in their wake.

Imagine for a moment that you know beyond a shadow of a doubt that your very nature is pure love. Imagine that you can make a choice at any moment simply to love, without any cause, without any target, without any conditions. Imagine this is known to you through your own direct experience, not as a theory, not as wishful thinking. The very idea may sound intolerably corny to you, but just for the moment, put aside any cynical thoughts you may be having and see if you can make contact with the love that you are.

A sacred text from India, The Changogya Upanishad puts it this way:

“As vast as this space without is the tiny space within your heart: heaven and earth are found in it, fire and air, sun and moon, lightening and the constellations, whatever belongs to you here below and all that doesn’t, all this is gathered in that tiny space within your heart.”

Do you feel the truth of this possibility that love resides in your own heart? Stop reading for a minute and see if you can experience this reality for yourself. What happens inside when you remind yourself that your whole being is nothing but love? What happens inside when you decide to love for no reason? If you’re not there yet, don’t worry. Years and years of brainwashing may take a little time and energy to undo.

When the infant’s caretakers do not embody the knowledge that they are their own source of love, but instead believe that love comes from outside, in the sphere of their influence, the baby soon forgets that his or her very essence is love. So many of us were not born into loving environments or were later surrounded by people who were disconnected from their own inner source, it’s not surprising we have difficulty realizing the source is not out there.

When a child is taught to seek love from others and to make herself conform to their desires in order to earn or keep this love, she learns to abandon her own intuitive knowing. Before long the child becomes desperate to find and keep loving contact with others. Just as we need food and water to survive, as infants our very survival depends upon receiving affection and nurturing touch.

If we do not receive a bare minimum of loving contact, in addition to food and shelter, the absence of tender touch can be life threatening. Health care professionals first observed this phenomenon in orphanages where babies failed to thrive even though their physical needs were being met.

When children become fearful of depending upon parents or caretakers who seem cold, distant, self-absorbed, or violent they naturally retreat to another realm. At the same time, in an effort to protect themselves from the pain of feeling unloved, they may develop protective habits and chronic muscular contractions that end up blocking awareness of the love inside.

Eventually these defensive maneuvers become so familiar it’s hard to imagine life without them. These defenses also function to keep the loving vibration of others from getting in. As adults, we no longer depend upon physical contact with others to meet our survival needs, though it’s still very pleasurable and health enhancing! Nevertheless, this habit of seeking love outside ourselves remains, along with the barriers to allowing ourselves to be loved by others. Sometimes we end up confusing love with sex and so our search for love becomes a never ending search for more and better sex.

The quest for love is doomed from the outset for those of us who were actively taught from an early age that love comes from outside. It doesn’t matter whether we believe the source of love is God-in-heaven, a romantic partner, Mom and Dad, or chocolate ice cream. If we think love is separate from who we are, we’re in trouble of one kind or another. You are probably better off believing that love comes from God than from Mom, Dad, or a romantic partner, unless your God tells you you’re a sinner who doesn’t deserve love. Chocolate ice cream will never judge you or reject you, but it is fattening! In the end, you’ll be much better off if you simply acknowledge that you are love!

The great mystery is the enormous resistance we have to shifting our attention from the outer world of people and objects to the source of love inside.

When life experiences cause you to lose touch with the love inside, you’re likely to develop protective habits and chronic muscular contractions that prevent you from feeling the love inside and that block the energy of love from penetrating your fearful being. They can also result in a wide variety of physical problems. Your chest caves in or puffs out, your shoulders hunch forward or your belly grows tight, your lips become stiff or turn downward, your chin juts out, your forehead wrinkles or your jaw clenches. Over time, these uncomfortable and unhealthy postures become second nature. They are called body armor. If you completely forget you assumed the body armor to avoid the pain of feeling unloved, you’re in big trouble because you’ve also forgotten that you can choose to release it.

Worse yet, you may take on responsibility for the absence of parental love. “I must be bad or wrong or they would love me. There is something defective in me. I am not enough.” Or maybe, “I am too much.” Again, these thoughts become unconscious background noise. You forget you are thinking them, but each time you do, they become a bigger barrier to love.

Meanwhile, these undermining thoughts and feelings become entwined with the body armor you’ve unconsciously created to avoid them. The body armor and the thoughts and feelings reinforce each other, keeping the pattern of feeling unloved firmly in place.

The strongest conditioning most of us get is to expect a romantic partner to be the ultimate source of love. Women in particular are led to believe that finding the right man delivers the keys to the kingdom of Love. Hundreds of love songs of the “I need your love, can’t live without you baby” variety constantly fill the airwaves. Put this together with the nature of sexual interactions that briefly bring to the surface your core self, leading you to mistake your own core of love for a gift that comes from the embodied lover beside you, and it’s no wonder that so many of us are confused.

I remember the first time I experienced the euphoric state commonly known as “falling in love.” I was twenty-four years old..with was Joanne and thought I’d been in love several times already, but one doesn’t know what one doesn’t know. I thought that the songs and poetry about this mysterious state of romantic love were fantasy or myth – something made up. It was only after several romances and one marriage that my previous tastes of this condition were revealed to be relatively superficial.

This overwhelming feeling crept up on me over a period of several days leaving me happy but dazed. The earth itself seemed alive and literally moved beneath my feet each time my beloved touched me. When I looked into his eyes I heard bells ring and my heart expanded so wide it felt as if it were cracking open. Everything I laid eyes on shimmered with a beauty so intense I could hardly bear it. I lost my appetite. Food seemed unnecessary when each breath I took nourished my soul. I felt a sense of peace, calm, and joy I had never known. Fear, a familiar companion, disappeared.

What I’d called love before, seemed bland and uninspiring in comparison. In retrospect I realized that my beloved ignited this experience of transcendent love in me at least in part because her own heart had been blown wide open. She later described to me a spiritual awakening several years before we met which had radically changed his self awareness. I now know that mystics throughout the ages have described their encounters with the Divine in language which echoes that of romantic and erotic love. At the time I only knew that something huge had happened to me and I thought it was all about her.

From the first time she touched me, gently stroking my bare arm in an attentive but undemanding way, I realized I’d stumbled on undiscovered territory. Up until then, I’d only been touched by people who wanted something. There were women who wanted to seduce me, or impress me, or marry me. They communicated their needs to be loved and appreciated as well as their insecurities and craving for reassurance through touch. I’m sure I was not alone in having rarely if ever experienced touch that was not agenda driven!

This new love transformed my sexuality. Sex had always been a spiritual experience for me, but I’d never known it could be like this. We flowed together effortlessly on many dimensions, becoming one being, but that was only the beginning. For without saying a word about it, she somehow communicated to me that she was worshipping the Divine and that I was he. At that time, the idea that I was a god was a completely new concept for me. Fortunately, this knowledge came in through my body, not my mind, and felt very, very good.

It totally bypassed the resistance I would certainly have had to mentally acknowledging what I now know to be true.

Instead, and quite predictably, my mind decided that I had found my soul mate and immediately began planning a future of blissful togetherness. But it was not to be. I was resident in a hopsital and her mom got cancer and she left to Boston. At the same time, my beloved’s absence propelled me into a lifelong search for the source of the love I’d first discovered through our encounter. For this I am eternally grateful. Had we stayed together it would have undoubtedly taken many more years for me to find the impetus to look within.

It’s totally human to long for love. Often this longing first appears as a tremendous desire to connect with a particular romantic partner. If this longing is fulfilled you may be content for a time and look no further. If you are frustrated in your efforts to attract, or keep, the affection of the man or woman of your dreams, you may be more motivated to investigate the source of this longing. Either way, you will eventually come face to face with this mystery. What is this longing for love? Why is it so powerful? Where does it come from? And how can it be satisfied?

Spiritual teachers from every tradition have always told us that you can only long for that which you already are. It appears that the love is in someone else, but this is only an illusion. Sooner or later, you will discover this for yourself. The love that you feel is inside, it can’t be felt any other way. If you didn’t already know love intimately, you would not long for it. You wouldn’t even suspect its existence. If you have never tasted chocolate, you do not crave it. Once you have sampled its delights, you want more. And once you’ve had fine chocolate, nothing less will satisfy you.

Somehow, most of us have forgotten that we are pure love and so we seek it outside ourselves. This longing is very useful in that it serves to activate your quest for love. Ultimately this search for the beloved leads you to the realization that you feel love when you are being loving, not when you are being loved by another.

I’m talking about finding the source of love inside of you. When you find the love within you, it will also manifest in loving relationships, You can’t fake it, and until you become your own source of love your neediness will repel instead of attract love into your life.

Treating yourself with kindness and compassion is certainly a positive step. Eating well, exercising, appreciating yourself, indulging in special treats and self-care rituals will definitely improve your well being. But doing these things is not the same as finding the source of love inside. Acting from a mental conviction that nurturing oneself is good for you is not equivalent to a heart-felt outpouring of self love.

When you believe that there is not enough love to go around and that you will not get the love you need, your body reacts with fear or anxiety as it would if you were in danger. You shrink into yourself in an effort to get away from this alien, unfriendly and threatening world. If a little love should happen to flow your way, you attempt to cling to it and defend your claim to it with ferocious zeal. Like a miser hoarding his stash of valuables, you are careful to keep others away from the treasure you depend upon for survival.

When you cultivate a sense of abundant love, drinking in the comfort and security of knowing you are held to the bosom of the Divine Mother, your body feels more expansive and open. You know there is plenty of love for everyone, so you can freely give it away. You have a sense of being at home and provided for where ever you find yourself so you become more outgoing and friendly. You want to share your sense of abundance with others who also feel this abundance. You have a choice. Which feels better to you? Which reality do you prefer?

The Course in Miracles defines sin as “lack of love.”[iii] When we look at the behaviors and attitudes which stem from a belief in the scarcity of love, this definition makes a lot of sense. Depression, anxiety, jealousy, envy, addiction, greed, and selfishness can all be seen to have their roots in the experience of not having enough love. Instead of viewing the sin of perceiving scarcity as an evil to be punished, the Course sees sin as a mistaken perception which can be changed by seeing more clearly that you have an endless supply of love in your very own heart.

