JOURNAL

As I was looking at my photograph...i wonder is anyone ever alone. I sometimes feel alone. But our feelings aren't trustworthy. I look at my picture as a child, teenager..and now adult... I notice every form self I have left behind is a ghost. My body is no longer the body of a child. My thoughts, desires, fears, and hopes have changed. It would be terrible to walk with all the dead selves holding on. I have to let go. Even the self I am today is a ghost. So what does that teach me? That death has been with me every moment of my life. I have survived thousands of death every day as my old thoughts, my old cells, my old emotions,....and even my old identity passed away.

Sometimes my ghost seem real...as real as dreams. We are not the same person we were five, ten of fifteen years ago. Our personalities are constantly evolving, transforming, growing. What holds our ghost is memory. We continue to remember how the old life was. When we die.....the afterlife will become real and the physical world will become a dream. It's just a matter of perspective. When we are in a physical body...our perspective makes physicality real. When we are dreaming at might, the dream state become real. When we cross over.. both waking and dreaming are unreal. Consciousness is convinced by its own creations.