PERSONAL: CHANGING THE PICTURE IN MY HEAD

We all have individual goals and aspirations that we want to achieve at different points in our lives.

We each have certain milestones we expect to happen by a certain age; by the time we turn 18, we expect to graduate high school, go to college and have a degree by age 22.Some of us also have a set picture in our minds of what our lives should look like.

I expect to date and marry someone only if she has “X” common interests,  or comes from “X” cultural background. I also hope to live in “X” neighborhood and have “X” lifestyle. All I have to do next is take the necessary actions, and voila! All will fall into place… right?

Despite my best efforts, sometimes life doesn’t always go as anticipated and opportunities just don’t present themselves. Then I start thinking in “shoulds,” “musts” or “have tos.” For example, “I SHOULD have a family of my own by now; “I HAVE TO date someone who likes the same music as I do.” We place extra pressure on ourselves to make complete that image in our heads.
It’s pertinent to have an easygoing disposition because we have no idea what the future holds. Unfortunately, there is no way to predict it. Sometimes, surrendering to the unknown is our only option. Embarking on new territory can be frightening, but also freeing. We don’t always have control over what will happen to us or who will impact our lives, and that’s okay!

There are a million unexpected possibilities regarding what could go wrong. Perhaps a family member gets ill..or lime me..I got divorce. We all have experienced some type of obstacle or setback. Though these events may not be what you had predicted for your life, there is no use in feeling dejected or immobilized by them.

“It would be nice if I were in a relationship, but I am okay being single for now.” This is what I say to myself.. I notice I started to i became less rigid and less anxious. There’s no proof that my original assumptions about life would pan out, anyway. Who knows; the harsh realities of situations could lead to better circumstances and be more rewarding than your original dream. Changing the picture in my head isn’t settling or lowering your standards; it’s cutting myself some slack, rolling with the punches and being okay with plan B. It’s opening yourself up to a world of opportunity you never knew existed..like being in this site.I am opening my life new possibilities. Remember, “What screws us up the most in life is the picture in our head of what it’s supposed to be.”