The mistaken belief that love comes from someone or some place outside and the perception that inside there is only emptiness often leads to addiction. In order to avoid the disappointment of feeling unloved and the agonizing emptiness inside, many people turn to substances or activities which make them feel good temporarily, or at least dull their awareness of what they imagine they are lacking. Occasional use may be a pleasant distraction from suffering, but whether one turns to alcohol, drugs, work, drama, control, sex or relationships, if you depend on your chosen addiction to mask the feeling of being unloved, you deprive yourself of the motivation to find the source of love inside. Relying on a substance or activity to avoid the feeling of being unloved keeps you stuck. It’s virtually impossible to extricate yourself from a trap you don’t know that you’re in. It’s as if your pockets were filled with rocks. You wonder why each step that you take requires so much effort. You complain about how stuck you feel. Meanwhile these heavy rocks begin to wear holes in your pockets, but instead of letting the rocks fall out, you expend even more energy trying to keep the holes mended.

Perhaps the most common addiction of all is the addiction to approval. This addiction to approval is so prevalent in our society that it seems quite normal, but this is only because we’ve forgotten the Law of Source. When you believe that love comes from outside, and that in order to receive this love you must meet certain conditions, you are at risk for becoming addicted to approval. This need for approval keeps you in a childlike state of dependency.

It’s certainly pleasant to receive validation from your partner, just as a glass of wine with dinner can be pleasant. If you are able to skip the wine, or the approval, when it’s not available, you can choose to enjoy it when it’s offered. Otherwise you have no choice. You must have it. Like all addictions, the need for approval limits your freedom to act with total integrity. If you’re addicted to approval, you will sell your soul for it. You’re incapable of making a choice which might prove unpopular.

Much of the conflict in love relationships arises from one person attempting to control another. Individual differences are inevitable. People have different desires, different needs, different tastes, different opinions, different beliefs, different values, different priorities, and different points of view. Differences do not have to mean conflict. If you approach differences as valid and intriguing signifiers to be creatively blended or separately enjoyed and expressed, harmony can prevail.

What often happens instead is that we see differences as threats that may prevent access, or continued access, to our perceived source of love. We counter this danger by taking action to control the other. We may do it indirectly through manipulation, sulking, or threatening to withdraw our own love and support. We may do it directly by issuing orders, ultimatums, or polite requests which are really demands. Or we may keep ourselves separate and alone in an effort to avoid the whole issue.

Many people have an automatic unconscious resistance to demands. If you’re intent upon getting love from your partner, she will probably experience this as a demand. Without even being conscious of it, she may resist giving you what you want. Or she may give it grudgingly, resentful that he couldn’t give it freely because of your insistence.

Remember that the urge to control the other is a misguided attempt to get more love, or to control the imagined source of your love. Fortunately, this struggle is completely unnecessary. The love resides in your own heart. It is freely available to you at all times and does not depend upon controlling your partner
 
 I am not a serial dater but I realized that what we all probably know in our heart, but fail to acknowledge is that there is no perfect person awaiting our arrival. Most people love checklist consist of physically attributes that doesn't go to the core of a person's character. The beautiful blond may have a terrible problem with anger. Most people choose who they will love long before they actually meet that person. A person can look like a movie star, but is she reliable and caring. The key question I ask myself is in the presence of this special person is do I like myself more? The smartest women knows that she always wants to be remembered for who she is, not how she looks, but most woman aren't smart.If you're like me , you might say you can't stand drama and that all you want is a nice, stable relationship with someone who loves and treats you well, but "nice" and "stable" have hardly the appeal of words like "exciting" or "passionate" or, well, "drama."   Alot of woman will met normal single guys with perfectly acceptable ZIP codes and ages and jobs and habits who never did a thing wrong (like myself) but for some reason these woman will chucked after the first date for being boring, predictable, too nice, too normal, not successful enough, or . . . admitted to no one, perhaps not even themselves. They had chances to finally settle down and have babies and live in a three-bedroom house with a two-car garage ..ect, but they don't because they are looking for chemistry. They want all the options, bigger and better and faster and shinier, or taller or sexier or stronger or smarter,...they  want the tippy-top of what they can get— "Rightly refusing to settle," is a bad choice. Somewhere along the way, "settling" became a dirty word in my opinion."Holding out for everything they want—is a delusional expectation. No one really gets to have it all. NO ONE! Everyone has to make choices. This isn't to say that if you want a successful career and to be a wife and a mom, you can't do it.  But inevitably, you'll have to give up one thing for something else. Why should you settle? Because that's what all humans do when they make choices. If you confessed to someone today that you'd married without "being in love," because you'd simply wanted to get married or have the financial foundation to start a family (or buy more shoes), or maybe because you just didn't want to spend Sundays alone anymore, they would look at you with a horror akin to what you might bestow upon a person admitting to murder. To me...love happens with time....with being with someone for a long period of time. It is about figuring out how to balance what you want and what you can get—in terms of love, marriage, and what each person has to offer—against all of the options, including the imminent biological reality of your decreasing fertility. It's figuring out if you care about your fertility at all, and if you care about it in light of being—or not being—married. Because at some point, it will simply be too late to have kids and most woman don't get that...they think they have all the time in the world.





My mom told me this story all the time: A girl asked a boy if she was pretty. He said no. Then she asked him he liked her and he said no. She asked him if he wanted to be with her forever. He said no. She then asked him if he would cry if she walked away. He again said no. She had heard too much. She needed to leave. As she walked away, he grabbed her arm and told her to stay. He said "You're not pretty, you're beautiful. I don't like you, I love you. I don't want to be with you forever, I need to be with you forever, and I wouldn't cry if you walked away, I would die.Once in a while, right in the middle of an ordinary life, love gives us a fairy tale.There are millions of people out there...but in the end... it all comes down to one.  You make a commitment, build a relationship, and then you realize, 'This is my soulmate'

But I also  realized that love isn't like the movies. Love is a temporary madness. It erupts like an earthquake and then subsides. And when it subsides you have to make a decision. You have to work out whether your roots have become so entwined together that it is inconceivable that you should ever part. Because this is what love is. Love is not breathlessness, it is not excitement, it is not the promulgation of promises of eternal passion. That is just being "in love" which any of us can convince ourselves we are. Love itself is what is left over when being in love has burned away, and this is both an art and a fortunate accident.

You want to know what happiness is? It's waking up in the middle of the night for no reason, shifting under the blankets and feeling the heat of the person next to you. You turn around and see them in their most peaceful, innocent, and vulnerable state. They breathe as though the weight of the world lays on anyone's shoulder but their own. You smile, kiss their face in the most gentle manner so as not to wake them. You turn back around and an involuntary grin forms on your own face. You feel an arm wrap around your waist, and you know it doesn't get any better than this. Isn't it weird how everyone else can look at the person you're in love with and find their every flaw, but to you nothing and no one could ever be more perfect?

Do you want me to tell you something really subversive? Love is everything it's cracked up to be. That's why people are so cynical about it... it really is worth fighting for, being brave for, risking everything for. And the trouble is, if you don’t risk anything, you risk even more. But so many of us are afraid of doing anything because we have been damaged.

I know you've been hurt before, I know many promises to you have been broken and I know you're tired from all of this just but let me be your resting place.... no hurt, no promises just plain you and me. You gotta take some chances, you gotta risk losing it all, you gotta close your eyes and leap because it might be worth the fall. I think that most woman are scared that they will want to love someone forever, and the other person will want them only for a few moments in their life. I been afraid to give a woman my all, I been afraid to love someone completely. What if behind her beautiful face and kind words she are just bribing me. Maybe she was just reeling me in until she turn around and drop me. I have fall so far that sometimes felt I was unable to recover, I wish I could see the ending sometimes. I would know if I should hold on to that person and keep going or just let it all end before I get up too high...but none of us have that option. Sometimes we go out of our way to make someone love us in return, but suddenly fate intervenes and says "oops, wrong person". This is so different you're so different, finally I've realized what I deserve and it's not what I had before

A soulmate is someone who has locks that fit our keys, and keys to fit our locks. When we feel safe enough to open the locks, our truest selves step out and we can be completely and honestly who we are; we can be loved for who we are and not for who we're pretending to be. Each unveils the best part of the other. No matter what else goes wrong around us, with that one person we're safe in our own paradise. Our soulmate is someone who shares our deepest longings, our sense of direction. When we're two balloons, and together our direction is up, chances are we've found the right person. Our soulmate is the one who makes life come to life.

And when a girl is quiet, millions of things are running in her mind. When a girl is not arguing, she is thinking deeply. When a girl looks at you with eyes full of questions, she is wondering how long you will be around. When a girl answers "I’m fine" after a few seconds, she is not at all fine. When a girl stares at you, she is wondering why you are lying. When a girl lays on your chest, she is wishing for you to be her's forever. When a girl calls you everyday, she is seeking for your attention. When a girl says "I love you", she means it. When a girl says that she can't live without you, she has made up her mind that you are her future. When a girl says "I miss you", no one in this world can miss you more than that

Let me know your faults and I will remind you of your strengths and gifts. I will not fall in  love with your beauty, I only admire it... In life, there are many things that we hope and dream for, love is but only one of them; through it seems that we spend all of our time looking for it, we probably keep walking right by every time...because the only things that life denies you are the things that you are willing to let pass by. To love someone is to see something no one else sees. Maybe you will see me through these words...but many of you won't.



The reason it hurts so much to separate is because our souls are connected. Maybe they always have been and will be. Maybe we've lived a thousand lives before this one and in each of them we've been forced apart for the same reasons. And I know I have spent every life before this one searching for you. Not someone like you, but you, for your soul and mine must always come together and if you don't respond to me we will  once again miss each other and the stars will have changed, but our live won't





My mom told me this story all the time: A girl asked a boy if she was pretty. He said no. Then she asked him he liked her and he said no. She asked him if he wanted to be with her forever. He said no. She then asked him if he would cry if she walked away. He again said no. She had heard too much. She needed to leave. As she walked away, he grabbed her arm and told her to stay. He said "You're not pretty, you're beautiful. I don't like you, I love you. I don't want to be with you forever, I need to be with you forever, and I wouldn't cry if you walked away, I would die.Once in a while, right in the middle of an ordinary life, love gives us a fairy tale.There are millions of people out there...but in the end... it all comes down to one. You make a commitment, build a relationship, and then you realize, 'This is my soulmate'

But I also realized that love isn't like the movies. Love is a temporary madness. It erupts like an earthquake and then subsides. And when it subsides you have to make a decision. You have to work out whether your roots have become so entwined together that it is inconceivable that you should ever part. Because this is what love is. Love is not breathlessness, it is not excitement, it is not the promulgation of promises of eternal passion. That is just being "in love" which any of us can convince ourselves we are. Love itself is what is left over when being in love has burned away, and this is both an art and a fortunate accident.

You want to know what happiness is? It's waking up in the middle of the night for no reason, shifting under the blankets and feeling the heat of the person next to you. You turn around and see them in their most peaceful, innocent, and vulnerable state. They breathe as though the weight of the world lays on anyone's shoulder but their own. You smile, kiss their face in the most gentle manner so as not to wake them. You turn back around and an involuntary grin forms on your own face. You feel an arm wrap around your waist, and you know it doesn't get any better than this. Isn't it weird how everyone else can look at the person you're in love with and find their every flaw, but to you nothing and no one could ever be more perfect?

Do you want me to tell you something really subversive? Love is everything it's cracked up to be. That's why people are so cynical about it... it really is worth fighting for, being brave for, risking everything for. And the trouble is, if you don’t risk anything, you risk even more. But so many of us are afraid of doing anything because we have been damaged.

I know you've been hurt before, I know many promises to you have been broken and I know you're tired from all of this just but let me be your resting place.... no hurt, no promises just plain you and me. You gotta take some chances, you gotta risk losing it all, you gotta close your eyes and leap because it might be worth the fall. I think that most woman are scared that they will want to love someone forever, and the other person will want them only for a few moments in their life. I been afraid to give a woman my all, I been afraid to love someone completely. What if behind her beautiful face and kind words she are just bribing me. Maybe she was just reeling me in until she turn around and drop me. I have fall so far that sometimes felt I was unable to recover, I wish I could see the ending sometimes. I would know if I should hold on to that person and keep going or just let it all end before I get up too high...but none of us have that option. Sometimes we go out of our way to make someone love us in return, but suddenly fate intervenes and says "oops, wrong person". This is so different you're so different, finally I've realized what I deserve and it's not what I had before












All our lives we search for someone to love,someone who makes us complete.We chose partners and change partners. We dance to a song of heartbreak and hope all the while wondering if somewhere and somehow there is someone searching for us. It seems right now that all I’ve ever done in my life is making my way here to you.

Say you’ll share with me one love, one lifetime. Lead me, save me from my solitude. Say you want me with you, here beside you. Anywhere you go, let me go, too. Love me, that’s all I ask of you. We all need a witness to our lives. There’s 6 billion people on the planet….. I mean, what does any one life mean? But in a marriage, you’re promising to care about everything. The good things, the bad things, the terrible things, the mundane things….. all of it, all the time, every day. You’re saying ‘Your life will not go unnoticed because I will notice it. Your life will not go unwitnessed because I will be your witness .If you see me walking with someone else It's not because I like her company It's because you're not brave enough to walk beside me

In every man’s heart there is a secret nerve that answers to the vibrations of beauty. The way to find out if you love someone or not, is by talking to them. The more you talk to them the more you either hate them or love them

And when you fall in love, it is a temporary madness. It erupts like an earthquake, and then it subsides. And when it subsides, you have to make a decision. You have to work out whether your roots are become so entwined together that it is inconceivable that you should ever part. Because this is what love is. Love is not breathlessness, it is not excitement, it is not the desire to mate every second of the day. It is not lying awake at night imagining that he is kissing every part of your body. I am telling you some truths. For that is just being in love; which any of us can convince ourselves we are. Love itself is what is left over, when being in love has burned away. Doesn't sound very exciting, does it? But it is! Sometimes you gotta learn to love what's good for you and not just because you have chemistry with that person.The only way to be happy is to love. Unless you love, your life will flash by

Did you ever buy a lottery ticket? I buy them sometimes, I mean not that I think I would ever win, but I like to hold it in my hand, and think: What if? That's why I am here.... I thought: What if? What if I walking down the street and I suddenly march right into somebody, and we just know immediately off of one look that we were meant for each other, and it like Barbara Streisand and Omar Sharif, but instead of singing about it we go off and make passionate love.

I know it's a cornball thing but love is passion, obsession, someone you can't live without. If you don't start with that, what are you going to end up with? I say fall head over heels. Find someone you love like crazy and who'll love you the same way back. And how do you find him? Forget your head and listen to your heart. Run the risk. If you get hurt, you'll come back. Because the truth is, there is no sense living your life without this. To make the journey and not fall deeply in love. Well, you haven't lived a life at all. You have to try. Because if you haven't tried, you haven't lived. Stay open. Who knows? Lightning could strike







The greatest insanity now is that people still think that the right love will come along. But people often find out that the right one slipped away, never did the right one ever come along. Sometimes when you hold out for everything, you walk away with nothing. It's funny how we set qualifications for the right person to love while at the back of our minds we know that the person we truly love will always be an exception.

In your life, you meet many people. Some you never think about again, some you wonder what happened to them. There are some that you wonder if they even think about you. And then there are some that you wish you never had to think about again but you do.

You spend all your time looking for love yet you feel nothing even when its staring you in the face I will love again but You will spend all your life knowing you turned your back on love and that makes you a hypocrite



 I have a question for you...Are we gonna cross each other's path, or just completely turn around? Will we just let go of what we had or go to the place where love is bound.There are some people who meet that somebody that they can never stop loving, no matter how hard they try. I wouldn't expect you to understand that, or even believe it, but trust me, there are some loves that don't go away. And maybe that makes them crazy, but we should all be lucky enough to end up with somebody who has a little of that insanity. Someone who never lets go. Someone who cherishes you forever, For a kiss to be really good, you want it to mean something. You want it to be with someone you can't get out of your head, so that when your lips finally touch you feel it everywhere. A kiss so hot and so deep you never want to come up for air. You can't cheat your first kiss. Trust me, you don't want to. Cause when you find that right person for a first kiss, it's everything
.




The real fraud is the mindset that has been ingrained in us since childhood: that people get the person of their dreams. Most don't



Forgive me because I have spent my whole life crafting this little list of how it's supposed to go when I meet somebody and as I've gotten older I've become more willing to make compromises. There's only one real prerequisite left on the list for the woman in my life... I have to love him.

You know how when you were a little kid and you believed in fairy tales, that fantasy of what your life would be, white dress, prince charming who would carry you away to a castle on a hill. You would lie in bed at night and close your eyes and you had complete and utter faith. Santa Claus, the Tooth Fairy, Prince Charming, they were so close you could taste them, but eventually you grow up, one day you open your eyes and the fairy tale disappears. Most people turn to the things and people they can trust. But the thing is its hard to let go of that fairy tale entirely cause almost everyone has that smallest bit of hope, of faith, that one day they will open their eyes and it will come true. I believe my soulmate is here.Love is an equation: a me and a you derives a we


We all think we’re going to be great and we feel a little bit robbed when our expectations aren’t met. But sometimes expectations sell us short. Sometimes the expected simply pales in comparison to the unexpected. You got to wonder why we cling to our expectations, because the expected is just what keeps us steady. Standing. Still, the expected’s just the beginning, the unexpected is what changes our live



There are millions of people in this world, but in the end it all comes down to one. I still panic sometimes, but I know that there’s something beautiful in my imperfections; the beauty that she  will hold up for me to see. The strength that I will never be able to say. In my opinion the best thing you can you do is find a person who loves you for exactly what you are. Good mood, bad mood, ugly, pretty, handsome, what have you, the right person will still think the sun shines out of your ass. That’s the kind of person that’s worth sticking with.




It's a wonderful thing, as time goes by, to be with someone who looks into your face, when you've gotten old, and still sees what you think you look like
You will never know love unless you surrender to it








 Love to me is someone telling me, I want to be with you for the rest of my life, and if you'd like me to, I'd jump out of a plane for you.






Sometimes, the only way to catch an uncatchable woman is to offer her a wedding ring .I always just hoped that, that I’d meet some nice friendly girl, like the look of her, hope the look of me didn’t make her physically sick, then pop the question and… um… settle down and be happy. It worked for my parents, for the best love is the kind that awakens the soul; that makes us reach for more, that plants the fire in our hearts and brings peace to our minds. That’s what I hope to give you forever.





At the end of the day, when it comes down to it, all we really want is to be close to somebody. So this thing, where we all keep our distance and pretend not to care about each other, is usually a load of bull





The wrong ones can’t hurt you. It’s the right ones




Sometimes it's easy to feel like you're the only one in the world who's struggling, who's frustrated, or unsatisfied, or barely getting by. But that feelings a lie. And if you just hold on, just find the courage to face it all for another day and someone, or something, will find you and make it all okay. Because we all need a little help sometimes. Someone to help us hear the music in our world. To remind us that it won't always be this way. That someone is out there, and that someone will find you




Have you ever looked at a picture and seen a stranger in the background. It makes you wonder, how many strangers have pictures of you? How many moments of other peoples lives have we been in? Were we a part of someones life when their dream came true? Or were we there when their dreams died. Did we keep trying to get in, as if we were somehow destined to be there. Or did the shot take us by surprise. Just think, you could be a big part of someone's life, and not even know it.




There are people that are beautiful and know they are pretty easy on the eyes …… and then there are those people that are truly beautiful the people that are beautiful from the day there born the the day they die. your one of thos people, one of thos people that are just truly beautiful.





My life is uncomplicated and secure, both emotionally and financially. I try to practice the gift of being aware and sensitive to others. I would love to share that sensitivity with the right woman. I'd like to find a lady who is serious about finding a partner in life, a woman who's compassionate, considerate, communicative, literate, and kind... someone who would enjoy sitting down for a good cup of coffee and a meaningful conversation. I don't drink, smoke, or take drugs, so if you're into partying, I'm definitely not your guy. But if you're looking for the kind of guy you'd look forward to introducing to your family and friends, I think you'd be pleased with me. You don't have to be a Barbie doll or anorexic, just have a beautiful soul. If you believe love knows no boundaries; if you believe life's challenges are opportunities; if you believe your heart is still young and you're willing to trust again over time, then we may achieve understanding. If you can see the colors of life; if you can forgive; if you can whisper sweetly and share incredible secrets, then we may be able to share. If you believe love attracts on many levels; if you're a child at heart; if you're kind to all children and can love them as your own, then we can touch, fingers-to-fingers. If you cry when you're hurt; if you laugh with pure joy and have an irreverant sense of humor; if you're willing to stand toe-to-toe with me and express your anger as well as your love, then we can be equals. If your idea of success exceeds wealth; if you're able to communicate without pride; if you're clean in body, mind, and soul; if you're all of these things, then we could grow together






Only once in your life, I truly believe, you find someone who can completely turn your world around. You tell them things that you’ve never shared with another soul and they absorb everything you say and actually want to hear more. You share hopes for the future, dreams that will never come true, goals that were never achieved and the many disappointments life has thrown at you. When something wonderful happens, you can’t wait to tell them about it, knowing they will share in your excitement. They are not embarrassed to cry with you when you are hurting or laugh with you when you make a fool of yourself. Never do they hurt your feelings or make you feel like you are not good enough, but rather they build you up and show you the things about yourself that make you special and even beautiful. There is never any pressure, jealousy or competition but only a quiet calmness when they are around. You can be yourself and not worry about what they will think of you because they love you for who you are. The things that seem insignificant to most people such as a note, song or walk become invaluable treasures kept safe in your heart to cherish forever. Memories of your childhood come back and are so clear and vivid it’s like being young again. Colours seem brighter and more brilliant. Laughter seems part of daily life where before it was infrequent or didn’t exist at all. A phone call or two during the day helps to get you through a long day’s work and always brings a smile to your face. In their presence, there’s no need for continuous conversation, but you find you’re quite content in just having them nearby. Things that never interested you before become fascinating because you know they are important to this person who is so special to you. You think of this person on every occasion and in everything you do. Simple things bring them to mind like a pale blue sky, gentle wind or even a storm cloud on the horizon. You open your heart knowing that there’s a chance it may be broken one day and in opening your heart, you experience a love and joy that you never dreamed possible. You find that being vulnerable is the only way to allow your heart to feel true pleasure that’s so real it scares you. You find strength in knowing you have a true friend and possibly a soul mate who will remain loyal to the end. Life seems completely different, exciting and worthwhile. Your only hope and security is in knowing that they are a part of your life.





I found myself lost in a desert, I began to walk, with every step I took, a flower grew and I looked up to the sky in search of a meaning, in search of an explanation and all I could see were your eyes so beautifully painted across the sky. I was just mesmerized of how stunning life could be when you are the sun and how free I felt with you being with me throughout my journey...Suddenly, I hear my heart beat faster and with every beat, I can feel the walls of my chest breaking down. My heart managed to escape from its eternal cage. I witnessed it transform into a white dove...breathless, I watched it fly away from me and disappear into the sky to be with you. I was happy but yet felt empty inside. As I continued my journey, I noticed that I was walking in a field covered with gorgeous never-seen flowers...I was speechless and drowned in your beauty. I began to walk faster and soon I had myself running in never ending circles but felt no loss, nothing at all...I wanted to find a way to get to you before the night and its caravan (stars&the moon) arrived. I felt hopeless and the thought of loosing you scared me...Finally, I surrendered to your love, I fell on my knees, I looked up to the sky and looked in your eyes, tears rolling down my face and all I could think of to say was: "I'm so tired of being without you"...



Have ... have any of you ... lost that one friend ... that person who you thought will ALWAYS be there. Who said they would always be there, but, then, they got tired of you, or fed up with you, or just stopped caring about you, and they just left? After promising you they would never leave they break that promise? You have other friends, people who are your best friends, but that person just meant something to you, something really special, and while those other best friends of yours are people who you would die for in a minute, and they are still there and you know they always will be, you just feel... empty because they take that specialness away because they just don't care anymore. They accuse their leaving of being your fault. They say it's because you stopped caring. Because you pushed them away farther than they could take. Because you just weren't good enough. Because you just didn't try hard enough. They say that if you cares, that if you didn't push them away, that if you were good enough, that if you tried harder, then they would still be there. But, what I don't understand is why they can't understand that the only reason I push someone away was because I loved them so much, and that they meant so much to me, and that I got scared. I was frightened that they would take that love away. And I was right. They did. Why can't they understand?





“In the space between yes and no, there’s a lifetime. It’s the difference between the path you walk and the one you leave behind; it’s the gap between who you thought you could be and who you really are; its the legroom for the lies you’ll tell yourself in the future.” ~Jodi Picoult


Only way you know someone loves you is by how much sacrifices they will put up to make you happy. Being unselfish, caring about you more then himself. It goes both ways though. If everyone thought of what would make their lover's happy instead of what makes them happy, they'll be a overflow of love. Love is sacrifices.



A person that truly loves you will never let you go, no matter how hard the situation is.

To have a good job, good car, house, etc has nothing to do with love


I get tired of being told that love is some beautiful thing and that to have it you have to be completely unselfish, but there isn't a single human being out there who is honestly selfless. Even those that do good things only do it because it makes them feel good or they think it's the “right thing” to do. I'm not perfect, but that doesn't mean I don't or can't fall in love. Love is one of the most messy ridiculous things I can imagine, despite that I'll still keep looking for it.
How can you honestly say you have never been so upset with your partner you didn't want them to touch you, go near you, or even have the audacity to speak to you in a certain tone, if you haven't you're a liar. Love takes you for all that you are, and all that you are not. Love is loving their cellulite because you want them to know you love EVERYTHING about them, even the things they wish they could change, the things they hate the most. Love has to see the storm of the anger to feel the calm afterwards, it's progression, it's love in the making. I love getting drunk with my partner and taking cabs home because we are best friends. We find comfort in each other, and find love in comfort.



Is love rational? If anything it's the most irrational concept known to man kind. We all seek it, hoping to find the perfect love to fall in love with but that seldom happens. It's work, it's happiness, it's heartache, growth, selflessness, confusion, compromising, and anything beyond and in between. Everyone experiences love in their own way.
Love is the most happiest thing in the world…yet it could be the worst thing. I always said I hate love…because when you have an argument with someone you love, it hurts more than anything. Or when you are far apart from the person….its heart breaking. LOve is amazing, yet very intimidating



“Love is unattractive. It can expose our worst traits: Jealousy, irrational fears, heated anger” and this belief has made (I'd go as far to say) the majority of people stay in relationships that hurt them. Like in “eat, pray, love” in the movie, at some point he says “lets just admit that we're in a fucked up relationship and if we accept it then we can be together forever…rather to be miserable together than apart” and it feels like love, that you'd be able to sacrifice your own happiness just to be near, but we've got to ask if that is LOVE in it's truest sense. Yes, I might be too ideal, and after being there and 'loving' wrong people I've come to believe that love is in it's essence, not those things. And you have touched on this saying that it's the bad kind of love. I'll go as far to say that that's not love at all and if we allow ourselves to believe that, then it keeps us there in that relationship for longer.

Have you never worry if that one you gave your heart to is caring for it properly.  you never get bothered when you see their eyes roam?  you never feel lost and alone when they’re not there?

All the bad things, all the good things.  All those parts of you you admire and hate. Love is that clinging to someone you don’t want to lose.  it’s being afraid when you fear you’ll never be near them again.  It’s being angry that they can see the parts of you you hate, and overjoyed when they can see the parts of you that are beautiful that you couldn’t see for yourself. All those things you hear about “love isn’t jealous”  ”love is perfect”  ”love is neverending”  ”love won’t hurt you”, it’s all false.  This is truly a definition of love.  not marriage.  not happily ever after. not constant agreement to the end of time.  

You want to know an example of love:  An elderly couple having dinner.  The man argues that there isn’t enough salt.  The wife replies that the doctor said salt is bad for him.  He calls her a nag.  She calls him an idiot.  They spend the next half hour arguing about it until they finally forget what they were fighting about.  She reminds him to put away his teeth before bed and he tells her that he was going to do it anyway.  They climb into bed with each other, and as they drift to sleep, they hold each other the way they have for the last 60 or so years.Love is going to be disagreement.  It’s going to be anger.  But more than anything, it’s going to be love in any way you can define it.  


Love is finding yourself feeling protective over someone else’s well-being. Love is being incensed with rage when someone or something has done your lover wrong.Love is your significant other telling you about their favorite album and then making a point to fall in love with it on your own. Love is wondering why your better half loves certain things. You think you can find remnants of them in their favorite films, books and songs, but you usually can’t.Love is getting drunk with your significant other at a party and taking a cab home with your bodies intertwined. You feel safest in these moments, the most secure.Love is still wanting to hold someone after you climax. After the initial euphoria from the orgasm wears off, you’re replaced with a sense of calm rather than a panic. You don’t want to search for your clothes, scramble to find your keys and figure out the best way to tell them, “See ya later forever!” You’re fine with chilling out in bed with the person and maybe ordering pad thai later.



Being in love takes away all of your pain,You have Nothing to lose and everything to gain. Happiness is there staring you in the face, Every time your loved one pleasures you with her grace. She puts you at ease whenever she is around, and every one of your worries gets buried deep in the ground. She gives you a sudden pang of self respect, and not a bit of sadness could you ever detect. She is your heaven while you're on this earth, She becomes the reason your mother gave birth. In her you find a lot of trust, and in a great relationship that's a definite must. Long heartwarming stares show you she does care, and finding another woman like her would surely be rare. You experience things with her  than you ever have before, and though you might not have everything you could never want more. She puts you on a natural high and being without her? NEVER! You would rather die. You'd miss how she held you and made you feel warm, for she is your rainbow with the calming of every wretched storm. I can't wait to find someone  to make me feel this way,

And when I do, I hope and pray..she'll be there for me with each passing day..Loving me as much as I love her, and the light our love shines will never go dim. I take my relationships now and allow myself to grow, and when the right one comes I will definitely know. I know in my heart she will come one of these days, and when she does I hope and pray that she will...forever stay.



When the darkness parted and the sun peered through upon the stormy waters of my soul,I scarcely would have guessed that you were the other half of my whole. My heart was blind and looking elsewhere for that perfect someone I thought I missed. Only you knew that my future lay with lips I had already kissed. You melted your way into my being,slowly, slowly... then all at once so fast.You overflowed my very heart with a love that's unsurpassed. Each day is now filled with so much joy,now that we are forever bound. I thank God each and every day for the diamond in the rough that I have found. And now the sun shines brightly down upon the now peaceful waters of my soul. I now know for certain, through and through, you are the other half that makes me whole.



What am I afraid of?

I guess the feeling that I am completely alone and that there was nobody to help me. In that moment, I felt all the other times in my life when I had been left alone and in pain. It felt like a knife was jabbing into an open wound on my chest. I could barely breathe, My sadness was so deep that it blinded me to any other realities. My biggest fear has surfaced. I believed that I would be stuck forever in the empty, painful feeling of my loneliness.


lexpro



In every girls life there will always be those three guys...the one she loves, the one she hates, and the one she cant get enough of...and in the end...they're all the same guy.

They say love hides in every corner, then I must be walking in circles. In the movie. A Beautiful Mind...John Nash said to his wife, ....It is only in the mysterious equations of love that any logic or reasons can be found.  I'm only here tonight because of you.  You are the reason I am.  You are all my reasons.Thank you.. That is the love i want.....the commitment i need.We take a risk when we open our hearts because the truth is, if we open our hearts, we will get hurt. You can't open your heart and not have some hurt because you're in a human experience. Even if it's the love of your life and you have many wonderful, deepening, growing, powerful years together, it's a human experience, and that person will pass over. Love takes courage..which so many people are afraid to do.To love at all is to be vulnerable.  Love anything and your heart will certainly be wrung and probably be broken.  If you want to make sure of keeping intact, you must give your heart to no one, not even an animal.  Wrap it carefully around with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglements; lock it up safely in the casket of your selfishness.  But in that casket -- safe, dark, motionless, airless--it will change.  It will not be broken; it will become impenetrable, irredeemable . . . The only place outside heaven where you can be perfectly safe from all the dangers of love, is hell.

Why is there this everlasting craving to be loved? I guess we want to be loved because we do not love; but the moment you love, it is finished, you are no longer inquiring whether or not somebody loves you. As long as you demand to be loved, there is no love in you; and if you feel no love, you are ugly, brutish, so why should you be loved? Without love you are a dead thing; and when the dead thing asks for love, it is still dead. Whereas, if your heart is full of love, then you never ask to be loved, you never put out your begging bowl for someone to fill it. It is only the empty who ask to be filled, and an empty heart can never be filled by running after gurus or seeking love in a hundred other ways.

Maybe true love is a decision. You know, a decision to take a chance with somebody. To give to somebody. Without worrying whether they’ll give anything back. Or if they’re gonna hurt you, or if they really are the one. Maybe love isn’t something that happens to you. Maybe it’s something you have to choose. You really don't know how much someone loves you. Love isn't a thing that just happens like in a fairy tale movie of "love at first sight." There has to be a common bond. A place in your heart and mind where you can go. Sometimes by yourself, and other times with each other. Because.... People in love will purposely hurt each other with spiteful words and actions. Hoping that the other will understand by forgiving and comforting. But.. that kind of unconditional love is very rare. Its too easy to give up and see if the grass is greener elsewhere.

I believe and feel if a man or woman loves you they wouldn't do anything to hurt you. And knowing we all are imperfect I feel that if a problem was acknowledged that that person would come together with unconditional love and work this out. They would appreciate you for your worth and help you when you are in the need of them. Love is not thinking to ones self " what is this going to do for me", but will say or think "what can I do to help this person I love". But when you get people who are always thinking about themselves all the time. That is not real true love. And a person must be worthy of love as well. Some don't know how to love and leave you bitter for the next person who you try to love.

For me, love is caring about the person, being there for them no matter what it costs you (physically, emotionally, etc.), and a willingness to endure all things necessary to keep that person in your life. So, do you love someone? It depends: Do you find yourself giving up other ventures just to spend an extra moment with them? Do you enjoy talking (really talking) with them? Does this person bring out a necessity in you to be the best you can be, not for your benefit, but for their benefit? How many people are willing to give themselves up?







All our lives we search for someone to love,someone who makes us complete.We chose partners and change partners. We dance to a song of heartbreak and hope all the while wondering if somewhere and  somehow there is someone searching for us. It seems right now that all  I’ve ever done in my life is making my way here to you.

Say you’ll share with me one love, one lifetime. Lead me, save me from my solitude. Say you want me with you, here beside you. Anywhere you go, let me go, too. Love me, that’s all I ask of you. We all need a witness to our lives. There’s 6 billion people on the planet….. I mean, what does any one life mean? But in a marriage, you’re promising to care about everything. The good things, the bad things, the terrible things, the mundane things….. all of it, all the time, every day. You’re saying ‘Your life will not go unnoticed because I will notice it. Your life will not go unwitnessed because I will be your witness .If you see me walking with someone else It's not because I like her company It's because you're not brave enough to walk beside me

In every man’s heart there is a secret nerve that answers to the vibrations of beauty. The way to find out if you love someone or not, is by talking to them. The more you talk to them the more you either hate them or love them

And when you fall in love, it is a temporary madness. It erupts like an earthquake, and then it subsides. And when it subsides, you have to make a decision. You have to work out whether your roots are become so entwined together that it is inconceivable that you should ever part.  Because this is what love is. Love is not breathlessness, it is not excitement, it is not the desire to mate every second of the day. It is not lying awake at night imagining that he is kissing every part of your body. I am telling you some truths. For that is just being in love; which any of us can convince ourselves we are. Love itself is what is left over, when being in love has burned away. Doesn't sound very exciting, does it? But it is! Sometimes you gotta learn to love what's good for you and not just because you have chemistry with that person.The only way to be happy is to love. Unless you love, your life will flash by

Did you ever buy a lottery ticket? I buy them sometimes, I mean not that I think I would ever win, but I like to hold it in my hand, and think: What if? That's why I am here.... I thought: What if? What if I walking down the street and I suddenly march right into somebody, and we just know immediately off of one look that we were meant for each other, and it like Barbara Streisand and Omar Sharif, but instead of singing about it we go off and make passionate love.

I know it's a cornball thing but love is passion, obsession, someone you  can't live without. If you don't start with that, what are you going to end up with? I say fall head over heels. Find someone you love like crazy and who'll love you the same way back. And how do you find him? Forget your head and listen to your heart. Run the risk. If you get hurt, you'll come back. Because the truth is, there is no sense living your life without this. To make the journey and not fall deeply in love. Well, you haven't lived a life at all. You have to try. Because if you haven't tried, you haven't lived. Stay open. Who knows? Lightning could strike


First Date
I want to be the one - I want to be the person that touches your heart and makes it skip a beat - I want to be that person whose arms make you just melt - I want to be the person that your destined to be with

What do I want? I need someone who can deal with me. I need a woman who will make me see things from a different point of view. I need a woman who will make me talk about the things that scare me. I need a woman who will make me open up to her, a woman who won't give up on me. I don't want to be number one. Being number one means there is a two and three. I want to be the only one I don't want to go on hundred dates to find the one. I don't want to go on anymore dates unless it leads to marriage and kids. I am too busy to go on chemistry dates....or to see if we connect. I don't believe in chemistry. I believe in commitment. IT SEEM EVERYONE HERE WANT TO HAVE EMAIL TAG...I am not looking to date for a year and see how it goes, or someone who is going to tell me after 3 months they are not sure about anything in life. I am not looking to play cell, or computer tag. You must be stable and educated with an agenda in life which includes to marriage and child.



There will be no more picture. Looks are for sex. Character is for love. Love does not consist of gazing at each other but looking outward in the same direction. I want someone in the same page as me. If you are the type who looks at the guy's appearance first rather than personality...then i am not the one for you. I am not ugly. I am a good looking guy. You see when you love someone, looks are not important at all. I know that a woman's beauty isn't just what she looks like on the outside because a very wise and wonderful woman I know said it best: 'I don't love you because you're perfect. You're perfect because I love you. I want to be perfect in someone's eyes. Since we are meeting online, I won't know what to expect before I made my way to meet you. I suppose I should consider myself lucky that when you opened your door, you are as beautiful on the outside as you are on the inside because, in all honesty, it will be already too late for me to change my mind. My heart would be in charge by then. And you will always know that when I placed the ring on your finger, it was for who you are is, not who you resembles like.




Dearest Love:My heart beats out a symphonic note made sweeter because it sings your name. Dearest Love: My eyes brim over
with sugar tears flowing merrily because they see your face. Dearest Love My lips quiver softly in urgent rapture, delighted because they feel your kiss. I was born with half a heart when I find you it will be whole I will give you my half and my soul and those will remain with you always. When I see her face I want to be in her arms, when her arms surround me I feel safe and warm, never wanting to leave them. When I catch her watching me when she thinks I am not looking my desire is to make her happy. The way you smile, the way you laugh,but that's not all, that's only half...The way you comfort me, the way you smile,...the way I want to be with you every mile...the sparkle in your shining eyes when I am not with you, my heart cries. The way you touch my face,...the way you hold me in a warm, affectionate embrace...you take my fears and wash them away. I want you to know that I am here to stay as long as the wind keeps blowing and the sun keeps shining, please don't leave me here heartbroken, don't leave me here crying. You might not love me the way I love you, but whatever the circumstances are, I will always love you. Never forget our love is not through,all because I love you.

The truth is: love to me is unknown. My heart has been broken so many times. I have forgotten the meaning of the word LOVE. Trying to find some meaning to what I feel ...but I come up with nothing. Nothing because that's how I feel Like there's nothing in my heart, nothing left to feel. But somehow, someway, every time I look at you, hear your voice, think about you, or even hear your name, I feel something in my heart. Is it LOVE?  I hope so because you're special to me. The matter is- that you are entering a place that to most people it might take many years to achieve, ...MY HEART. but you seem so far away from me. I have to wake up everyday and face reality. But reality really doesn't matter any more- because I have you. even if you are far away from me .I know in my heart, deep down inside, you're here with me. So, is this love or just foolishness? I have no idea- but it's what I'm feeling. So, I leave you with these thoughts in hopes you'l?ll answer back and help me figure out what I?m felling inside. 

It has been winter for so long in my heart...Years of feeling nothing-no change of seasons,only cold, grey days turning into cold, dark nights.For so long, my heart's mind saw only pain...ragged images of what could have been overpowered by sharper visions of what never was and what might never be. I don't know just what happened or even exactly when it began but slowly- ever so slowly the clouds went away and finally the sun shone brightly on my face and my heart sang !!! You need to know  that you are that sun...with all the little imperfections that all of us have ones that make us human and keep us humble. You couldn't have known it, but a long time ago I prayed...Prayed that God would send me someone like you and when he did my spirit soared.and my heart sang!!!


The touch, the feel of fingertips caressing one's skin ever so gently.The surge of energy passing through from one to the other, passion running through their veins. These are the signs of absolute desire. Desire for nothing else except looking into the eyes, into the soul
of the one who is yours, your most prized possesion, your most beloved. Never wanting to be apart, never wanting to let go.Always wanting to spend every waking moment in love. To keep experiencing this love, to have through eternity, this absolute desire.

Last night in my dreams. I imagined you and I dancing in the moonlight underneath a star filled sky.Your eyes seemed to glitter in the darkness of the night. Such a vision of beauty, in the moon's beaming light. We laughed and we smiled. We were floating on air in our own little world with no one else there.Our hearts filled with passion and so much romance that we fell in love in the midst of our dance.Then as the dream ended with a passionate kiss.It is you and that dance I will always miss. There are matters which occur in life
That should never be scrutinized. Our love for each other is such! to question such a perfect feeling...is to destroy its incredible beauty.
For an answer could never capture...the pure essence of something so spiritual! Love's a heavenly gift God gives us freely. I beheld your unspoken love from afar...and accepted it without question. Hearing your voice is to know you...a thousand years or more! My mind anticipates what you want to say before you even speak a word. I know your touch before you reach out to me. I feel your moods before you voice them! With us, there's no need for explanations Heavenly gifts should never be questioned It should always be freely given and received. but above all...cherished!

Somewhere in my deepest dreams. there is a place for you and me. A paradise beyond the clouds...It's the home of cupid where only the ones who have been struck are allowed.Between love and life there's nothing else to find love is the backbone of life life is the reason for love. Between love and hatred there's a fine thin line a little step across the land leads to a different world.Between love and joy there's no difference to find my joy from you I solely derive the greatest thing your love provides




    
Are you waiting for the right person to live happily ever after? I guarantee you’ll wait forever. Where is this right person? Well, there will never be the right person because of our ever-changing expectations. Remember, there is no right person. We BECOME the RIGHT person and every moment after that becomes the right moment and every relationship after that becomes the right relationship because happiness becomes apart of who we are....and that is what I am doing all my life...to become the right person.

There comes a time in your life, when you must walk away from all the drama and people who thrive on it. Surround yourself with people who make you laugh, forget the bad and focus on the good. Love the people who treat you right and love the ones who don’t…from a distance…allowing them to BE in their own way. Life is too short to be anything but happy. Falling down is a part of life; getting back up is living

I know your life is empty, and you hate to face this world alone, so you're searching for someone that can make you whole. Here I am ...my heart, my life, my soul....you have the key to them all. You but need to turn the key and allow me to surround you... with my warmth and love. I understand the impulse: the impulse to want to put out your hand and want someone to be there at the end of your reach... to want someone to be close to.... to want to kiss or touch. Sometimes I feel there is a hole inside of me, and emptyness that at times, seems to burn. I think that if you lifted my heart to your ears, you could hear the ocean. And the moon tonight, there's a circle around it, a sign of trouble not far behind. I have this dream of being whole, of not going to sleep each night wanting. But still, sometimes, when the wind is warm and the crickets sing, I dream of a love that even time will lie down and be still for. I just want someone to love me, I want to be seen. 

We all want to fall in love. Why? Because that experience makes us feel completely alive. Where every sense is heightened, every emotion is magnified, our everyday reality is shattered and we are flying into the heavens. It may only last a moment, and hour, an afternoon. But that doesn't diminish its value. Because we are left with memories that we treasure for the rest of our lives.  True love is when your heart and your minds are saying the same thing. Kindness in women, not their beauteous looks, Shall win my love.  You know what I want? I want to be someone's reason for waking up, someone's reason for going through another day. Just once, I want to be the one being wished for, I want a woman to say to herself, 'I'm so lucky to have him.' To put it simply, I want to be someone's everything.  What I want is to be needed. What I need is to be indispensable to somebody. Who I need is somebody that will eat up all my free time, my ego, my attention. Somebody addicted to me. A mutual addiction.  I just want someone to say to me, I'll always be there when you wake. I don't need to be wanted; I want to be needed I don't want to be number one. Being number one means there is a two and three. I want to be the only one. I don't wish to be everything to everyone, but I would like to be something to someone. Sometimes it feels like, no matter how much success I have, it's not gonna matter until I find the right girl. "I don't want to be 'sort of dating' someone. I don't want to be 'kinda hanging out' with someone. I don't want to spend a lot of energy suppressing all my feelings so I appear uninvolved. I want to be involved. I want to be sleeping with someone I know I'll see again because they've already demonstrated to me that they're trustworthy 





I believe that the heart of a poet is someone who can take a look at a plain glass of water and say a few words that make people think that it is the most marvelous thing in the world. They have the heart to be able to see past what is seen on the outside and have the depth and the ability to see what is hiding on the inside and can bring it out for everyone to see. They can transform a dark and stormy day into the most beautiful day one has ever been to or seen. And they can look into themselves and bring out
their feelings without saying how they feel. That is what I do when I write.


The beginning of love is at the end of resistance...sometimes what seems like surrender isn't surrender at all. It's about what's going on in our hearts. About seeing clearly the way life is and accepting it and being true to it, Love simply cannot spring up without that self-surrender to each other. If either withholds the self, love cannot exist. You know what's the most terrifying thing about admitting that you're in love? You're just naked. You put yourself in harm's way and you lay down all your defenses. No clothes, no weapons. Nowhere to hide, completely vulnerable. The only thing that makes it tolerable is to believe the other person loves you back and you can trust her not to hurt you .One of the characteristics of love relationships that flower is a relatively high degree of mutual self-disclosure -- a willingness to let our partner enter into the interior of our private world and a genuine interest in the private world of that partner. I notice that couples in love tend to show more of themselves to each other than to any other person

People are so afraid to surrender to love. Fear? What is there to fear in love? Love is the very reason we live. To fear love is to lose all sense of living, and if we cannot love, then why have we been put here? Fearing love is like being afraid of breathing. It's not something to be scared of. It's so natural that no one can resist.All our lives we search for someone to love. We chose partners, change partner. . . all the while wondering of there's someone, somewhere who might be searching for us

Sooner or later we begin to understand that love is more than verses on valentines and romance in the movies. We begin to know that love is here and now, real and true, the most important thing in our lives. For love is the creator of our favorite memories and the foundation of our fondest dreams. Love is a promise that is always kept, a fortune that can never be spent, a seed that can flourish in even the most unlikely of places. And this radiance that never fades, this mysterious and magical joy, is the greatest treasure of all -- one known only by those who love..Love does not form, or be found, or even happen. Love  is something you do. It's your choice to love someone, so love all who are kind to you, no matter who they are, for they, in their own way, already love you. It is difficult for some people to accept that love is a choice. This seems to run counter to the generally accepted theory of romantic love which expounds that love is inborn and as such requires no more than to accept it. This theory believes that love is a magical force which frees us from all suffering and solves every problem, that it is an end unto itself. To a limited extent, there may be some truths to each of these beliefs, but having the capacity to love is not the same as having the ability to love. Not alot of people know how to love .If you love someone, if it because of her eyes or lips her great looks it’s not love. If it’s because of her intelligence or insight about her life it’s not love, its admiration. If it’s because she cries every time you try to leave it’s not love, Love is when you don’t know why you are attracted to a person. Love has no reason and that reason is still unknown.Lust is when you love what you see. Love is when you lust for what's inside...

The majority of us lead quiet, unheralded lives as we pass through this world. There will most likely be no ticker-tape parades for us, no monuments created in our honor. But that does not lessen our possible impact, for there are scores of people waiting for someone just like us to come along; people who will appreciate our compassion, our unique talents. Someone who will live a happier life merely because we took the time to share what we had to give. Too often we underestimate the power of a touch, a smile, a kind word a listening ear, an honest compliment, or the smallest act of caring, all of which have a potential to turn a life around. It's overwhelming to consider the continuous opportunities there are to make our love felt..

I have a thought...the one God has meant for us is going to be the hardest to get, the hardest to keep, and the hardest to accept. Because through all that, love will grow stronger, bonds will become thicker, and the future will become more clear. Love wasn't made to be easy, otherwise, we wouldn't end up with the RIGHT person, we would end up with the first one who came along. By struggling, we single out the wrong ones and realize who really is the ONE. We should all be so lucky to have someone who will never let us go. The ultimate legacy is to leave behind someone who will love you forever


One day we were brought into the world, knowing love only as being what we had for our toys, family, and friends. Then, you meet someone who alters your conception of love, and you never know how you loved anything before because this kind of love is so much different. It is then that you know that you are *in* love.The entire sum of existence is the magic of being needed by just one person. The door to the human heart can only be opened from the inside. When I was in love in the past...that  love is best describe as a feeling that is held tightly within the heart. It begins small and then consumes the body, and pours out our skin flowing eternally to merge with its beloved waters. It is a mark of pride, that scars the body for all others to look upon. Eyes will speak of the burning and consuming cool warmth from head to toe. The shiver of a touch reversed by the warm burning touch of the skin. These feelings are impossible for one to gain, for it is only known in the eyes of the beholds of love...

It sucks when you constantly love the wrong person while the right person is dying to be loved by you.Everyone tells you you deserve better, but then no one is willing to give it to you. If someone would ask me who I want to be with? I would simply say, 'Someone who can understand that I'm not perfect".I've never fooled anyone. I've let people fool themselves. They didn't bother to find out who and what I was. Instead they would invent a character for me. I wouldn't argue with them. They were obviously loving somebody I wasn't. We are all a little weird and life's a little weird, and when we find someone whose weirdness is compatible with ours, we join up with them and fall in mutual weirdness and call it love because

.

When we're incomplete, we're always searching for somebody to complete us. When, after a few years or a few months of a relationship, we find that we're still unfulfilled, we blame our partners and take up with somebody more promising. This can go on and on--series polygamy--until we admit that while a partner can add sweet dimensions to our lives, we, each of us, are responsible for our own fulfillment. Nobody else can provide it for us, and to believe otherwise is to delude ourselves dangerously and to program for eventual failure every relationship we enter

Sometimes i wonder how can stealing a piece of bread be a crime when breaking a heart isn't?  One feeds a starving family and the other leaves you dead.  How serious of a crime is that? A heart is a fragile thing. That's why we protect them so vigorously, give them away so rarely, and why it means so much when we do. Some hearts are more fragile than others. Purer, somehow. Like crystal in a world of glass, even the way they shatter is beautiful. My dear soulmate you are my other half, without you, I'm the dance without the song. I'm the heart without the soul. Without you, I'm the words without the book, you mean so much to me! There aren't enough words to explain how much I care about you, and how much I need you in my life. 







Are you even coming?

I’m lost in a mess of my own singleness.Here’s the thing about being single; At first it’s the best feeling in the world. You can talk to who ever you want, do whatever you want, there isnt anyone to hold you down, you finally feel free. 

After awhile you get this wave of sadness, though. You start feeling this depth of lonliness. You start seeing all the cute couples, you start getting more and more intersted in people. People say that when you’re in a relationship; it’s not all that great, but after being single for long enough; anything has to be better then the touture of loneliness. I mean, im not an expert at relationships. I don’t know how to handle every fight we’re going to have, and i will never be a perfect person. But im willing to take chances, to risk it all and learn everything i need to know about you just so i can keep us together.I promise no one will tear us apart and I won’t give up on you. 

That’s what I want. My anchor. I don’t want to flit around adventurously with this and that. I want to have adventures with you. I just want you to prove to me that love is real. I can’t imagine it. I know a part of me deeply, deeply,deeply wants it, more so than I can face on a daily conscious basis - the kind of depth that comes out when I’m bitterly drunk, or the rain is pouring and I’m in my tiny, uncozy bedroom alone, or when my heart aches for a newness I don’t yet know or understand; an adventure, an expression, a restless lust for satisfaction - but I have absolutely. entirely. no idea what it feels like.

Will you really make me want to be a better person?

Will I be in utter disbelief that you exist? that you love me too? that it seems as though we were created for each other?

Will I finally know why there are movies and songs and poems and billions of lifted or broken hearts because of this weird phenomenon I feel so separate from?

I hope you exist, you just have to.  I know I may seem like I’m not interested in you but I have good reason to.  I’m scared if I act like my true self, you won’t be interested in me because I’m not at all like most guys.But it’s okay, that’s just who I am. I’m also trying to see if you’re going to put in the effort to know the true me.  Once you break through my exterior, I promise, I’m everything that you hopefully want. I will be the husband you deserve and you’ll be the wife I’ve always wanted.  No one will love you like I would, I promise.  When I fall for someone, I fall hard and they know it.  I always put in as much effort as I can into my relationships.  This one will not be different.  In fact, I’ll probably put so much effort that I get annoying to you.

I need you to teach me. teach me how to love, and be compassionate. I’ve ran away from love my whole life, and I need YOU to pull me back & say ‘where are you going? I love you, and want to hold you. Not only that, I want to be with you.’ I want you to tell me sweet things. You need to be the woman that’s there for me, and who tells me to come over, because you found some lame movie that’s so stupid it’s funny & you think I’d like it. I just need you to be everything I need, and everything I think i don’t want at the same time.

I been asking myself:

What's wrong with me? What's keeping me from connecting with the one? The problem for me is that no matter how much I needed to be with someone..no one wanted to be with me. After a lifetime of trying. I still wasn't able to get into a relationship that will last forever. I came to believe that the reason nobody wanted to keep me was that I just wasn't lovable enough. If I was special like other people, they wouldn't have pushed me away. I really believed I was missing something that would make people love me...that there was something wrong with me. I could never tell someone how insecure I feel....that I feel like a failure or a reject. They would see me as too needy and pathetic and run right out the door. But I decided to be open and honest..with my feeling.

In the past...I was the type who would go after the trophy girl. All I wanted was to prove that I was somebody.Anyone less would make me feel like I wasn't meeting my standard. All the chasing and pursuing and never the one being sought after. Everytime I was interested in someone, it was because they had what I wanted. They were always educated, or came from the same background, or had more charisma and more friends...or more something....more anything that I wanted but didn't have. I was trying to get it through them vicariously. The flip side of this was that when I was with someone like this, I would feel even more inadequate, always worrying whether I was good enough for them. So, I was choosing people who made me feel bad about myself. What a waste of time. After having relationship failed too many times. Now I realize there are many sensitive, caring, supportive woman in the world. I have to retrain myself to believe that I have a right to be appreciated and respected. The only thing to do is to get to know people who are on my emotional level---the ones who can understand what I've been through and accept me for it...and still want to be with me.

I long for the day that we are together again, and pray your forgiveness allows our unity to be transposed, and our lives together to finally begin.  You’re my inspiration, whom led me to believe again.  So wonderfully created, I long to complete your circle and together reach glorious heights; creating miracles to abide within.   You’re a mirror of perfection that is soft spoken, kind, faithful, and true; I see beauty every time I look at you.  I am hopeful for the future…the starting day I’m able to hold your hand, kisses on your lips, and hold each other tightly; never ever having a reason of letting go.  The highest honor it shall be, to walk beside you, hand in hand, throughout the remainder of this lifetime, and into eternity.  Your laugh, your smile, your words, and the way you walk into a room created a sweet melody that instantly desired me to bloom.  I cannot say that I am as perfectly wonderful as you are to me, but I promise you that I will strive daily to be, because I could not bear the thought of not being perfectly imperfect without you.  Yes, I’ve made mistakes in the past, but thankful that you saw me through.  Accepting of who we are capable of being, and what we shall be together as one, continues to motivate me and keeps me pure, because without you, my love, I am not complete…I’m completely happy with the “unknown” timeline, because my heart senses our time is near…near to me, and in my heart you shall forever be.  So, please, hurry back and let’s hold each other forever, because I’m ready to be the person I’m destined to be, right here forever with you. 

With all my heart, love, and spirit… know my words are spoken from clearer vision, and I long to be with YOU, my beloved!

Love,
Me












When we are born it begins a journey.  Along the way on this long winding path we eventually end up seeking many things. One of which is love.  In the beginning, it is from our Mother & Father, then our family, community and so on. Eventually, assuming everything goes right, we begin to find we have a void within us, which other forms of love can’t seem to fill.

We have all known loneliness, a dark emptiness within our soul which seems to stretch for an eternity. We feel like we are apart of nothing, just drifting aimlessly upon the sea of humanity with no destination, nor land in sight. At times despair is like our wet clothing as we shiver cold and alone in the darkness. To distract ourselves we dream of “The One” and how they will lift our spirits and take away the emptiness, this absence of life.

For some, eventually someone comes along and brings light to this darkness. But as humans, sometimes we are by this time so starved to be “touched” that we unknowing make compromises which, if we were rational we would not make. Thus the saying. “Blinded by Love “.  Because, of these compromises, we may never find our true predestined love.

Many of you now, are not in a “Soulmate” relationship. The truth is you got tired of waiting and you settled for the best “offer” at the time. This was your choice, and now is your Karma.  But in your heart, in your soul, you know if someone is your Soulmate, for it goes beyond just love. It is a form of joining.

When you meet your, soul mate  this person will have an instantaneous effect on you.  A Soulmate is someone who makes your knees go weak and you want to catch your breath.  With but a single glance they lesson your burden and but a smile, warms your heart. You will feel a sense of connection affinity  with this person. They will touch you so deeply on so many levels, you will want to share your inner most secrets. For the first time in your life someone will make you feel like almost like divine.  Once you have met your soul mate for better or sometimes worse, your life will never be the same.

One of the things which makes this experience unique is the sense of a meaningful spiritual experience. You both feel like this is to be and that you’ve been together before in a past incarnation. Normally for some, it is several months, weeks or days before physical intimacy sex  occurs. But when you meet your soul mate something happens, the pull or drive to become physically intimate overwhelms many, and one finds it happening basically in the initial meeting.

There’s a sense of safety with this person. You knowingly let go of your defenses as an empathic like bond is formed. Unlike other relationships, in the past, there will be no game playing or hidden agendas which plagued you in the past.

Sometimes the best way to find something, is by not looking for it. With this in mind, you probably will meet your Soulmate when you’re not looking. Since life revels in making things difficult, you’ll probably meet them in the morning when your on the grave yard shift. For many it will be after a bad relationship or several bad relationships.

If you’re lucky you won’t have to wait until your 50 to meet your soul mate. But if you do. Well at least you’ll appreciate it’s significance more, than someone in there twenties. You have had the benefit of experience, the perspective of age and the knowledge, such love is once in a life time.

The point here is***** “Serendipity”****, so forget about taking that “Singles” bus tour to the Circus. Sure you’ll meet a lot of nice people and perhaps you really should get out, but just be prepared to ..Well, meet some real clowns.

The universe is a funny place, don’t be surprised if your Soulmate is older or younger. Soulmate’s don’t care about age. How much older or younger ? From my observations, expect years like 7 to 20. In a true soul mate relationship it won’t matter, if anything it will make you stronger. Life is not neat, nor has it ever been. So why should it start now ?

There is something about the Passion you share with an soul mate. It goes beyond just ” body parts”. For a moment in time you two are the only ones who exist in the universe. Hearts beating in rhythm as your souls have intertwined themselves becoming one. Your personal energies meld and you feel the flame of creation move through you like a wave of the ocean on a hot summers day.

Soon you begin to lose track, of where you begin and your partner ends. From within the depths of your raw passionate union, your soul mate will know how and where to touch you. It will be different, intense and more gratifying than lovers of your past.

They will look into your eyes and you will feel your soul open wide. For some people, there is the “Rush”. All the love, all the lust, all the need will surge forth from your soul like captives from a prison. At this moment you will know what it means to get lost within someone’s eyes. You will experience a touch you have never felt before and your lust will rise to new levels. Often, in the case of true Soulmates, you can get so carried away you can actually hurt yourself. But in the end as you lay there, as the warm afterglow begins to fade, you will realize what just happened was not sex. “Sex, simply doesn’t feel this good.”

To put it simply, your soul mate will be able to make love to you in ways no one else will be able to match.


It is within our nature as human being to fuck things up. The very thing which makes Soulmate love so special, is the one thing which can bring it down. The simple fact is, the unparalelled love & passion is terrifying to many people.

We learned how to have relationships from our parents or primary giver. If your primary givers relationships were dysfunctional, then chances are so are yours. There are many people in this world who in relationships maintain an extreme amount of emotional control. They take pride in the fact that their partner is madly in love with them.

By being able to “wrap them around their finger” they feel safer. Thus, all their relationships become based on this pattern. Then one day their soul mate comes along and wham!. Quickly they discover the control over their heart and the relationship is gone. Now they must relate on a level playing field, and for many, they run.

For those of you who are runners let me tell you what you already know. It doesn’t work. You can move to the other side of the planet, marry someone else and fill up your spare time with some cause. But the simple truth is, your soul mate will be there in your soul. No matter how hard you try, no matter how busy you make yourself, everyday they will enter you thoughts. So then many try and fuck them out. But that doesn’t work either, for it becomes just sex and as you lay there afterwards you will feel empty and cheated.

A good measure of this is a simple test. After you have just made love to the person who you are using as a safe substitute, do you find yourself wanting to “get away” from them? A kind of “Okay, I got off..now get away from me feeling”? (LOL!) This is assuming that you can still get off. In some cases your orgasms are just barely, if you’re lucky. When you were with your soul mate, didn’t you feel the need to remain close, to pull each other tightly and melt into each other? That’s the difference….and one which is very hard to hide from yourself.

If you run, then you’ve made the conscious choice to doom yourself and the other person to be haunted for the rest of your life. Sure, you may eventually fall in love with someone who fits your preconceived image or expectation (cute, rich or successful) of what your partner should be. But as time moves on…you never forget, you always wonder and then you eventually regret. I have a saying:

The Soulmate relationship is worth putting up a fight, but there comes a time when you have done all that you can do and you can do no more. At some point, the one who runs has to choose to stop and come to their senses. Life is sadly cruel, just as it is grand.

It is like having your tender soul ripped from your body. You feel lost, abandoned and betrayed. There is a sense of panic which permeates your very being and personal existence. You find yourself saying, “never again”. You did something you had never done before, you willingly let another in….all the way.

Eventually, after the shock, the depression comes, then the anger and then you just want it all to end. You wish you could just stop feeling…but you can’t. And no matter how much you drink, smoke or eat, you can’t make the pain go away. Yes, regular love hurts too..and badly. But when you lose your soul mate, no matter how enlightened, wise or talented, in both will and spirit you are it is devastating.

Many of us sadly, fail to recover and we truly never “Love” again. Those who are really weak, try to kill themselves. Be it with a car speeding on a wet winding road after drinking, or “J” walking on 42nd street, to just taking one too many pills. The end result is the same if we succeed, suicide is suicide whether you leave a note or not.

In the end, we don’t even want to see the person, because that just tares open the wound over and over. Right or wrong, that’s just the way it is. Eventually, you go on with your life and you stop hating them because like you they will never forget either.

Every now and then life gives us a happy ending. Sometimes, after trying to get their soul mate out of their minds, the “runner” comes to realize what they had lost. A few are wise enough to do whatever it takes to correct the situation and get back into their Soulmates arms. Hopefully, not enough time has gone by so that the situation is salvagable. But oftentimes it’s not. All I can say is TRY. With Soulmates there is NO pride, and there CAN be forgiveness. We are destined to meet our Soulmate, what you do after that is “your” choice.

As I walk my chosen path I say to those …follow me










Do you believe in destiny? Do you believe that out of the billions of humans alive, someone is fated for you, like it’s already written in the stars and all you need to do is wait for the right time to present itself in the right place? Do you believe that the meeting of two people, or thoughts, or hearts happens because of coincidence? Isn’t it amazing how some events in our lives take place even though we do not anticipate it to happen? Personally, I am a strong believer of and of the art of making an unsought finding; Serendipity







There will come a time in your life when you become absolutely infatuated with a single soul. For this person, you'd do anything & not think twice about it, but when asked why, you have no answer. You'll try your whole life to understand how a single person can affect you as much as they do, but you'll never find out. & no matter how badly it hurts or how badly you hate it, you'll love this person for the rest of your life without regret. And even though she doesn't believe in love, he's determined to call her bluff don't let anyone ever promise you that they won't ever hurt you because at one time or another, it'll happen. the real promise is if the time you spent together will be worth the pain in the end.

I kinda miss the bond we shared. I mean, who wouldn't miss that comfortable feeling with a person?

Where we could talk for hours about everything, anything, and not have a problem with the silence in the middle. Can't forget all the ridiculous stuff we did. Stupid or not, everything was just so fun. Endless nights, real talks, the "remember whens", I remember it all. And it's funny what life does, how it could just give you things and take it away so soon. I really can't get it out of my head that you grow distant from people and that good things come to an end sooner or later. But along the way, I learned one good thing about life; it goes on, you just gotta pick yourself up and learn to keep up.

So you make up excuses for why she never comes around. And I know she's going to show up saying she misses you, but honestly whose fault is that? Your address is the same and your phone numbers haven't changed. There's just no excuse for it this time.

That's what you do when you care about someone. You fight like hell to make sure you keep them. Even if they aren't yours. You fight just to know you're alive. Because you know that without them, you'd have no reason to breathe.

Truth is, sometimes you scare the shit out of me. You make me feel as if I’m not alone. Yet, I know any minute you have the ability to rip that feeling from me. Truth is, I love you, and that in itself, is scary enough.

I'm done with the bullshit. Love is a four letter lie when it comes to you.

You turned around and lied without a second thought.

Did I even cross your mind? Or were you just too busy planning with him

Strength isn't about how much you can handle before you break. It's about how much you can handle after you break.

Maybe I fell for your smile, or the way you always say what you mean...without ever actually saying what you mean. I don't know why or how, but I fell. So here it is, my confession to you...I'm insanely and unnaturally in love with you.

You are an amazing creature. You deserve to be loved until your insides melt. Don't give up on all the things you want. When you meet the right person you will have zero doubt in your mind. Zero.
















For years, I tried to find "The One.” Everywhere I went, I was looking. Dinner parties, political functions, Sunday morning services, the dry cleaners, the subway car–Not even going to the market at midnight gave me a reprieve from my relentless search. Yet, in spite of all this looking, I never found HER anywhere. If I was trying that hard and still couldn't force love to come my way, how can I now suggest that you actually commit yourself to finding something which we apparently have little to no control over?

Here’s why. The love I sought remained out of reach until I’d actually set an intention to find love and committed myself 100% to becoming the woman I would need to be in order to attract it. I'm convinced of it



Remember, in our inmost being, we are all completely lovable because spirit is love. Beyond what anyone can make you think or feel about yourself, your unconditioned spirit stands, shining with a love nothing can tarnish.

After a few (or many) bad relationships, it’s so easy to shut down, give up, and stop believing that the right person is out there for us. Our hearts yearn to fall in love, but our minds insist it’s not possible, and we enter into a tug-of-war with ourselves. It’s as if one part of us is screaming, Yes! I deserve a great relationship! while another part insists, I’ll never find him or her. When our beliefs contradict our desires, we experience an inner conflict that not only paralyzes us, but can actually prevent us from recognizing the possibilities for love that exist all around us.


The universal Law of Attraction states that we draw to us those people, events, and circumstances that match our inner state of being. In other words, we attract experiences that are consistent with our beliefs. If we believe that there is plenty of love in the world and we are worthy of giving and receiving that love, we will attract a different quality of relationships than someone who believes in scarcity or feels unworthy of happiness. If we believe the world is a loving and friendly place, then most of the time that will be our experience. If we believe the world is a chaotic, stressful, and fearful place, then eventually that will become our reality. So, believing and knowing that your soulmate is out there is a critical first step in the formula for manifesting him or her into your life.


It amazes me that people think their soul mate is going to show up in their life at this predestined time and be this flawless person. A true soul mate is a mirror of yourself, the person who shows you everything that is holding you back, the person who brings you to your own attention so you can change your life. Sure, they have a common upbringing, similar interests but they have the one thing you don’t have which is the introspection to help you become great. What use is a soul mate if they can’t help free you from yourself so you can live your life mission?”

What is it which makes a man and a woman know that they, of all other men and women in the world, belong to each other? Is it no more than chance and meeting? no more than being alive together in the world at the same time? Is it only a curve of the throat, a line of the chin, the way the eyes are set, a way of speaking? Or is it something deeper and stranger, something beyond meeting, something beyond chance and fortune? Are there others, in other times of the world, whom we should have loved, who would have loved us? Is there, perhaps, one soul among all others--among all who have lived, the endless generations, from world's end to world's end--who must love us or die? And whom we must love, in turn--whom we must seek all our lives long--headlong and homesick--until the end?”














0 reasons why I can't STILL find my soulmate

I may not believe in destiny or fate but, for some odd reason, I believe in finding my better half or my soulmate. For years, i’ve been trying to find one through the method of “collect and select”. Sad to say, I can’t still find him. I know that this may not be the proper time yet to find him and be my husband but, I would gladly meet and entertain him any time. I know that you may not really know it at first sight but, you’ll feel it when you actually met him. I’m such a hopeless romantic. Needless to say, i’ve been thinking of any reasons if I can’t find him and I’ll just move on with my life without any man at my side. I came up with  10 reasons on why I can’t find my dearest soulmate.

10. He/she may have already died or killed himself/herself.

Think about it. He/She may have met an unfortunate accident before we actually meet them. Sad to say, this can happen. He/she might have died before birth or after birth. In a more negative point of view, he/she may have killed himself/herself, believing that there’s no one else in the world that would love them or care for them.

On the side note, may their souls rest in peace.

9. He/She may have been with the wrong person all along.

This is quite inevitable. Almost everyone has experienced this. We think that we found the right person yet, he/she isn’t the ONE we’ve been waiting for all our lives. Also, he/she might have been forced into an arranged marriage/marriage out of convenience. Well, that can certainly happen as well.

8. He might be a priest right now or someone who can’t marry due to his/her duties.

No doubt about it. I know that I may be going to hell for this but, sometimes, I think that there are priests that may be our soulmates. However, they chose to be with God. there’s nothing wrong about it, i guess.

7. He/She forgets about love due to his/her career/studies/obligation.

Yes. There are a lot of people like that. They forget about the aspect of love due to their love for their career and such. They chose to be loyal on what they do in life. This isn’t really selfish at all if you’re doing it for mankind. Needless to say, it’s still a loss for love and a gain for humanity.

6. He/She may be gay or a tomboy.

Sometimes, this happens too. There’s nothing with it. We could only accept them as they are right now. This may sound cliche but, if there are happy with their lives right now, we could only be happy for them as well. He/She may find their love.

5. He/She might really love someone else more than you.

This is harder to accept than anything else in the world. :(

4. He/She might be in a coma or have a physical/mental sickness right now.

This could also happen as well as if, time has stopped for them in this world. There’s nothing wrong with this. Just be patient, okay.

On the side note, let’s pray for them to get well soon.

3. He/She’s still in the process of finding you.

Hey! Out of 7 billion people in this world, almost 3.5 billion people can be your soulmate. He/She may still be a child or already an older man/woman. Love has no age or boundaries as well so, live with it! It’s hard to find you, you know.

2. He/She’s still trying to accept you.

Believe me. This is harder than we thought it could be. We may not believe that he/she is our actual soulmate. He/She may be far from our ideal man/woman or we’re far from his/her ideal man/woman. Well, he/she may or may not accept you.

1. We’re just too blind.

Let’s not forget that we have our own faults as well. Sometimes, we’re just too blind. Our soulmate may already be infront of you yet, we ignore them because we can’t accept the fact that he/she’s our soulmate. He/she may be the person who got friendzoned by you. We might be the one who ruined the chance of finding our soulmate. Sometimes, we’re just too insensitive, i guess. So, Be careful, ne?  Whatever decision you’ll make in your life might lose our chance on finding the ONE.